Buffy - Not the Only One Anymore
by LanaaLuthor
Summary: Continuation of Buffy the Vampire Slayer series; Buffy and the Scooby Gang are heading to England to start over, only they don't suspect that another battle awaits. Will they survive? How will it all end? I will tie all loose ends the show left behind and definitely end it.
1. Chapter 1 England

**Description:** Continuation of Buffy the Vampire Slayer series.

Buffy and the Scooby Gang are heading to England to start over, only they don't suspect that another battle awaits. Will they survive? How will it all end?

**(in this fic I will tie all loose ends the show left behind and definitely end it)**

**AN: **There is a video (spoiler alert! Best to see it after reading about 10 chapters), in my profile.

* * *

**Season 8 **

**Chapter 1 England**

* * *

Into every generation a slayer is born, one girl alone will…

I say f*** it and…

…I changed the rules

* * *

Watching Sunnydale being destroyed was a shock for all the members of Scooby Gang. They all knew that they succeeded, they all knew they should've been happy the Hellmouth was gone, but… they just couldn't. That was their home. Willow and Xander had grown up in there. Buffy had found true family there, her first love, first heartbreak, first great success in slaying. Sunnydale was all Dawn, Buffy's sister, knew. Destroying Hellmouth had been Giles's aim and now it was gone.

What next?

Maybe the worst part was that they weren't completely free. It didn't end here. It never did. Barely had the Sunnydale disappeared when Giles told them there was another Hellmouth in Cleveland.

Would their lives always be like that? Another day. Another fight? Until they would die or get old? The first option more probable.

Now they were all sitting in an old motel in a small town near to where Sunnydale used to be, trying to figure out what to do next until Giles suggested something.

"England?" Buffy had to make sure she heard it right.

"Yes, England. Buffy… I know you hoped for some leisure time to relax and cope with all of those things that happened to us but…" he spread his arms like he wasn't sure what to say, "we'll have a lot of work to do. In fact… ehm… I've already bought a… certain mansion to… ehm… for our main quarter and we could command…"

"Command with what?" Buffy asked, even more surprised.

"The Army of Slayers," he answered.

"The Army?" This time it was Faith who spoke.

"We have to find them all, make them realize what they really are and what they're capable of. Willow can sense them now so I think it's the most reasonable thing to do."

"Yesss…" Willow closed her eyes, her face dreamy as she inhaled the air deeply. "This is so… ow! The closest slayer is only a few miles away!"

"Besides," Giles continued, "there is no imminent danger in England right now. Actually, no one has seen a vampire for a few months and we can all have some rest in there."

"And what about us?" Xander asked, standing up and looking at Giles.

Buffy and everybody else was impressed how strong he actually was inside. He hadn't broken yet and, after all, the woman he'd loved had just died.

"About who?" Giles took off his glasses and started cleaning them up in his old habit. "What do you mean?"

"I don't have any superpowers just like Dawn," Xander pointed Buffy's little sister.

She looked at him and… Buffy felt something disturbing, because Dawn for sure still had this teenager crush on Xander. Maybe it would be better if she kept her little sister away from him. It could be months or even years before Xander would stop mourning over Anya's death. And even then Buffy doubted he would be interested in Dawnie.

"Dawn is my sister and she goes when I go," Buffy said like there was no use of even talking about it. "We need Willow and Giles and we need you, too, Xander…"

He looked down and Buffy suddenly felt sorry for him. He was so sad that she wanted to hug him to give him some comfort. He'd lost his eye, he'd lost his girl…

So Buffy just did it. They all needed each other right now more than ever.

She reached to him and put her arms around him.

"Xander, what would we've done without you?" she asked him and then let him go.

She felt very safe beside him. He was the only man, except Giles, whom she could trust one hundred percent and he was a human. Not a vampire.

"We need you as much as we need everybody here," she reassured him while looking in the only eye he had left and held his hand. "You know, you still have those military skills and if we want to build an army of slayers… of course we have to ask them first…" she turned to Giles, "we'll really, really need you, you're irreplaceable, Xander."

"So… I'm the only one who has no purpose? I'm just your little sister?!" Dawn got angry.

"I'm sorry, young lady but…" Buffy came closer to her," I have no job for you, because you already have one! Have you actually graduated from high school?"

Dawn was furious.

"And what about me?" suddenly Andrew asked.

"For you… there'll always be some dirty work," Xander joked with a smile and patted his back.

* * *

Buffy went outside to the porch and found Xander there.

He was standing by the banister, looking at the stars in the sky.

"Do you think that ex-demons can count for some redemption? You know, in some… happy dimension?" he asked like he sensed that Buffy was there.

"Of course. She died saving somebody else's life. That is the greatest sacrifice one can make. I'm sure that she and… Spike…" his name came with difficulty. "I'm sure they're happy wherever they are."

"You know… thank you for everything," he changed the theme quickly, startling her a little bit.

"No, thank _you_," she said.

"For what?" he turned around and looked her in the eye.

"For surviving. I couldn't bear if I lost you, too."

They looked each other in the eyes and they still couldn't understand the mysterious link between them.

Then Buffy turned around and walked away.


	2. Chapter 2 The Slayers

**AN: **Thank you for all your reviews! I will definitely finish this story, because I've already had it written, it just needed to be fixed. I first created this when I wasn't as good in English as I am now after I have got my BA. Also, I wanted to make it better, because it was very bad before: ) So you don't have to be worried that it will be left unfinished. It's already finished : )

* * *

**Chapter 2**

**The Slayers**

"It's your decision. You can choose a normal life or… you can go with us to England to receive a proper training. You can make a difference in this world. When I was the only one I couldn't even dream of achieving what we can achieve now. We can help people. We can fight the darkness in this world and make it a better and safer place. This time we actually have enough strength when together to be a significant opponent to evil," Buffy was making her speech to the rest of the slayers.

Buffy suddenly thought that she should write that speech down. It could come useful when she would find more slayers.

Only two of the slayers wanted to go back to their families. The rest, including Kennedy, wanted to go to England.

"Alright," Buffy said. "Those of you who want to come back home… you can pack up your things, say goodbye and I'm sure that Giles will find you some safe transport."

"Yes," Giles said, looking at his papers with the girls' data. "You can go, but I would like to be in touch with you in case something happens," he said.

"Ok, I'm going to find Willow." Kennedy walked to the door.

"Cold you ask her for more precise location of the slayer that she sensed?" Giles asked. "If she's close we have to talk to her."

"I'll tell her," Kennedy promised and left the room.

"Thank you… Buffy?" Giles looked at his slayer.

Her face was strange now, absent. She didn't pay any attention as she was obviously thinking hard about something. "Buffy, is everything alright? What is it that bothers you?"

"It's noth… it's Angel," she admitted very quietly with a sigh, so Giles could barely hear her. "I'm just wondering… maybe I should… you know… visit him? Let him know that everything's fine, see him for the last time…"

"I'm not sure it's such a good idea. Maybe you could call him?" he suggested.

"Yeah... If he needs me, then I'll come visit," she said and also left the room.

"Faith, find Xander and Dawn and tell them what we have decided."

"Ok." She shrugged. Her face was grumpy and kind of sad. Principal Wood had left them shortly after he'd got better.

* * *

"Angel?" Buffy almost whispered his name when he picked up the phone.

"Buffy…" he sounded relieved. "Good to know you're ok. What about the rest?"

"Anya and Spike are dead," she said with no emotions in her voice. If she'd said it differently, she would've cried and she didn't want Angel to know how weak she was at the moment.

"Oh… I'm so sorry… but my…"

"Yes. Your locket worked. It was a miracle. Spi… he… he saved us all," she said, twirling the phone cable around her wrist.

"I'm glad. It's good news."

"Yes. Who'd say that he could sacrifice himself for all of us."

"Yeah…"

"Maybe… Do you want me to come?" she asked and held her breath while waiting for his answer.

"Buffy… oh… I don't know if it's such a good idea. I'm in the middle of something right now. I'll tell you what it is when I find out more, I promise. Where are you going?"

"To England," she answered, being a little disappointed.

"England…" he repeated with surprise.

She told him what the plan was.

"I know where it is. It's a lonely castle… Nobody's lived there for years."

"Giles reassured us that he had it renovated and said that right now it's a great place."

"If he said so…"

There was nothing more to say… and it felt so awkward.

* * *

"Dawn, Xander…" Faith walked into the room next door.

Those two were sitting in two different corners of the room. Dawn was looking through the window, then at Xander and again, through the window.

Xander was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling.

Despite the hope that Dawn had, he hadn't noticed her at all. It was like always: Buffy's younger sister in love with her best friend. A friend who'd always made fun of that crush and now was sure that she'd got passed it. She couldn't expect that suddenly, right after the woman he'd loved had died, he would immediately turn his attention to her.

Dawn hated herself for feeling relieved that Xander was alone again, so she chose to forget that those feelings were inside of her.

"People! Move! We're leaving!" Faith raised her voice a little and then, after having said that, she walked out of the room.

* * *

Buffy was thinking was else she could say to Angel. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, but she didn't dare.

What had happened? Why was he so mysterious? What was he exploring? What was he looking for?

"Buffy… oh, I'm sorry, you're talking," she heard Xander's voice behind her. She turned around and just one look was enough to let Xander know who she was talking to. "Oh, maybe I'll just go."

"Is that Xander?" she heard Angel's voice on the phone.

"Yes. I have to go."

"I'll contact you soon."

"You're so mysterious…" she sighed heavily. "I hope you won't keep me in the dark forever. I want to know what it is."

"It's nothing that concerns you. It's me... I love you."

"Yeah… me, too." She hung up.

Xander didn't say a word even though he wanted to._ It would be better for you if…_ no, he wouldn't say that. Not like this. It wouldn't have changed her feelings anyway.

* * *

They visited the slayer Willow sensed. She turned out to be a 31 years old mother of two children and a happy wife. It was obvious that she wouldn't go with them. She wouldn't throw everything away just for the training. But still, it was the Scooby Gang's duty to make her realize what she was capable of now.

"What? Are you crazy? Vampires?!" she laughed at loud.

She stopped laughing when Buffy caught a vampire after dark and killed it just before her eyes.

"Patricia…" Buffy started, calling the woman by her name, "it's nothing wrong, nothing to be afraid of. Just think, you have the power and thanks to it you can protect your children from any harm. Don't forget about it, don't deny it. I'd been doing it when I used to be the only one, but I didn't have the choice that you have. You can still be a mother and a wife. You just… are stronger than before. It's not a curse… Only, when you happen to see a vampire, stake them, ok?"

"Of… of course," she stammered. Her husband wasn't home yet, so the Scooby Gang didn't find out whether she'd actually told him or not.

Buffy would like to tell. It reminded her of the history of her own past relationships. Relationships with vampires had no future and if it hadn't been a vampire, she would've had to lie her whole life. She would've had to deny who she really was. She couldn't do that. That was why she would probably wait her whole life for Angel, what was completely stupid or, she would just stay alone. Single. She needed a man who would know all of her secrets and be her best friend in the same time. Where would she find somebody like that? It would've been easier if she'd been a lesbian, she thought and laughed at her own joke. She felt a little bit better.


	3. Chapter 3 Arrival

**3 Arrival**

During the long flight to England nobody said anything. There was a movie they could watch on the plane, but they didn't even see the screen. They were all so dispirited and busy with their own gloomy thoughts.

Buffy was still replaying the whole battle in her head, She was thinking about both Angel and Spike. She'd told Spike that she'd loved him, but she wasn't sure if it'd been honest. The moment had seemed right at the time. She thought that she could actually say those words to Xander or Willow and it didn't have to mean "I love you like a woman can love her man". It was more like "I love you as a friend". She was just very grateful for what he'd done for all of them… And he'd known. He'd known she hadn't said like he would've wanted her to… She couldn't have fooled him.

Willow was thinking about her future. She was planning on staying with Buffy as she would be the most useful with her slayer friend. She was a goddess now, even if she still couldn't wrap her mind around it. She just had to find a way to do her job and have a normal relationship with Kennedy in the same time. But had she ever had anything normal since she'd become a witch?

Xander still couldn't get out of his haze after Anya's death. He hadn't been even sure they could have a relationship again. He hadn't been sure if they'd sleep together just because of the imminent war or because they'd been in love. They'd both thought they wouldn't survive back there, And she hadn't while he… What would he do now? Would he ever have something normal in his life? Something that didn't involve demons? He really doubted it. He was surrounded by the supernatural and he was all alone in this. Even Dawn, who seemed to be completely normal, was the Key. She'd been created for Buffy, not born. Where Xander fitted here? Had he ever?

Giles was trying to figure out how to provide for so many people under one roof. What should he do with them? How should he organize their time? Could they have some rest as Buffy had suggested or there was something dark on the horizon again? He would have to check his books… just to be sure.

Dawn was in a horrible mood and the fact that she was still a teenager just made it worse. Everybody and everything had no sense for her right now. Life had no sense…

Maybe only Andrew was a little bit happy and full of hope. He'd lived through the worst, so now it was the final time for change. Change for the better. He could, at last, start a new and honest life among his new friends. He knew such a chance came very rarely and he had to take it. He didn't deserve to survive, but he would do anything in his power to be a better man, because of that fact.

* * *

"So, we're here," Buffy said when Giles showed them the castle with a theatrical swing of his arm while smiling broadly.

"Hmm…" Willow's sentence was clearly over.

Only Dawn was full of sudden enthusiasm.

"Didn't you use to dream about living in a castle as a princess?" she asked with a smile. She regretted her words right after she'd said that, because Xander looked at her, pretty amused. _Damn, I'm still just a little girl in his eyes!_ She thought.

"I think it can be interesting," he said, straightening his eye-patch.

"So… let's go…"

They had to climb up the high hill before they reached the castle.

From outside it looked like an austere building and the only thing that made a castle out of it were the little donjons on top of it.

"Without those it could be… a very big, old house," Buffy noticed and made Willow laugh.

"Do you really think so?" Giles asked her anxiously. "Alright then… find me a better place where I can fit a whole army! I'm open to any suggestions!"

Buffy preferred to stay quiet for now. Giles was, indeed, right.

This old building, not pretty or famous enough to make it as a museum, was a perfect place for their command centre. It had an enormous field on the other side where they could train and a lot of rooms inside where they could sleep and live – total opposite to Buffy's old house in which they'd been crammed in the living room with only two bathrooms!

"Ok, I'm seeing the bigger picture right now," she admitted. "What about our rooms? Are they at least heated?"

"First floor, corridor on the left," Giles said while opeing the main door to the castle and they brought their luggage in. "Those rooms are heated for now. We'll think about the rest later."

"We can use magic," Willow suggested. "That way we'll be able to save some power and money."

"Good idea, Willow."

They walked into a cold, enormously spatial and, luckily, enlightened by electricity hall.

"Wow… if it wasn't for those lamps I would feel like in the Middle Ages," Xander whispered and it sounded weird because of the acoustic. "Upstairs?"

"Let's race upstairs! The first take the best rooms!" Dawn squealed, forgetting again that she supposed to seem more mature and she ran.

Buffy knew her sister wasn't happy with the new arrangements. Dawn probably hated England, so she thought she could at least give her little sister some fun.

"Ok!" she agreed and rushed right after Dawn.

The rest took the hint and ran, too. Willow felt very cold, so she thought it would make her feel better.

Giles was left behind, still standing in the hall and he sighed heavily, took off his glasses and started cleaning them up.

* * *

Dawn was running right beside Andrew, saw Xander walking into the room at the end of the corridor, so she chose the room next to it and…

"Young lady, this room is already taken!" Buffy was inside.

"Buffy!" Dawn was furious. "You're always the fastest! It's not fair that you're using your powers to win!" She already knew she lost.

"I know… I admit that sometimes… we all behave like children but… there's a little bit of a child in every single one of us, isn't it, Dawnie? I like this room, so I'm staying here, period." Buffy didn't really want to spoil her sister's fun, but she had no choice. She saw what was coming and there was only one way to stop it. Xander needed some privacy now and Dawn didn't need a broken heart or rejection.

"But… why this one?"

"Because I like it best." Buffy shrugged.

Dawn stamped her leg in anger.

"Hey, girls, which one of you is my new neighbor?" they heard Xander's voice coming from the door.

"That will be me," Buffy waved at him. "You're the one on the left?"

"Yeah. And you, Dawnie?" he turned to her.

She didn't say anything, just growled at Buffy and walked out of the room.

"What's wrong with her?" Xander asked Buffy.

"She wanted this room."

"Why?"

"I don't know, Xander," Buffy sighed, obviously lying.

Xander was way too old for her little sister as she was still in high school and even beside that, there was one, the most important thing: he'd just lost his sweetheart.

* * *

"Buffy… dinner!" Willow knocked on Buffy's door. "Have you unpacked yet?"

"Almost," Buffy smiled. "This room is much more comfortable now but… gee… it's so cold!"

"England…" Willow shrugged. "You know, last time I was here…" she stopped for a moment. "I got used to this country. I even loved it… but don't worry about the cold. Soon I'll work on some permanent heating spell, I promise."

They went downstairs to a diner room where almost everybody had already been sitting by the huge table. There were three free chairs, two right beside Xander and one next to Andrew. Buffy and Willow automatically went towards Xander. When after a few seconds later Dawn came down and saw Andrew she got even more anxious.

"Dawn… chill up," Buffy growled at her from across the table. "We'll find you some school and you won't even notice when you'll have a lot of new friends, who knows, maybe even a boyfriend."

The girl didn't say a word.

"Actually, Dawn is already signed up for school. It's about 15 minutes by bus from the bus stop under the hill," Giles said while sipping his tea.

"Thank you," Buffy turned to him.

"Do I have to go to school? Couldn't I help… I don't know, you, Xander, Giles… anyone? Even Andrew? That will be like a job."

"Dawn…" Buffy shut her down. "You have to receive a proper education and after dinner I really want to talk to you. I'm serious."


	4. Chapter 4 Vampire

**4 vampire**

Late in the evening Willow and Xander went for a walk and bumped into Buffy.

"What are you doing here all alone, Buff?" Xander asked.

"It's so… annoying," she admitted.

"What is?"

"There's not a single vampire in here!" she sighed and her friends burst out laughing. "What's so funny?!" she asked, agitated.

"You got used to your patrols and now you don't know what to do with the time you have or you just want to stake something?" Willow asked.

"And please, tell us it's the first one, because otherwise we'll have to say you're changing into Faith," Xander added.

"Of course it's the first reason!" Buffy yelled and then started laughing, too. Then she smacked them lightly in their heads. "It's not as bad as it seems to be… wait, I just remembered that I have something to do. I have to talk to Dawn."

"About her new school?" Willow got curious as they moved forward together.

"Yes… and some other stuff," Buffy added.

"It won't be easy for her. A new school, in a new, foreign country…" Xander started. "Wait a minute… no, I'm taking it all back! She'll be an American girl in an English school! She'll be popular the first day she'll go there. Why didn't we do something like that when we were in high school?"

They laughed again and then Buffy suddenly stopped.

"What happened?" Willow asked a little concerned.

"I think I just…" she didn't finish, because a vampire jumped out of the bushes, "and I was right!" she yelled, staking him before he even managed to attack them.

"Didn't I hear that there were no vampires in this country right now?" Xander asked. "Giles? Where is Giles when you need him?"

They went back to the castle and straight to the library.

"Giles! Wow…" Willow stopped in the middle of the room, staring at hundreds of shelves with heavy and enormously huge volumes of books. "Wow!" she repeated. "This is so much better than the library in Sunnydale! It's real…"

"Willow," Buffy stopped her.

"Oh… I'm sorry… but… wow!" She waved her hands.

"What happened?" They saw Giles coming toward them through the shelves, carrying a lot of books in his arms.

"Vampire," Buffy just said.

"Excuse me?"

"Here, in England. Practically in our garden!"

There was a loud rumble when Giles dropped all the books he was carrying.

"But… I said that no one has seen a vampire in England for…"

"There was one. Right here," Buffy interrupted him.

"Buffy…" Xander said. "I'm starting to think that they came here because of you!"

"That's not true!"

"It is!"

"Actually, Xander may be right," Giles interrupted this nonsensical quarrel, "but they are here not only for you, Buffy. They're trying to survive, so they're sending as many of his allays as they can to kill the slayers."

"But he didn't even manage to attack me!" she yelled.

"As you said… in England there are no vampires right now. They are weak. But there will be more, you'll see. It's only a matter of time."

"Great!" it was Faith who just entered the library. "What?" she asked seeing their faces. "I can't wait to kick some asses!"

Buffy looked up and sighed.

"I have to go," she said and pointed the ceiling. "Dawn's waiting for me."

"I'm going in the same direction," Xander said and they walked out of the library together.


	5. Chapter 5 Crush

**5 Crush**

"What's your plan for tomorrow?" Xander asked while they were climbing up the stairs.

"Well, I guess I'm going with Dawn to her new school to see if there are any monsters or ghosts up there," Buffy answered.

"Hah," Xander laughed. "Seriously? You're really looking for a job!"

"Yeah… but I also want dawn to be safe. After everything we've been through in Sunnydale…"

"Relax, it's England. What bad can happen here?"

"Ghost?" Buffy asked.

"Well, maybe that one," Xander admitted.

"And then…" she continued, "I don't know, I guess I'll join Giles and start to organize something. We need to prepare the castle for the slayers' arrival. What about you?"

"For me there is a very serious and in the same time very pleasant thing to do, I'll check our armory," he said joyfully, "and Willow will probably meditate or something, to find more slayers."

"Yeah… Dawn! Wait!" Buffy yelled when she spotted Dawn walking into her room. "Wait for me! We have to talk!"

Her little sister just sulked.

"Ok, I'll go, see you tomorrow, girls!" Xander sped up a little bit and disappeared in his room. He walked to the window and opened it to air the place, then he went to the bathroom to take a shower.

"What is it? School?" Dawn asked, sitting in a chair by the window in Buffy's room. "Gosh, I hate the smell of those old stone walls." She opened the window.

"Is there something that you don't hate?" Buffy asked ironically. "This castle is actually pretty nice. You know, it's like living in the old times or… museum…" she stammered on the sudden realization.

"Buffy?"

"Aha?"

"Could you, please, be so nice and not embarrass me at school tomorrow?"

"Why would I embarrass you?"

"You know… following me around? No offence, but I can find everything by myself and if I don't, I'll just ask somebody and… what's most important… do not check the whole school in search for some paranormal activities, ok?"

"Dawn, we're in England and in fact… it should mean that you can find even more ghosts here than in America. We're living in an old castle!"

"Don't try to scare me."

"Giles said that there should be no vampires but he didn't mention anything about different stuff."

"Buffy!"

"Ok, Ok," Buffy smiled.

* * *

Xander walked out of the bathroom and went to bed.

_Damn_, he though. It was cold, because he'd forgotten to close the window.

"It's about Xander," he heard Buffy's voice and stopped.

"What about him?" Dawn asked.

* * *

"It's how you look at him, how you behave when he's around… Dawn, I really wouldn't mind if, a, you haven't been so young for him, but even this I would finally accept if, b, he liked you that way and, c, he didn't suffer because of Anya's death. Is it so hard to understand?"

"Buffy…"

"Ok," Buffy raised her hands in surrender. "I'm sorry… I know it's difficult for you and I know what you're feeling right now. I'd been there… more of less… do you remember this guy from my university? Parker? He rejected me and I was suffering for a long time, so I do understand… but in the same moment I also learnt something very important. If a guy is really interested in you, he'll find a way to be with you. He'll find you even at the end of the world! We really don't have to chase them. All we have to do is let them chase us."

"But it was Anya who was chasing after Xander…"

"She'd been suffering a lot before he got really interested in her… It's so hard to give you the right example right now… Spike was chasing me… Riley, too. And how it ended up? With Spike it started with hate and then, I gave up."

"But it's so hard, Buffy!" Dawn growled. "I see him every single day! We live under the same roof!"

"I know," Buffy sighed, "but you're going to a new school. You're gonna be the attraction number one. When British guys come to America, American girls love them and when American girls come to England…"

"I get you point."

"Exactly… I just want you to know that I'm here for you."

"It's not gonna help me. I always wanted to be like you. You're so strong."

"Honey, I'm not strong, I just don't let myself break."

"It's enough."

"Sweet dreams."

"You throwing me out?"

"I'm sleepy." Buffy yawned to prove it. "You don't look so good, either."

Dawn followed her example and they laughed.

"Ok, I'll go."

"You know what?"

"Hmm?"

"I think Andrew likes you."

"But I don't like him."

"Then be his friend. He may even surprise you. He doesn't have anyone close here."

"Ok."

Dawn left the room and Buffy closed the window.

* * *

Xander stood by his window for a while, staring at the stars.

No, he couldn't get interested in Dawn and the real reason wasn't even the one that he'd lost Anya or even that Dawnie was so young… It was about something else.

_"You still love her…"_ he heard Angel's voice in his head. Angel had said those words to him a long time ago, back in high school.

_Always, _Xander thought and closed his window. He finally laid down and fell asleep.


	6. Chapter 6 Dawn's school

**6 Dawn's school**

They spent few days just organizing everything. Willow found a room – or maybe the more appropriate word would be a chamber – in a different part of the castle, because she didn't want anybody to disturb her.

Giles arranged a gym in the old dungeon and also helped Xander to make some place for their stock of armory.

Xander found a source on the black market where he could buy a lot of weapons without any questions. He also got stakes and wooden arrows.

"But I have to go to meet them, they don't send those stuff in mail," he said. "Giles… I saw a truck here. I would really need it right now."

"Ok, but I'm going with you. I won't let you go alone, Xander. You don't know them, they can be dangerous."

Xander rolled his eyes and sighed, but he agreed, because Giles would be really helpful with loading weapons to the truck. They left the day Dawn was going to her new school.

"Are you sure that you don't want me to check this building up?" Buffy asked her sister, a little disappointed.

She was bored. Since she'd killed that one vampire she hadn't found another.

"Yes, I'm sure!" Dawn got angrier. "Can I go now?"

"I have to go with you anyway. As your legal guardian I have to sign your papers. Giles wasn't able to do that."

"Ok!" Dawn growled at her. "But only if you don't take the bus with me! They all would think I need to be led by my hand…"

"Ok, I'll take Giles's car," Buffy interrupted Dawn, very exasperated by now.

"Buffy, it's not a very good idea," Willow suddenly cut in. "You know… you and cars? Really?" She was carrying a lot of books and some herbs while obviously going to her chamber.

"Eh…" Buffy stammered, realizing that her friend was right. Buffy driving a car equaled accident.

"I can take you," Andrew offered his help. "I don't have anything to do, beside this castle scares me a little. I could've sworn that I heard some really disturbing noise last night."

"Better don't swear, Andrew," Buffy warned him. "Thanks. That will be great but… it may be a while before I'll come back from the principal office."

"That's ok," he shrugged.

Dawn took her bag and they finally drove to school.

Buffy wasn't even surprised when they were welcomed by the police.

They got out of the car and wondered what had happened.

"Let's go, Dawn. Andrew, do you want to stay in the car?"

"Oh, hell yes!"

"Like I thought. Let's go. We'll see what's that all about."

"Probably some little accident."

"Rule number one: it's never just an accident."

When they were closer to the door, they passed by two policemen carrying a body in a black bag.

"Excuse me, what happened? I just came here to sign my sister up for school and…"

"You don't need to be worry, m'am. It was just an accident, one of them said.

"How it happened?"

Dawn noticed that the policemen were distracted, so she peaked into the bag. She practically jumped.

"Young lady! You can't do that! It a violation…"

But Buffy and Dawn were already gone.

"Dawn?" Buffy turned to her while they found themselves inside of the building. Her little sister was disgusted. "What did you see?"

"A body… mutilated body… in… pieces!" Dawn was shaking.

"Everything's alright? Are you feeling ok?"

Dawn took a few deep breaths.

"Yes. It's better now."

"Ok. Let's go, then."

They knocked on the principal office's door and at the words_ 'please, come in'_, they walked inside.

"You must be the new girl, right?" The principal was sitting by his desk.

Buffy thought that he looked strange like he was sick. He was pale, his eyes strangely red and he was shaking a little bit.

"I'm sorry. This case… I hope you won't change the school right now. We don't have a lot of accidents around here, I can assure you."

"I understand... I'm Buffy Summers…"

They walked out of there after a couple of minutes and Dawn went towards the stairs to the second floor.

"Dawn… just be careful. It can be something really dangerous," Buffy warned her. She really had some suspicions and the man she'd just met looked weird, too. Or maybe he was just touched by what had happened in his school…

"I will," Dawn promised, this time finally being serious.

"See you."


	7. Chapter 7 Demon

**7 Demon**

Dawn fitted into her new school very fast. Xander had been right – everybody liked the new American girl. There was something exotic about her and they liked her accent. Of course, as it was typical of any school, there were also haters, but this time it was just a group of the popular girls that obviously envied the attention Dawn was getting.

The younger Summers was surprised when just after a few days the principal wanted to see her.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked a little scared. What could have she possibly done during the very first week at school? Nothing that she knew of.

"No, of course not. I just wanted to make sure… Are you really the sister of Buffy Summers? And the daughter of Joyce Summers?"

"Eh… well... yeah, something like that…"

"Something like that?" the principal raised his eyebrows.

"I mean, yes," Dawn corrected herself. Nobody knew her true story and Buffy treated her like her born sister. Dawn had been created from her and Joyce after all.

"That's interesting…"

"What is?"

"Nothing. You can go now."

She walked out of there completely confused with the principal's behavior. She needed to talk about it with her sister…

* * *

When she got back home there was a painful surprise waiting for her – Xander and Giles came back with the armory.

"Are we preparing for the biggest apocalypse there is?" Buffy asked. "Did you steal from the Military Force? What are we gonna do with so many weapons?"

"Don't say it that twice, ok? You never know what can happen. You may even thank us one day!" Xander looked a little offended.

"Buffy…" Dawn started, feeling the need to attract her sister's attention in order to take her mind off Xander. "It's about the principal… He was acting all weird and suspicious today."

"What d'you mean, weird?" Buffy got interested. She was desperate for some job to do after just a few quiet days. She wasn't used to relaxing much.

"He was asking me very strange questions, for example if you were really my sister."

"What? Why?"

"I don't know." She shrugged. "He wouldn't tell. Who knows… maybe he wants to kill me!" The last one obviously was a joke, only Dawn didn't know how ironic that would sound very soon.

"And you just asked me to snoop around a little bit, didn't you?" Buffy looked at her sister with a face that was seying, 'I knew there was something wrong!'

Dawn shrugged again.

"That means yes, then," Buffy said and went to look for Willow.

* * *

She found her where she expected to find her – in her chamber.

"Will, do you have a moment?... You know what? This laptop looks very strange in this room."

"Yeah, Kennedy said the same thing. What d'you want?"

"Information about Dawn's school, as many as you can find."

"Buffy…"

"Dawn asked me!"

"Ok. Right now I'm working on some very important spell, but as soon as I find some time, I'll look it up for you."

"Sure. No problem. Thanks."

* * *

"Dawn, what d'you say for a little trip to the basement?" her new school friend asked and a while after a very handsome guy joined them.

"Nobody was there for like years! Everybody's afraid. They say the basement is hunted… they say that the school is hunted…" He started creating the right mood.

"Oh, shut up, Brad! You're scaring our Dawnie!"

"What's with the school?" Dawn got interested.

"You don't know?"

* * *

"Buffy!" Willow ran to the living room where Buffy was sitting over the plans with Giles and Xander.

"Yes?"

"This school… Gee! Once a month, for a year, one of the students usually disappears!"

"Hmh… a demon?"

"This body which had been found when you and Dawn went there for the first time was the first actual found body but…"

"Killer got sloppy?"

"Exactly. There's also something else."

"What?"

"Those mysterious disappearances started when the school got a new principal… guess when?"

"A year ago? Ok, now I'm even more concerned."

* * *

"It's so dark," Dawn's friends squeaked. "Find some light switch…"

"Here!" Dawn yelled from downstairs while turning on the lights and tripping over something. She looked down and started screaming.

"What happened? What is it?" Brad asked, scared.

There was a hand… sticking out of the ground.

* * *

Buffy answered her phone.

"What is it, Dawnie? Listen… I have…"

"Buffy, I've just found a body in the school basement…"

"And what have you been doing in the school basement, young lady?... I'll be right there!"

* * *

"Dawn Summers!" Dawn heard the principal's voice. "I want to see you in my office. Now!"

"Is it about…"

"Yes… now!"

Dawn went after him and closed the door behind her.

"Why is it so dark in here?" she asked, turning around and immediately started screaming. The windows were darkened and the principal… looked like a demon, half-human, half-demon with something really strange on his face that resembled big blade teeth, his hands were ended with sharp bones.

"You killed all those people!" Dawn yelled.

"Yes, young lady. Now, I'm going to kill you. I don't usually need two bodies in one month but… you are the sister of the Slayer, aren't you? And when your sister comes to rescue you, I'll eat her, too. I will be more powerful than ever before!"

Dawn screamed again and jumped to the door. He was faster though.

In the same time the door opened with a blast and Buffy got inside with a knife in one hand and a stake in another.

"You!" she growled at the principal while pushing Dawn aside to keep her safe. The demon almost scratched her with his strange hands, but she chopped them off.

"Let it be! I'll heal in a moment when I eat you!" the answer came.

She stabbed him in the heart before he manage to do that.

"Never underestimate the force of a stake! What is it with you demons?" She shook her head. "They told me once in the Initiative that I was using an ancient weapon. Hah! And who's laughing now?"

* * *

"That was one of the most unique species of demons! Very similar to a demon who has to transform itself into another body by physical act. Otherwise it decomposes…"

"Argh…" Xander shivered. "Why did you have to tell me that? Knowing my luck… one day it can happen to me!"

"…but this one…" Giles said, looking at Xander with disconcert, "this one had to eat some body parts once a month."

"Yuck…" Buffy shivered. "You see? England's not that safe after all! And if you forbid me to check up your school ever again…" she turned to Dawn.

"Ok! You can check whatever you want! I had enough. I'm going to sleep!"

* * *

Buffy spent almost the whole next day snooping around Dawn's school, but she found nothing.

"They are never there when you want them," she sighed, shrugged and went back home.


	8. Chapter 8 Hunted

**Hunted**

"Buffy…" Willow found her friend. "Here you have the list of the closest slayers." She handed it over. "I think we should start visiting them."

"Ok, there's only one pr… wow!" She looked up the list. "There are…"

"I know… We have 30 names so far."

"Gee, I haven't even expected so many in England and… What about the rest of the world?"

"I'm sure we can't get to the North Pole or China right now... you know… too far and… we would need a translator."

"Yeah…"

"What did you want to say before, you know, this 'wow'?"

"Ah… yeah. How am I gonna proof them that what I'm saying is real before they call a doctor?"

"I can go with you and make some mo-jo."

"Can you create some vampire illusion? Then, I could stake it."

"I would have to practice it first."

"Ok, so start right away."

"Hey!"

"I'm going to a training with Faith so it's not gonna be pleasure for me either."

Buffy passed Andrew on her way.

"Buffy…" he started shyly.

"Do you have a problem, Andrew?"

"At nights… I hear some really weird noises."

"Andrew…" she placed her hand on his shoulder, "don't worry. We're living in a very old castle, you will always hear something disturbing. It's not a ghost, it's just the air, rain, wind. You understand… it's England."

"But… but I'm not sure."

"Ok then, when you hear it again, let me know."

* * *

Buffy suddenly woke up on hearing somebody screaming.

She sat on her bed and rubbed her eyes.

Who was screaming at two o'clock in the morning?

Then she realized… Andrew.

She jumped out of her bed and opened the door. She was just about to walk out into the corridor when…

This time she was the one to scream, because there was no floor underneath her! There was just a big black hole and nothing. Then her leg slipped and she fell…

"Buffy!" she heard Xander's scream and felt that he managed to catch her, so she let him pull her into his room.

"Oh my…" she inhaled deeply while shaking. She landed on him when they both fell onto the floor and now was talking to his neck. "What, the hell, was that?" She stood up.

Xander's breath also fastened.

"Is everything alright?" she asked, eyeing him closely.

"Yeah… yes…"

"Where's the rest? Are they fine?"

"Nobody fell down like you did if that was what you had on your mind."

"Ok. Who was screaming?"

"ME!" she heard a voice.

She looked outside very carefully, this time her legs stayed in Xander's room. It was Andrew's head, so she was right at the beginning.

"Andrew, what exactly happened?" she asked him.

"I heard the same noise again, so I wanted to go get you and… I screamed because there was no floor in the hall!"

"Willow!" Buffy yelled. "Is Giles in his room?"

The room where Willow and Kennedy lived was right next to Giles's.

"No. He's probably spending all night in the library again!"

"Ok. How can I get there?" Buffy asked Xander and he was just about to answer when… "There's something else! Had anybody left their rooms at night since we moved in here?"

"Yes!" Dawn answered. "Me. I wanted to see the castle at night… you know…" she suddenly stopped.

"When was it? And yes, we will talk about the rest later! How could you be so reckless? It's dangerous when you don't know what you can find here!"

"I'm not a kid anymore!" Dawn defended herself. "And it was yesterday night!"

"So if the floor was here yesterday and Andrew heard the noise anyway… Ok, I officially have no idea what to think! Did anybody else hear something?"

Their shook their heads.

"Andrew, this means it's coming from your room. We have to exam it and we also have to dig into the history of this castle!"

"Can I go somewhere else?" Andrew asked in shaky voice.

"No! You stay there!"

"But I'm scared!"

"So… stay at the door and keep talking to someone!... Xander, how can I get to the library without walking out into the corridor?"

"You can… use the window?" he suggested, gesturing towards it.

"Please, tell me that you have a rope."

"I do have a rope!" He smiled broadly. "In my wardrobe."

Buffy looked at him and frowned.

"PJ in… hamburgers?" she asked, trying not to burst into laugh. "How old are you? 16?"

"I'm sorry that I still haven't managed to wash all of my clothes!" He took out the rope from his wardrobe. "Here you go." He tied it up to the wardrobe and then to the bed. "It's safe. We can go."

"We?" Buffy raised her eyebrows.

"You may need my help."

"Xander…"

"Don't argue with me. I'm the one who has some military experience here!"

"I won't be shooting ghost or whatever."

He shrugged.

"After you. I won't stay here alone where the room next door is empty."

"Ok. I'm going down…"


	9. Chapter 9 Well

**Well**

"Finally," Buffy felt relieved, "we're on the ground."

"Why? You thought the house wouldn't let you?" asked Xander, but she didn't answer him.

Suddenly, she heard his scream.

"What is it?" Buffy turned around and saw what he'd seen. A ghost of a little boy. He was heading toward the garden. "Grr… better let's go find Giles."

"Shouldn't we go after him?"

"Who? The ghost? No! Believe me, that's not a very good idea. Some ghost when angry can actually hurt you."

She pulled his sleeve and went toward the main entrance of the castle.

She opened the door and…

"Wait!" Xander yelled and reached for her hand, stopping her.

"What?" She turned anxiously.

"Look at the floor! D'you wanna kill yourself?"

"How…" she started and stopped. There was no floor. Only emptiness. "I've got it!" She pointed at the wall, it was one of those old walls with arches in the middle. "I bet I can go that way."

"Not me," Xander sighed.

"I told you to stay in your room in the first place."

"And who would show you the ghost? Wait… can he come for me here?"

"I don't know. I'll be fast, I promise. Hold on. If something happens just run to the rope and climb up," she squeezed his hand, "and thank you." She looked him in the eye.

"For what?" His voice lost its sharpness.

"It's the second time this night you saved my life… I'll be right back." She climbed up the arch. "Do you think this chandelier will hold if I jump and catch it?" She pointed a big chandelier at the ceiling right next to the door to the library.

"'Don't think so. It's a solid job, it should hold."

"Thanks."

"Wait." He tied her up to the rope he was carrying. "Just in case."

"Thank you." And she was gone.

She managed to stay on the arches and then jumped. For a moment Xander held his breath, clenching his hands on the rope, using all his force, but Buffy managed to land on the chandelier with no problems and then she jumped to the library. Fortunately, there was a floor up there, maybe it didn't disappear because of Giles's presence, he thought.

Buffy burst through the door with a great fuss.

Giles was sleeping with his head on some book and woke up with a scream.

"Giles!" she yelled. "I need your help!" She told him everything he needed to know without even missing the ghost outside and Giles did everything he could to clear his mind. He was still sleepy as brutally awoken.

"It looks like… hmm… this boy probably died in this castle and now he's wandering round."

"You think?" she asked sarcastically. "Do you have any books about the history of this castle? I need concrete facts."

"I was actually… just looking through it." He took the book he'd fallen asleep on.

"That's it!" Buffy yelled. "It's all your fault!"

"What?" he rubbed his eyes, clearly not getting her point.

"You did it because you started digging in the history."

"Maybe you could come in?"

"I can't. The rope's too short," she said looking at her waist, standing just in the door.

"Oh… right then… I was looking through the history of the family that used to live here a long time ago… oh!" he exclaimed suddenly.

"What?"

"I know why they moved out and left this castle… oh…"

"WHAT?!"

"They had a son. He was 10 when he fell down the well and… died from severe head injuries."

"That's our ghost! It has to be him! Ok, how can we get rid of him?"

"I think that destroying this…" he said, lifting the book a little bit, "should help. It's not an ordinary book. It also full of enchantments, quite dangerous if you ask me. Nobody should see them."

"You think? Giles! We have to know for sure!"

"I can't tell you anything more, Buffy."

"Is that well still here?"

"I'm sure it is."

"Ok, just give me the book and some lighter."

Giles did what she'd asked for.

"Now, back to the chandelier…" Buffy said and… he heard her screaming.

"Buffy!" he yelled but didn't manage to catch her. She fell…

Xander felt the rope straining and clenched it even harder. It worked. He had her.

Giles was relieved when he saw him.

"Do you have her?!"

"I've got her!"

"Good!"

Buffy was falling and falling… and at last she was stopped. Xander just saved her life again. How could she repay him?

She felt humidity and everything was clear for her now!

Xander pulled her out and reached his hand to her.

"Uh…" Buffy sighed. "That's the third time you saved me." She kissed him in the cheek. "Thank you."

Xander was happy that it was dark because she couldn't notice his blush.

"You're welcome. Now, I'll never hear 'stay in your room' again, hah?"

"No, you won't." She winked at him. "Ok, I know what it is," she pointed the emptiness. "It's a gigantic well!" She raised her voice, so Giles could hear it, too. "At the bottom there's probably water, but all I felt was humidity. It has to be really deep."

"Do you know what to do now?... Let's go then!"

Buffy led Xander to the garden where she expected to find the well.

"Damn… let's cover it up with something." She looked inside. "Wow!" She got scared when the ghost jumped out of it and flew up. Suddenly, some strange force pulled her and Xander down…

Xander held Buffy with his one hand and caught the rim of the well with the other. She did it, too.

"Now I would manage by myself," she said when he let go off her. She took the book along with the lighter and lit up the cover. Then she threw it all to the well. They heard the ghost moaning in the distance. Right after that he suddenly appeared just in front of them, so they could see that his forehead was covered in blood.

"Poor kid." Buffy shivered, holding Xander's hand.

"Yes," he said squeezing her hand a little. "It's terrifying, isn't it? His parents…" he stopped when the ghost suddenly disappeared in the air. He was free. "So, what is actually in Andrew's room?"

"Probably the boy had lived there before he died."

"Good explanation. but if Andrew wants to switch rooms…"

"Relax. The room isn't hunted and this is exactly what I'll tell him. Take it…" she changed the subject and pointed the cover of the well.

"Gee, it's so heavy!"

Buffy laughed and helped him. Together they covered it up.

Xander didn't comment the fact that she had to help him, neither did she.

They came back to their rooms the normal way, through the front door and the corridor.

"Is it over?" Giles asked, sticking his head out the library and stamping carefully on the floor in the hall.

"Yes, Giles! You can see the floor, right?" Buffy smiled. "Everything's back to normal."

"Yes, I see… but…"

They laughed and headed upstairs.

"What happened?"

Everybody was curious so instead of going back to sleep they all crammed in the kitchen. Willow made hot cocoas – thanks to magic they were ready in a blast.

Buffy and Xander told them the whole story.

"But I wonder…" Buffy started. "Why the well was uncovered?"

"Eh…" Dawn said carefully. "I…"

"You what?"

"I wanted to see what was down there and…"

Buffy got mad.

"Dawn! Do you know what happened to that boy?! Haven't you seen a well in your entire life?!"

"But… it could've been empty… or filled with something… you never know…"

Buffy just shook her head.

"It looks like we'll never know what was the real cause. It could be Andrew, Giles or Dawn. I think more likely… Dawn… but we do know what stopped it. Burning that book freed that poor boy…"


	10. Chapter 10 Vampires & Werewolves

**A/B **Thank you so much for your reviews!

* * *

**Vampires & Werewolves**

In the next couple of weeks the Scooby Gang was very busy with their trips to different parts of Europe to see the slayers.

Willow did a great job in finding them, she was getting better and better every day.

When they came back to the castle they all were so tired that they just went to the living room and fell on the couch.

"I'm more exhausted than after some apocalypse," Buffy sighed. "Who would think that it could be so..."

"Hey!" Willow bridled. "All you had to do was tell them about you, explain the job and slay a vampire who wasn't even real! I had to create it while using a magical illusion! I had to be focused all the time!"

"Ok," Buffy raised her hands in surrender. "I'm sorry, but…" she didn't finish because she started yawing.

"Buffy!" she heard Dawn's happy voice. She just came back from school and ran to greet her family. "You have no idea how bored I was here with Andrew!"

Poor Andrew, Buffy thought, she was sure that he liked her sister more than he supposed to, but she was happy anyway that Dawn's obsession with Xander passed.

"How's school?"

"Alright…" Dawn shrugged. "Tell me how it went with you, guys!"

"Only about 15 slayers wanted to come here for training, the rest… well… they have their own lives, so we can't blame them, but they promised that they would come in case of an emergency," Giles explained.

"So… where are the slayers that wanted to come with you?" Dawn asked, looking around.

"They'll be here soon, Dawnie," Xander answered.

"Where's Andrew?" Buffy asked, followed by another yawn.

"Maybe I'll make some coffee?" Kennedy suggested.

In the same time somebody started screaming outside.

They all jumped to their feet and ran out of the castle.

It was Andrew surrounded by five vampires.

Buffy reacted immediately, reaching for her stake and attacking the intruders.

"The Slayer…" one of them said. "The war is coming. The apocalypse you have never seen before…"

"I think you have no idea what I've seen," she said and tried to stake him, but he ran. "Coward!" she yelled after him.

"We'll see about that war!" he shouted back and disappeared.

She managed to stake the rest of the remaining vampires.

"Everything's ok, Andrew?" She turned to her friend and he nodded. "Remember to always carry your stakes with you when you leave the house, just in case.," she turned to the rest. "Giles, do you think that…" She didn't finish because something hairy jumped out of the bushes and then another one after… werewolves. "Oz?" Buffy asked Willow.

"No," Willow answered quickly. "I would recognize him. None of them is Oz."

Xander and Giles reached for their weapens – a knife and a crossbow.

Buffy managed to twist one of the werewolves' neck while Xander killed the other one with an arrow.

"Jeez! What is that? Can't I rest those days?"

"Can I remind you that a few weeks earlier you were complaining that you were bored?" Xander asked ironically.

"Ah…" Buffy moaned and everybody came back to the castle.

* * *

"Apocalypse…" Giles was thinking over the cup of hot tea. "The worst one… but… for me there is nothing worse than the First."

"You know vampires, they're always exaggerating, they just want to sound good." Buffy didn't care too much.

"This one was quite serious. In his opinion it will be the worst one."

"We don't even know what he was talking about!" Xander spoke. "It can be a rain of meteorites or some goddess in human form…"

"Xander, we've already been there," Willow noticed. "They won't repeat it, they'll try something new."

"Or… maybe they're creating an army of werewolves and vampires?" Dawn guessed.

"Everything's possible."

"So it's the usual. We don't know anything and we're nowhere!" Buffy summed up. "I don't know about you guys, but this coffee didn't help me, so I'm gonna hit the sack!"


	11. Chapter 11 Night Guests

**night guests**

Buffy slew a couple more vampires in the next few days.

"Giles, the worst thing is that I think they're getting stronger," she said. "Not that I can't beat them, just…" she added quickly.

"Relax, we all know what you wanna say, Buff," Xander grinned.

Suddenly, something strange happened. It was a sunny and beautiful day, what was quite exquisite in England, and in one moment the sun was completely covered by clouds. They heard a thunder and it started raining. The wind became so strong that they heard it moaning through the walls.

"Giles…" Faith started, she showed up in the living room today what was surprising because she'd been spending all her nights in bars and discos and sleeping mostly during the day. She'd been saying that it was England after all, nobody didn't even notice her absence and they didn't need her at this time anyway. Buffy managed on her own and it didn't matter how strong those vampires were. "I'm no expert on English weather, but I think that something strange or... magical happened out there," she finished.

"Magical!" Willow opened her eyes widely and smiled. "It must be another witch!" she exclaimed happily.

"Yeah and she's sending us the bad weather as a welcome gift to poof that she's on our side," Xander added sarcastically.

"He's right," Kennedy admitted. "She can't be friendly."

Willow lost her enthusiasm.

"You guys are probably right… She's working for them," she sulked.

"It's getting pretty serious," Giles said. "Very serious, indeed. If we have to fight against a gang of vampires, werewolves and witches, then we are in serious trouble."

"But I can deal with her!" Willow contradicted. "Look!" Suddenly, the hurricane stopped and the sun was shining again.

"Yes, just keep changing the weather!" Giles exclaimed. "Nobody will even notice!"

"Don't worry, Giles," Willow turned to him. "I did it only over our castle."

"Even better! Let everybody know that we have a witch in here!"

"I'm joking!" Willow laughed. "I got rid of the previous spell."

"Ok, what if there are more of them? More than Willow can handle at a time?" Buffy asked, seriously disturbed.

"We have to handle them!" Giles contradicted.

"Can I go now?" Faith asked, bored.

"No," Giles shook his head. "Faith, I think it will be better if you stay here tonight. We may need you."

"You have the whole bunch of new slayers who came here a few days ago. You don't need one more!"

"You and Buffy are the best. It doesn't matter that we have more. You two are in this longer," he cut her off, "and you are well-trained. If it gets better, then you'll do whatever you want."

"Faith, so maybe for a change you should go for a patrol tonight?" Buffy winked at her.

Faith sighed, grabbed a stake and walked out of the castle.

Buffy went to the back of the building, then outside on the porch. She sat on the stairs and looked in the distance, thinking.

She felt lonely. She couldn't deny it anymore and yet, every single one of her relationships hadn't succeeded.

"Hey, there," she heard Xander's voice behind her. "What are you doing here all alone?"

"Thinking," she answered.

"Really?" he asked, sitting next to her. "About what?"

"This time about myself. Strange, isn't it? I haven't been thinking about my own private life for a long time now… wait, come back, I don't have a private life!"

"I'm sure it'll get better."

"No, it won't. Listen… I need someone whom I wouldn't have to lie to. Someone who will love me for me, even when he hears my whole story without lies and understatements and after that… someone who doesn't run away and doesn't start to compare himself to my previous boyfriends. You remember Riley, when he found out about Angel… I wouldn't stand some new relationship with someone I couldn't be one hundred percent honest with. Where can I find such a guy? I need someone who would be my best friend in the same time…" Buffy stopped wrinkling her forehead and inhaling the air noisily. She looked in Xander's eye.

"Maybe someone who's been there the whole time and you haven't even noticed him?" Xander finally dared to say.

"Xander…" she whispered.

They got closer to each other and then, they lips touched for a little while.

"I'm sorry, I know you said 'no' in high school, but…" They looked each other in the eyes and got closer again. They were both surprised with the feelings they had toward each other at this moment. They kissed again, this time more boldly.

"I can't believe it!" they suddenly heard Dawn's voice and jumped from each other, looking at her standing in the door. There were tears in her eyes. "Buffy, how could you?! Is that why you said all those things to me before?! So YOU could have him?!"

"No, Dawn, it's not like that… I…" Buffy and Xander stood up in the same moment. Buffy reached her hand to Dawn. Xander didn't dare to look at either of them.

"Giles wanted me to tell you that dinner's ready, but I think I interrupted something important!"

"Dawn!" Buffy ran after her and finally caught her by the stairs in the hall.

"Listen to me! I'm sorry! It just happened! I would've never thought…"

Xander went inside slowly and he was just about to walk into the kitchen when someone knocked on the door. He went to open it instead.

What a fantastic sense of time! He thought bitterly. Just when something happened between him and Buffy!

"You couldn't choose a better moment…" he said to Angel sarcastically without even saying 'hallo' and left the door opened.

"Dawn, I…"

"Buffy…"

"Please, listen to me…"

"No. Buffy." Dawn pointed the door.

Buffy turned around, seeing Angel.

For the first time in her life she didn't know what to do in his presence. She couldn't jump to him, hug him and just forget about everything that had just happened. She looked at Xander, he looked at her back with obvious pain in his eye, then she looked at Angel… at Faith…

"Wow!" Scooby Gang jumped out of the kitchen. "Angel!"

"It's not the end," Angel added.

"You two can go inside," Faith said.

"You TWO?" Willow asked a little surprised.

Angel and Faith went inside and…

…after them, there was Spike.


	12. Chapter 12 Three of Them

**three of them**

"SPIKE?" Xander raised his voice. "Even better! We're missing only Riley! Riley, are you there somewhere?!" Sarcasm evident in his voice.

"What's up with him?" Spike asked, looking at Xander, so did Angel.

"Wait… you and Buffy?" Angel was shocked. He looked at Xander again, then at Buffy and back at Xander.

Buffy was still standing in the same place, right next to Dawn who was still in shock to see Spike alive.

"SPIKE?" Now, Buffy was the one to yell. "Spike…" she whispered. "Spike…" It wasn't that she wanted to run to him and thrust herself into his arms or kiss him. It wasn't that. It never was. What they had was only physical. "But how?"

Xander looked down.

Willow and Giles were looking at the three men and Buffy, also shocked.

Xander moved first, he went toward the cellar door, leaving the front door open, so Faith was the one to close it. He just wanted to leave this place, he passed by Willow and Giles.

"Xander…" Willow whispered looking at him strangely and suddenly, she understood. "Xander…" she said even quieter with compassion in her voice. She'd heard something when Dawn and Buffy had been arguing.

"No way… wow…" Faith said. "Buff and Xander? Heh, now two exes came back, nice, a little action in this boring…"

"Faith," Buffy stopped her in a sharp voice while avoiding the boys' eyes. "Could somebody, please, explain to me why Spike is alive?" she asked, trying to sound normal. She wanted to hide all of her emotions, but it was too much. Xander - she felt something, something that shouldn't even be there! Angel – there was no need for explanation and… Spike was alive?

"Maybe we could all sit down?" Angel suggested. "It's complicated."

"Bullshit," Spike snorted and made one step forward. "Somebody sent the locket back to Angel, Angel opened the packet and there I was. I jumped out of it. I was kind of a ghost for a while, but then everything came back to normal. Hey, honey! I missed ya!" He made his way to Buffy, spreading his arms. Buffy didn't object and hugged him, she couldn't restrain herself any longer. She'd been suffering after his death after all, hadn't she? She closed her eyes and inhaled.

"I'm glad," she whispered, moving back.

Xander disappeared. Willow couldn't stop him this time. He went to the cellar to his stock of weapons and hit the table with his fist. It did hurt.

"When… when did you come back?" Buffy asked.

"Eh… some… time ago…?" Spike hesitated.

"Excuse me? Angel! Was that the thing you wanted to tell me? And it didn't concern me?"

"No, that was something else," he answered while still not been able to understand… Buffy and Xander? When had this happened? Or maybe it had just happened, because their friends were also surprised.

"It was me!" Spike raised his hands. "I was the one who didn't want to tell you," he admitted.

"Excuse me?" Buffy repeated, even more shocked.

"WHAT?!" Dawn yelled at him. "Not only Buffy was missing you, you know!"

"Why would I come back? You didn't love me anyway! And… you would've remembered me as a hero, as a champion who sacrificed himself for all of you!"

"So… you were looking for glory?" Buffy asked sarcastically. "I had the right to know!" she growled at him. "I missed you! When I thought you were dead, you were simply walking around LA, having fun!"

"Calm down, everybody!" Angel exclaimed. "It would be really nice if we could just sit down. I have a very important news. Something is coming…"

"The Apocalypse," Buffy said.

"How do you know that?"

"What else could it be?"

They finally got to the living room.

"Ok, what is it?"

"The darkest powers of this world have united to fight the slayers," he said.

"But… it's not the First Evil, right?"

"No. I think it's not. I'm talking about vampires, witches, werewolves and demons. All together."

"But... why?" Willow asked.

"Because Buffy changed the history. She made more slayers. There are thousands of them now. The one can't be in a couple of places at the same time, but…"

"Good Lord," Giles said and started cleaning up his glasses.

"Exactly. Everybody will attack us, they want to kill as many slayers as they can."

"But then the new ones will come," Buffy said.

"Not until they will be born," Giles corrected, putting his glasses back on.

"Gee…" Buffy whispered.

"What's the big deal?" Faith asked. "We'll kick their asses!"

"We'll have to fight witches!" Angel reminded her.

"Willow's one. She can manage."

"I am _one_ witch… I… I can't fight them all!" Willow stammered.

"And the one thing I wanted to tell you, Buffy," Angel started. "I discovered something, I needed to be sure first, but it look like this is _the_ battle."

"What is it?"

"There is a prophecy… I… I'm going to be human again."

"What?!" Giles spoke first. "How is that even possible?"

"If I fight well and after all, if I survive… I will be human again. It will be the reward for all I've done for the good side. Everything thanks to my soul."

"Wait a moment… Spike has a soul, too," Dawn noticed.

"It refers to me only. I checked it," Angel added.

"Oh…" Buffy whispered.

"Whatever…" Spike lit up a cigarette. "Humanity isn't for me anyway. It doesn't suit me. If I were a human… this smoke would kill me." He inhaled deeply.

Buffy didn't love him and he knew it, so why he would want to be a human? Immortality sounded much better.

"I need… I need some air," Buffy said and walked out of there.

"I'll see how's Xander doing… I'll tell him…" Willow disappeared in the cellar.


	13. Chapter 13 Dilemmas

**Dilemmas**

Buffy was standing on the porch, hugging herself. She was looking blindly into the horizon.

"Are you cold?" she heard Angel's voice right behind her and shivered.

She turned around quickly. He took off his jacket and handed it over to her.

"What about you?" she asked.

"Cold doesn't bother me."

"Right… I forgot…" she sighed.

"So…" Angel hesitated. "You and Xander?"

Buffy sighed again.

"Angel… I…" she looked at him and stopped.

"It's alright. I never expected you to wait for me."

"It's not like that. I wanted to wait, but we'd got to face the truth that we didn't have any future ahead of us."

"You finally grew up to that decision… only…"

"A little bit too late? Wait… you… a human… you don't even know how much it confuses me right know."

"It gave me hope. I've learnt that there is no impossible in this world."

"Yeah, almost like there are no rules. Just look at me, I've died two times and I'm still here."

"It's a lame joke."

"I'm sorry, I'm not in the mood right now."

"Can you answer one question…"

"I can't," she interrupted him quickly. "Angel… I don't know anything right now. I won't lie to you that I haven't felt anything for Xander, because I have and I won't lie to you that I don't care about Spike… those are two completely different things. You were my first love, Spike was an adventure and Xander is my best friend who was always there for me when I needed him the most and I never thought about him differently until tonight. I'm confused and I'm sure I won't figure everything out today… We're facing another apocalypse, so right now this is the most important thing on my mind. The battle. Every single one of us can die."

"Do you love him?" Angel suddenly asked. "Do you love Xander?"

"I don't know," she admitted honestly.

"You know… about Spike… I wouldn't worry about him," he said. "He didn't tell you he was alive, because he knew that you wouldn't love him back. He finally understood that the best way to heal a broken heart is to just stay in the distance and… I still think he has feelings for Fred."

"Who's Fred?"

"A friend. It's a long and tragic story actually. She died and changed into this ancient goddess, but we managed to brought her back. Right now it's like there are two people in her body, but they both feel what Fred feels. She's with Wesley. He almost died, too, but his death kind of bring Fred back permanently and kept him alive until help came."

"Wow… it really is a beautiful story. And nobody came with you to help? What about Cordelia?"

Angel's face changed.

"Oh my God," Buffy whispered. "What happened?"

"She's dead," he sighed. "I couldn't save her."

"Angel. It's not your fault. You can't save everybody."

Another sigh. Buffy got closer to him and gave him a hug.

"And how will you react when you find out that I have a son?" he asked.

"WHAT?!

* * *

Willow went to the basement.

"Xander?... Xander?"

He was there, around his stock of weapons.

"Xander… is everything alright?"

He didn't answer. He just kept reorganizing everything.

Willow came over to him and put her hand on his to stop him.

"Xander! Look at me!"

He was holding one of his riffles.

"What?" he asked sharply and turned to her but kept avoiding her eyes.

"When were you going to tell me?" she asked.

He didn't answer.

"Xander, it's serious. When were you going to tell me that you still love Buffy?"

"I don't know," he said and sighed. "I didn't even realize it until…"

"Say it. I'm here for you. You'll feel better," she encouraged him and put her hand on his shoulder. "I won't judge you. You're talking to a person who almost destroyed the world."

He laughed, but stopped immediately.

"When Anya died… I wasn't in any relationship anymore, I wasn't blinded by any other feelings… then… when we came here… I think…"

"Oh…" Willow whispered. "Don't worry. It doesn't mean that you don't have any respect for Anya."

"It's not that, Will. Anya and I were from two different worlds. Of course I loved her, but it was a different kind of love, not the one I feel for Buffy… But I still loved her… I… chickened out, ok? I didn't get married, because I knew that our families would never be ok with this. A serious relationship with an ex demon? What was I thinking?"

"Relax. You can have a normal relationship with Buffy. You kissed, that's something, right?"

"Yeah, right after two vampires she…" he stopped. "I don't even want to think about it! Willow, you know how humiliating it is when you realize that a woman prefers dead men over you? Dead men who are not even breathing! Even Spike!"

"Buffy doesn't love Spike. She never actually loved him."

Xander snorted.

"She kissed you, Xander. And she did it, because she wanted to," Willow insisted.

"And she's already forgotten about this, because The Mister Number One is back."

"If it really was like you're saying, she would hug him and kiss him. She didn't even hug him, Xander!" Willow noticed. "What is a good think."

"Great," he snorted.

"Don't give up, that's my advice. Don't give up, because you never know, maybe you'll even succeed."

"Yeah, right. If Angel becomes a human Buffy will forget about me as quick as she thought that Dawn is her real sister."

"Xander…"

"Willow, I'll manage!" he growled and pushed her away, closing himself off.

* * *

Buffy stayed alone for a moment.

She told Angel to call everybody. The news: Corelia's death, Angel's son (she was still adjusting to that fact. Angel would be a human and then what? If she stayed with him, it would be like a relationship with a divorced man who had a child…).

"Buffy…" she heard Spike's voice.

"Please, don't make me feel any worse than I already do," she opposed.

"It's not my intention." He raised his hands in surrender. "Listen, I think I'm over you. You know… You never really wanted me anyway…"

"Fred, hah? Great name for a girl."

"Actually, it's an abb from Winifred, but she's taken anyway."

"I know."

"You said you loved me just before…"

"Yes, I did, because I felt it in that very moment. You'd done so much for me… You'd gotten your soul back, you'd wanted to change, you'd taken care of Dawn and finally, you sacrificed yourself for all of us."

"But now... there's nothing in your heart, is it?"

She looked down.

"It's alright. I knew it a long time ago."

"Thank you." She turned to him. "Thank you for being there for me, just before the battle, when I needed you the most."

"Especially during the nights, hah?" he laughed.

She laughed, too, when knowing it was a joke.


	14. Chapter 14 Feelings

**feelings**

"Xander? Willow?" Kennedy looked into the cellar. "Another meeting. Obviously there's something important we don't know yet."

They both sighed and followed her upstairs.

Xander was scared of another encounter with Buffy. He was scared of what he might've seen in her eyes and above all, he was scared of seeing there one particular thing: _mistake_.

Everybody gathered in the living room again.

"What is the matter?" Giles asked, looking like a leader since he was the only one standing.

"Angel missed some pretty important stuff. They have nothing to do with the war that's coming, but I'm sure you would all like to know," Buffy said. "First of all… Cordelia's dead."

"Good Lord…" Giles sighed, taking off his glasses.

Everybody was looking at Buffy, stunned. Xander's face was pale. He didn't have any feelings toward Cordelia anymore, but he had been the closest one to her in high school.

"God," Willow whispered. "I would've never thought that I would actually miss her."

"Yeah…" Buffy sighed. "Second of all… hmm… Angel has a son. The mother is Darla."

"WHAT?!" Giles put his glasses back on. "THE Darla? But… she's dead!"

"Actually…" Angel started explaining it all.

"Dear Lord…"

Willow rubbed Xander's arm. Was that supposed to mean: _good for you_? He thought. Then they heard something. Another thunder, rain and storm.

"Oh, no!" Willow growled. "Enough!" She waved her hands and everything stopped.

Buffy got angry and ran outside. Everybody else followed her. They looked around, but there was no one there.

"Maybe there's no…" Xander started and…

"XANDER!" Buffy screamed and a second after that he was on the ground. He discovered that there was an arrow floating in his direction, but Buffy ran to him and they both fell down to the ground. Now she was lying on him. They looked each other in the eyes and stood up immediately.

"Thank God, I made it," she whispered, turning her face away from him. She was scared of what she might do if she looked at him a little bit longer.

She turned toward the bushes where the arrow had come from, but no one was there. Whoever it was - was already gone.

"Shit!" she growled."'We still don't know who it is!"

"Willow, maybe you shouldn't react so quickly? It could've aggravated them…" Giles started.

"Giles, I really appreciate your concern, but I can control myself now," she said with no insincerity or angriness in her voice. "I'm only afraid that during the battle I wouldn't be able to do anything else than keep fighting the atmosphere. I think those witches want to avoid the sun as they might have vampires in their army."

"We'll see, but we have vampires, too," Buffy said. "Let's go inside. Willow, can you throw some protective spells over our area?"

"Sure. I should've done it earlier!"

She disappeared inside the castle and went to the library. Giles followed her.

"Giles, I'll be perfectly alright," she reassured him.

"I know, but I thought you could do with some help," he said.

They smiled to each other.

"Come here and look at those ingredients…"

* * *

Buffy sent Angel and Spike to the cellar and gave them two foldaway beds. They actually had a lot of them prepared for the slayers.

"Oh," she remembered. "We have to send messages to the others!... Dawn, what are you still doing here? Go to sleep! You have school tomorrow!... It's almost dawn…"

"Maybe I could miss my classes today? You know, it's lame anyway…" Dawn asked.

"Oh, no! I wasn't the one who told you not to sleep!"

"But there were so many exciting…"

"Dawn!"

"Ok, ok," she sighed. "But if I fall asleep during classes and bring a note from school…"

"Just go."

Kennedy and Faith were already gone and Buffy found herself alone in the room with Xander.

"Xander…" she hesitated and sat on the couch, "I…"

"Let me be the one speaking," he said. He had to show some courage. He might not get another chance. Willow was right, he couldn't just give up. "Listen…" He sat right next to her and looked her in the eye. She lost countenance but remained strong. "I love you," he told her.

Buffy was just about to say something when, "Let me finish," he asked. "Let me finish and then you can do or say whatever you want and I will listen… I loved you in high school, but you already know about that and later when you… rejected me… I closed my heart for you. You were right when you said that Anya was convenient for me, but it was like that only in the beginning. I fell in love with her later on and you know how much I defended her when you wanted to kill her…" he sighed heavily. "It was all my fault, right? I was the one who left her. Why did I do that? I was scared. I was scared that our marriage wouldn't work out. What was I thinking? I wanted to marry an ex-demon! Our family would've never understood each other, they would've never even liked each other… Sometimes love just isn't enough… When she died… I couldn't deny my feelings… they all just came back twice stronger… and I'm talking about my feelings for you. I know that I don't have any chance with you when Angel's back and he's gonna be human. Even if he has a son, I'm still not enough for you… but I won't give up, Buffy. I can't. I will fight for you, I know I will lose, but I will fight anyway, because I don't want to regret anything… Ok, that's all I wanted to say."

There was silence. He looked down, maybe being a little embarrassed that he just exposed himself to her like that.

"Just for the record…" Buffy started, "Xander, when we kissed… I did feel something and it was real. It was something I would've never expected to be there. I saw you in a completely different light and I'm still seeing you differently right now, but I don't have the time to think about feelings. There's a great battle on the horizon and it can be as difficult as the previous one and… we have to focus on it. Until that time… let's not change anything between us."

"Alrighty," he said slowly. "Uff… I'm relieved… It wasn't just 'no' after all." He smiled.

"And now, let me go to sleep. I'm exhausted," she said, pat his knee and stood up. She went upstairs and he followed her. They reached their rooms in silence.

"Good night," he said quietly.

"Good night," she repeated and walked into the room.

When Xander laid on his bed, he smiled…


	15. Chapter 15 Preparations

**preparations**

"Ok, security spell's done!" Willow happily informed Buffy.

"Thank you."

"Thank Giles, he did a lot of work, too! If it wasn't for him it would take me twice as long. Now I'm going to start thinking what to do to make myself useful in the battle… Buffy?" Willow asked after a short pause.

"Don't! Don't even ask me about this!"

"Hey, I didn't want to interview you. I just wanted to ask about Xander?"

"And that's exactly what I had on mind! I told everybody that I don't have time to think about my private life right now! When we survive apocalypse… I will then."

"You know… with that attitude you may not get the chance to tell the right person what you actually feel," Willow said and went away.

She left Buffy in the living room with a strange face, making her realize that one important factor.

* * *

"So this Buffy girl is their leader?" Kendra, the leader of the witches, asked. She was the one who'd initiated the war and she was also the most powerful of all united witches. "Hmm… we need a good plan…"

Right next to her there were leaders of vampires, werewolves and a couple of demons.

"Maybe we should hit the person she loves most," the werewolf suggested.

"Bingo! We just have to find out who it is!" Kendra voiced her appreciation. "Can you do this?" She turned to him. "You can hide and she won't notice you. I don't want to waste my powers for transmutation, I need to be at my best during the battle!"

"Consider it done."

"And in the meantime… I'll show them our strength!" Kendra chose one creature form every species and sent them to the castle.

* * *

Buffy heard the magical alarm – the security spell that Willow had cast – and right after that Dawn screamed.

The older Summers ran out of the castle along with Xander. They looked at each other and then Willow appeared.

"They're coming! It's not an army, but something's coming!" she warned them.

A couple of slayers came out of the castle as well.

"When the new ones will come?" Buffy asked. "I thought we sent for them a long time ago!"

"They should be here within days," Giles gave her the answer.

Kendra with her sidekicks reached the place.

"So you are the famous slayer?" she asked.

Angel, Spike and Faith appeared.

_Good, sun set,_ Buffy thought, but right after that she noticed that her opponent had vampires on her side, too.

"And you are…?"

"Kendra, the strongest witch. I'm the one who collected this army."

"Well… we'll collect our own."

"We'll see." She spread her arms in obvious signal to attack. Her sidekicks rushed toward the Scooby Gang.

Angel, Spike, Buffy and Faith were ready to fight.

Willow noticed that Kendra was running away, so she spoke some incantation and Kendra collapsed tied up, but she was immediately back on her feet with no ropes around her.

"You are the witch here, I see." She sent Willow a look full of disdain. "I want you to know that you don't stand the slightest chance with me."

"We'll see," Willow said, not showing off any weakness and Kendra turned around and disappeared. Willow started casting spells on the enemies.

The other slayers were already fighting at Buffy's side.

Some vampire got closer to Dawn.

"DAWN!" Buffy screamed, but in this very moment she was attacked by a very nasty and strong demon. Faith rushed to help her, but there was no way Buffy could get to Dawn in time.

It was Xander who reached for his stake and jumped to her sister, then the vampire grasped his neck, wanting to bite him.

"XANDER!" Buffy roared, still fighting with her demon. He was so strong…

Fortunately, Spike staked the vampire and Xander was fine. He took Dawn to the castle immediately and Buffy was glad that he was smart enough not to play a hero right now.

The rest of Kendra's army flied when they realized that Buffy had the advantage.

And the werewolf rushed to his witch…

* * *

Buffy walked into the castle and jumped to Xander and Dawn. They were sitting on the couch, both exhausted.

"Is everything alright?" She placed her hand on Dawn's arm and then looked at Xander for a moment.

"Yes," they both answered.

"You really scared me," she told her sister, but she didn't mention what she'd felt when she'd thought that she could've lost one of them…

_Don't I know the answer already?_ She thought.

* * *

"The leader Slayer was terrified when our vampire… unfortunately, he's dead now…" Kendra didn't care, she just wanted to hear the rest. She had enough vampires, one less didn't make a difference, "she was terrified when her sister was in danger and then this boy with dark hair, wide arms and eye patch, she called him Xander, probably an abbreviation from Alexander."

"And that's it? You think that they're the two closest people to her? I'm sure if that was another slayer she would react the same way! We have to have something more valid than this! If we don't find the right guy we'll take her sister, but until then… keep looking!"


	16. Chapter 16 The Choice

**the choice**

Buffy was so confused and busy. Strategic plans – Xander was supposed to take care of them; defense plans – Willow; slayers – Giles was calling them. Buffy had to train with the others and beside that there was no much to do, but she felt busy and tired all the time anyway. She didn't even let Dawn go to school, because she was too scared for her. Fortunately, it was Friday and she hoped that everything would end until Monday. The full moon was close after all and if Kendra had werewolves…

Buffy felt exhausted, so she went to her room a little bit earlier that evening. She started to think intensively. Willow was right. The decision would have to be made. She would feel a lot better if she decided who she really wanted in her life. The main problem was the she'd already known it, in the deepness of her heart she knew, but couldn't face it. How could she do something like that to him? How would _he_ bear it?

She didn't even notice when she'd fallen asleep.

_She found herself right next to Angel while holding a sword in her hand. He just regained his soul, but it was already too late… the portal was open, she had to kill him…_

_So she told him that she loved him, kissed him and stabbed him..._

_Then she found herself in the Magic Box, Anya and Giles's shop. Anya was still alive, she was sitting next to Xander, they were still happy._

_"Don't tell me to kill my sister," Buffy said to Giles, "you can't. If the world ends, fine, if Dawn has to die, so the last thing she'll see it's me protecting her."_

_She didn't kill Dawn although the situation was so similar to that one with Angel. She'd killed him to prevent the apocalypse while loving him so much. She would never kill her sister, because it was her sister. She couldn't watch her eyes in this very moment and she'd watched Angel's eyes when she'd been killing him…_

_Would she kill Spike if he was the one? The answer was clear, even after all this time..._

_Would she kill Xander if that was him instead of Dawn? _She shivered in her dream.

Then the real nightmares started.

_Xander was even worse than Willow when she'd wanted to destroy the world. He didn't lose anybody, he just became a villain, because he wanted to. He didn't care about Buffy, Willow, Dawn, Giles… about anybody._

_"Buffy, we have to do something…" Willow was crying, she took her by her shoulders and shook her. "We cannot leave him!"_

_"Willow… he'll kill us all! He tried to kill Dawn!" Buffy growled at her. "There's nothing more I can do. He won't listen!"_

_Suddenly, she found herself right next to him. His face awful as he was smirking at her and... she stabbed him with the dagger… he fell down on the ground… but only to become himself again…_

_"Buffy…" he stammered, "what are you…" and then he died._

Something started rumbling…

Buffy woke up with a scream.

"Buffy! Is everything alright?" Willow ran into her room. "I was just knocking to your door. Why were you screaming?"

"Nightmare," she said, still shivering a little. "Oh God." She placed her hands on her head.

"I think you've just realized who you really love," Willow said.

"There was never a decision to make. I knew since… since… when the three of them were there in the hall, but… I was so scared. Willow, how can I tell him the truth?" Buffy asked with tears in her eyes. "So many years… he's been waiting…"

"Buffy, it will be alright."

"No! It won't! It'll break his heart!"

"He can take it as always. You just have to be honest with yourself. He knew all your previous boyfriends and…"

"This is something different than just a temporary romance! It's for life… I think…"

"I know."

"You don't even know whom I'm talking about."

"I know. Believe me. I see the way you look at him."

"Will…"

"Ssshhh… can we talk about something else? I have a great idea! Do you remember when me and Tara…" she stopped for a while, "we were working on a spell that was supposed to create sun balls? We could thrust them into vampires. I mean, I could."

"Willow, Spike and Angel will be there, too."

"I know, that's why I think I'll hide on the roof and I'll be thrusting it from there. What do you think?"

"Are you sure you can do this? It will be very helpful, thanks."

"I'm sure… And remember my vampire illusion?"

"Yeah…"

"I've been thinking I can do more… a whole army… it'll tire the enemy."

"Brilliant! Work on that." Buffy yawned.

"Ok, I'll leave you now, so you could rest. Do you want a hot cocoa?" She waved her hand and a mug appeared in it. She handed it to Buffy.

"Thanks. And you took it from…?"

"From the kitchen," Willow smiled. "Dawn must be very surprised right now, because it just vanished from her hands."

Buffy laughed and started to drink.

"And just for the record… it is Xander, right?" Willow asked when she reached the door.

Buffy didn't answer. Her face told Willow everything and Willow sighed heavily.

She walked out of the room and Buffy laid down.


	17. Chapter 17 Disapearance

**disappearance**

Willow knocked on Giles's door the next morning.

"Come in!" she heard in response and walked inside. "Oh, Willow, what is it? Has something happened?" He was reading a book as always.

"No… yes…" she hesitated. "Giles, I have to tell this to somebody and you're the only one who can fully understand."

"I'm listening." He put the book aside and pointed her the free chair right next to him, then he looked at her with concerned face.

"It's basically this... that... I have to prepare so many spells and magical barriers…"

"You're afraid that you may fail?"

"No… I'm afraid that when my power meets the opponent's power, you know… black magic… I can… I can… again…" she didn't finish and looked down. There was silence. "Giles, I don't want to kill anybody. I don't want to hurt my friends."

"Willow…" he started and bent over a little to look her in the eye, a slight smile appearing on his face. "You don't even know how proud I'm of you."

"Proud?" She was stunned. "The last time I overused magic you called me arrogant, ignorant, impudent and…"

"Wait," he raised his hands, "just listen to me. Now you realized how much damage you can actually cause, but also how much good. You came to me, because you are afraid that something may push you in the wrong direction and that is why I am so proud of you. You admitted it and you want to do something about it. You are really grown up and mature now, Willow."

She smiled.

"And you have nothing to be worry about. I'm fully competent when it comes to magic… you've seen it…" he hesitated, but then said it anyway. "I will be around if you need me and I will help you if something happens, if you feel that you're losing control."

"Thank you." She hugged him and then walked out of the room.

Giles shook his head, another smile appeared on his face.

* * *

"Angel?" Buffy finally took the courage to go and find him. The twilight was closer and closer, so she had only a couple of minutes for this talk. Willow said that there was a full moon today. If Kendra wanted to attack it had to be the day when werewolves were the strongest.

"Yes, Buffy?" He turned to her with a smile on his face. Buffy hesitated on seeing him like that.

"I… I wanted to talk to you… seriously… you know… what I want after… when it's finished… I think, I know what I want."

"You think?" He raised his eyebrows. God, he was so sure of himself! It completely confused her and took her courage away.

"No, I know it," she decided to be strong and get it over with.

"Honey, I know it, too. I've been waiting long enough… too long."

_God, I can't…_ Buffy thought,_ I can't!_ She choked on her own tongue. It was Angel! She would always have feelings for him. He was her first love after all, right? And…

"I'll tell you… after the battle," she chickened out and smiled. That smile was nervous and false, but he didn't notice when being too busy with looking at her lips. Her heart twisted. Before he managed to kiss her, she kissed him in the cheek, put her hand on his shoulder, looked him in the eye and… walked away. She walked out of the castle to the garden.

"Xander?" She couldn't believe her luck. She bumped into him when she got there. She looked back, Angel was already gone. The sun set, but she hoped for a couple of quiet minutes. "I wanted to talk to you, come." She pulled him further where they could talk with no interruption, away from everybody, just the two of them and the empty clearing surrounded by trees and bushes. If it wasn't for the coming battle Buffy would notice the beauty of this place.

"What?" She was surprised that Xander's voice was sharp, full of pain and angriness.

"Xander... what happened?" she asked softy, a little concerned.

"Nothing!"

"Seriously, what's wrong?"

"Nothing! I know everything, you don't even have to say it at loud. I've seen you with Angel. You kissed him…"

"…in the cheek," she interrupted.

"What's the difference. You told him…"

"I didn't tell him anything."

They didn't know that Spike was hiding behind the tree and listening carefully.

"What d'you mean you told him nothing?" Xander was confused. "You wanted to tell him that he's the one, right? So why didn't you?"

"I didn't tell him anything, because if I did, he would find out that… it's you," she finished clumsily but loudly.

Spike was stunned, then he smiled and walked away.

Unfortunately, he wasn't the only one listening. There was a werewolf sitting in the bushes, following Buffy for a long time now.

"What?" Xander bobbed his eyebrows in disbelief. "What did you just say?"

"I would've never thought that I would be able to love someone even more than I loved Angel and I would've never thought that those feelings I had for him would eventually pass. I think Faith was right a couple of years ago when she said that when we're young we're running after fascination, forbidden fruit and after what we cannot have. Besides, Angel was my first love. It was passionate and emotional, but you know that somebody said once that I liked to suffer. Yeah, Faith was right. Funny, isn't it? I just admitted that _she_ was right!"

"Buffy… but… Angel's supposed to be hum…"

"I know, isn't that scary? Even though he's gonna be human I still don't want him. I mean, I would if I didn't remember what Riley once said to me about love, about giving yourself to the other person and about commitment and I finally felt it, but… I felt it for you, Xander. I've been living for all those years without Angel, but when I imagined living without you by my side, losing you… you know, Willow made me realize it. She made me realize that I should stop being afraid, that after the battle it may be too late for saying 'I love you'. I knew from the very beginning what I wanted, but I was too afraid to admit it… I couldn't…" she tangled.

Xander looked at her with shock in his eye.

"I guess what I want to say is: Xander, I love you," she finally confessed.

"And I love _you_, Buffy." He smiled, taking her face into his hands.

Then something weird happened, before he managed to kiss her, something pulled them away from each other.

They screamed in the same time.

Two werewolves – back in the human form – jumped to Xander and caught him.

"XANDER!" Buffy roared, but some mysterious force pushed her in the opposite direction, away from him, away from the castle, away from everything.

She was flying with an enormous speed and then she hit something.

She found herself in some cave, but when she walked out of it she noticed that there was completely nothing around her.

"Xander…" she moaned, biting her lip.

* * *

"Did you hear that?" Faith turned to Angel. The sun set, so they both ran out of the castle. When they reached the garden where they thought was the source of the scream, they found no one. There was no sign of Buffy or Xander.

"Damn it," Angel cursed. "They've got them!"

* * *

**AN **Just wanted to explain why Xander: He always loved Buffy and was there for her. He is the right choice when not being a vampire and therefore, being able to get old with her, give her the life full of light and yes, have sex with her with no consequences. I know Angel was supposed to become human, but I meant what I said in this chapter about the forbidden fruit and the thrill of it. Besides, Joss Whedon wanted Buffy to end up with Xander but eventually decided on the ending we saw as to have comics. (that are, by the way, awful!) and the other reason was that he would like to get more episodes to establish Buffy/Xander relationship in the next season. And we all know - there was no next season.


	18. Chapter 18 Before

**before**

* * *

Buffy cursed. She was terrified. Xander! What would they do to him? Yes, Willow had given her a great advice which in the most brutal way had told her, 'Tell the one you love that you love him, because he can be dead after the battle'. And who would think that the enemy would look for her weak side? But if they hadn't captured Xander they would've probably taken Dawn… bad, bad, too… Shit! Shit! Shit!

And then, a sudden clever idea came to her mind.

She sat in the entrance to the cave, legs crossed, eyes closed… 'Willow'… she focused.

* * *

"I've heard Buffy!" Willow ran out of the castle where she found Giles, Angel, Spike and Faith.

"Yeah, we heard it, too," Angel sighed. "There are no Buffy and Xander here anymore. Kendra must have taken them."

"No!" Willow denied. "I've heard Buffy in my head!"

"Oh, great, now you're hearing voices?" Spike snorted and lit his cigarette.

"I can sense every single slayer in this world and Buffy just contacted me!"

"That's good news!" Giles showed his enthusiasm. "Where is she?"

"In a cave, not so far from here."

"Give me the exact location," Angel demanded.

Willow hesitated. What if Angel found out that Buffy chose… "Willow!" he growled at her, showing off his impatience.

"Ok, ok." She gave it to him. "What about Xander?"

"We'll reach him as soon as we can!" He was gone.

* * *

" Tell us everything you know about the strategy of your team," Kendra demanded.

Xander was tied up to a chair, his face already bruised.

"What kind of a name is Buffy, anyway?" the witch mocked. "Buffy… hahaha!... Tell me!" She hit him so hard in the face that blood appeared on his lips. He looked at her, a little absent.

"I'll never tell you," he gasped.

"My lady… could you hold back a little? His mind has to be focused if you want him to tell you anything," the new leader of vampires said.

"Right," Kendra smiled, "so I'll make you suffer, but the pain will only be in your head. It won't be real, but you will feel it all thanks to magic. Eternal torture without permanent damage to the brain… I like it… When I stop you'll be begging me for mercy. I wonder… how long will you take it?"

She raised her hands.

Xander felt unbearable pain, like hundreds of swords just cut through his body.

He started screaming…

* * *

"Buffy?" Angel reached the right place pointed by Willow. "Buffy?"

"Angel!" She jumped out of the cave. "I wanted to go, but Willow told me to wait."

Angel took her in his arms and a second after that he kissed her.

Buffy didn't know what to do as not to hurt him or encourage in the same time.

"Angel…" She made a step back. "There's no time! We have to find Xander!"She chickened out.

"Ok. Let's go then. We'll catch someone and make them tell us all we need to know."

* * *

"Giles, I think that everything's prepared. They… they're coming… I can feel it."

"I will not let you out of my sight, I promise." He held Willow's hand. "If you want we can have a physical contact, so you could transfer your power to me if you can't control it."

"Right now I'm fine."

"That's good." He let go off her.

"Dawn, Andrew, go hide!... Andrew, remember you promised Buffy that you would defend Dawn!"

"I'm a grown-up, I can manage on my own!" Dawn sulked.

"Be quiet and listen to me! It's not funny! It's a war!" Willow got angry with her.

"But… who will command if Buffy's gone?" Faith asked surprised. "How are we supposed to fight?"

"Looks like you've got promoted," Spike said and dropped his cigarette to the ground, smashing it with his shoe.

"Spike's right," Giles said. "Later on you will clean it up!" he added, looking at the cigarette.

"Yeah… right," Spike snorted.

"What? ME?" Faith was shocked. "Again?"

"Looks like it."

"Oh God… Ok, let's go dance, guys!"

* * *

The pain was suddenly gone. Xander was left shaking, sweat on his forehead.

"Who am I gonna fight?" Kendra repeated. "What is the weak point in your strategy plan?"

"I… won't… tell… bitch…" he stammered.

"Continue without me." She turned to two other witches. "I'll go and lead my army to victory. If you find out something, let me know." She made her way to the exit.

Two witches got closer to Xander.

"Ready, honey?" they asked while raising their hands...


	19. Chapter 19 Fight

**fight**

Beside the bruises, two nasty slashes appeared on his face. He knew that everything was lost and that it was the end. Buffy couldn't know where he was. And where she was? That was an excellent question.

"Angel, how far is it?" Buffy sighed.

* * *

"What? Are you tired already?" he asked, teasing her a little.

"Not. I'm just scared that I won't reach there on time… Xander… they'll kill him…"

"Why did they take him anyway?"

"Isn't it enough that he was with me in the garden? Alone? He's my friend and I would do absolutely anything to save him," she answered, trying to remain calm.

"Actually… yeah…"

"Exactly."

"And what were you two doing out there?"

"Angel…" She was just about to tell him. She would have to do this one day and there was no point in stalling. Only they reached the battlefield and found themselves exactly behind the opponents' side. If they managed to circle the enemy…

* * *

Willow barely managed to hold the illusions as she was standing on the donjon. She'd been doing a great job. The enemy thought that was fighting real vampires and Willow commanded them. All of them eventually turned into dust, but it made the hostile side weaker. Willow tried to thrust some sun balls from time to time, too, but she had to be really careful as not to hit Spike. Angel hadn't come back yet.

Giles was standing close to her, watching her carefully, carrying a crossbow.

"Buffy!" Willow exclaimed and lost her illusions. "Shit!" she growled.

"Don't worry," Giles calmed her down. "We weren't expecting it to hold any longer anyway. You did a great job. What about Buffy?"

"She's out there!" Willow pointed at the back. "Yes, Buffy and Angel, behind the enemies' side… and no one has noticed them… yet…"

_Spike, Faith, Kennedy…_ Willow transferred her thoughts into their minds and to a couple of slayers letting them know what was happening in the back. They were needed there.

They listened and ran to the near forest to circle the battlefield and reappeared in the back near Buffy and Angel.

"Oh no!" Willow suddenly screamed.

"What happened?" Giles was quite disturbed.

* * *

"Buffy! Over here!" Angel caught Kendra.

"How did you find her?"

"She was invisible, but I could sense her!" He turned the witch toward Buffy.

"Do you think it will be _that_ easy?" Kendra asked and…

Before Buffy even managed to react or notice it, Angel… first she saw it on his face…

"Buffy…" he moaned and… turned into dust.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Buffy growled with fury and jumped to Kendra. Surprisingly, the witch didn't move like… she was closed in some kind of a bubble.

* * *

"Angel's dead…" Willow stammered, immediately turning into that direction, "but Kendra won't run away!"

"My God… Angel is dead?" Giles was shocked, "but, Buffy… poor Buffy… if he'd become human…"

"Giles, you don't know, do you?" Willow asked.

"About what?"

"Buffy chose Xander. She couldn't tell Angel and let's hope she didn't… oh… she is… so strong… too strong…"

"Willow, hang on!"

* * *

Buffy's fingers clenched on Kendra's throat and she pulled her to the ground, holding her with her legs.

"Now you'll pay for what you've done to my friend! Do you even realize how important he was?" Buffy started strangling her. "I will kill you… or… you can tell me where I can find my boyfriend, Xander?"

Kendra smiled broadly.

"So it's all about him? It was always about him, wasn't it? Ok, I'll tell you."

When Buffy stood up, letting Kendra free as she'd promised, Willow killed her.

"I never told you that my friend wouldn't kill you," she said with satisfaction in her voice but also despair. She'd lost Angel. She didn't know what was happening with Xander...

Tears were about to float, but she had to fight them. She wanted to break down right there on the spot, but she had to do everything in her power, to the very end.

She started running again, as fast as she could to save the one she loved, the one she gave her heart to… if it wasn't too late…

* * *

Spike, Faith and Kennedy were fighting right next to each other. Everybody was busy with about three enemies at once.

The vampire Faith was fighting twisted her hand painfully and she couldn't let herself free. She squealed.

Spike miraculously staked his two vampires and got to her on time, staking also her opponent. Faith fell on the ground.

"Everything's ok?" he asked, squatting by her side. There had a brief moment of relief. They were close to the trees, so they could rest for a while.

"I think it's broken…" she moaned in pain.

* * *

Kennedy suddenly realized that she was fighting too many enemies at once. She couldn't do this any longer. They surrounded her. She looked around for her friends, but Spike was busy saving Faith, so he didn't notice Kenny needed help, too.

_Willow…_ it was the last thought in Kennedy's mind before vampires jumped to her, biting her neck.

* * *

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the growl came from Willow's heart, from her soul. She bent down and…

"What happened?"

"Kennedy…" she whispered. "No! Giles! Help!" those were the last words of the red witch. She straightened up and now Giles saw that her hair and eyes were black…

"Willow!" he yelled terrified.


	20. Chapter 20 Bitter victory

**AN **I just hope you'll still like me and this story after whom I've killed… But I can give you a scoop - we will see Angel again.

Oh, and this chapter… a lot is happening and I hope you'll like the few surprises here!

(If this was a TV show this chapter would end with a winter break, lol, but don't worry, I will update soon again).

* * *

**bitter victory**

Before Giles managed to make even one step toward Willow, her arms spread widely and there was an illuminating light coming from her chest. Sunlight - the true essence of the Sun. It rushed forward and burned every single vampire on its way. Werewolves and witches were lit by it, too. It was so hot that it was burning humans alive. Fortunately, the slayes and Buffy herself managed to jump out of its way and survived.

* * *

"Spike!" Faith yelled on seeing what was happening and although she had a broken arm, she jumped to him, pushing him deeper into the forest and covering him with her own body.

* * *

Buffy reached the building where Kendra had said Xander was. She looked back as she could feel Willow's fury. Something tragic must have happened, but there was already so much pain in her heart that she didn't stop, refused to think about it. There was only one thought in her mind: make it on time to save Xander, because otherwise she might as well come back to her previous dead stage.

What was the point in living when every single person you loved was dead?

* * *

"WILLOW!" Giles growled. "DON'T!" He thrust himself right in front of her, putting his arms around her despite the light which was still coming out from her chest.

Surprisingly, he realized that he was fine and the light didn't burn him alive. It was the fastness of his action and the magical power he had inside or… of course! Willow herself! That was exactly what Xander had done when she'd wanted to destroy the world once.

Willow also put her arms around Giles and suddenly, the power was stopped. She fell down, pulling Giles with her while still holding him. Her hair turned white and then red again.

"Giles…" she sobbed. "No…" Her voice got weaker, she hadn't been screaming anymore, now it was only silent moaning.

"I know, I know…" He stroke her hair while not letting go off her. "I'm so sorry… so sorry…" he was whispering to her ear and holding her tight.

"Oh, Giles…" She finally loosed her hold on him and looked him in the eye. "Thank you," she whispered, despair painted on her face. "You did it. I'm not bad and I was so close… Kennedy…" She couldn't say anything else, because she started crying all over again.

"I know and I'm still proud of you… you've made it."

"Thanks to you… oh God! Spike! Tell me I didn't hurt him!"

"I wouldn't be so concerned about that."

"Giles!" Willow reprimanded him while standing up and looking around.

She noticed Spike helping Faith to walk. She was injured, but they were both alive.

"Thanks God…"

"Willow, we've won thanks to you..." Giles started.

"Thanks to me?! Thanks to?! Kennedy is dead! This is the real reason!"

"Let's go… sshhh…" He led her downstairs.

"And now she's probably burned… just gone," Willow was still sobbing.

* * *

Spike and Faith reached the castle and she went further on alone. Slayers helped her take care of her wounds.

Willow went down and waved her hand. Faith's arm was healed in an instant.

Spike felt strange, differently. He felt hotness and… No, how was that possible? Then he understood… the prophecy was about Angel as a champion, but then Angel had died and now Spike had almost sacrificed himself again. This time to save only one life, not the whole Sunnydale, and it was the life of the slayer, Faith. His heart was beating again.

He was shocked but happy in the same time. He stepped into the shadow and after a while he decided to disappear. Buffy would be happy with Xander… and he, Spike, could use same real life.

* * *

"Where is Spike?" Giles asked after a while.

Nobody had seen him and nobody could find him… Spike was gone…

* * *

_Xander… Xander… Xander…_

Buffy was shivering. She was almost there…

She ran to the top floor of the building Kendra had mentioned and silently slip into the room.

"Let's take a look… you've already lost one eye… if you don't tell us… you'll lose another."

Xander looked at the witch talking to him, he was wounded and exhausted.

"Bring it on…" he said silently. He knew that no one would save him and no one would come for him. He knew he would be dead in a moment.

"First of all, you've already lost the battle and second, haven't I told you that you should not mess with my boyfriend?" he suddenly heard Buffy's voice and the witches fell down on the floor, knocked unconscious.

"Xander…" Buffy looked at him, having the impression that her heart was just about to break. "God… What have they done to you?" She quickly cut his ropes and hugged him. "Your face." She took his face in her hands. "I'm so sorry… I…"

"You're sorry? Honey… I thought… but you're here now." He smiled. "Auch." Even though he was in pain, he pulled her closer and hugged tightly. After a while, he kissed her like he was supposed to kiss her just before they had been separated.

Buffy clang to him, but then she moved away.

"We won… Willow… something happened… she exaggerated with her power and I think she burned the whole army of our enemies up."

"That's good… but… what happened exactly?"

"I don't know. Last time she was acting like that was just after Tara's death…" Buffy stopped. "I think that Kennedy's dead. Probably," she moaned. "Xander… Angel's dead, too."

"Angel is dead?" he was surprised. "How?"

"Willow sent him after me… he helped me get the information from Kendra and… she killed him… she just…"

"Come here." Xander hugged her again. "Did you tell him?" he whispered into her ear.

"No. I couldn't and then when I was just about to… I took the courage and… he was just gone…" she cried.

"Shhh…" Xander started stroking her hair.

" D'you know what's the worst part? This thought… if I hadn't told you… now you would've thought that you're the consolation after… that you're my second choice…"

"But you did tell me earlier and no, I wouldn't have thought that, honey, sshhh…"

"Let's go," she said. "Can you walk?"

"I think I can."

"The dawn's coming."

When they turned to walk away one of the witches stood in their way.

"It would be better for you if you killed me," she said.

"I don't kill humans."

"Your mistake."

Some strange light appeared from nowhere and Buffy was suddenly sucked into it.

"BUFFY!" Xander yelled, but she was already gone. The hole was closed.

"Now you will die," the witch said, looking at the spot where the slayer had been standing just before she disappeared. "You don't have a girlfriend anymore," she turned to Xander. "She is dead! She's in Hell!"

Xander took the axe Buffy had dropped and chopped off the witch's head, then he did the same with the other one that was still unconscious.

He dropped the axe and fell down on the floor. His body shivering…

* * *

_The dawn is coming… the dawn is coming… blood… blood… strength…_

Kennedy sat on the ground and right after that she ran to the cave where Buffy had landed up earlier before. She wanted blood, she craved for blood…

She was a vampire…

* * *

"I don't feel her anymore. She's really dead," Willow stammered while talking about Kennedy.


	21. Chapter 21 Dead for the third time

**Dead for the thirth time**

Xander was in pain and it wasn't the physical one. This was much worse. How could he lose his girlfriend when he finally got her? After so many years? So many obstacles and relationships standing in the way?

He could barely walk but started to walk home…** (I like the song "Only Time" by Enya to this scene.)**

"Xander…" Dawn whispered, "Xander's coming! But… he's alone…" She was standing in front of the castle, watching out for him and Buffy.

Willow tried to feel Buffy, but she couldn't, so she got terrified. Buffy couldn't have died!

Giles and Willow ran out of the castle, but she got to Xander faster and helped him, because he could barely walk.

"Oh my God, Xander, what happened? They tortured you?"

Xander didn't say a word, but one look at his face was enough to know everything. Giles lost his speech, so did Dawn. They brought their poor friend inside and helped him get to the couch.

"Xander… where's Buffy?" Dawn moaned.

"Buffy…" Xander started, but stopped. He hid his face in his hands and tried to fight the tears. He was a man, he had to be strong! But how long could he bear it?

"No…" Dawn whispered. "No! No! NO!" she growled. "Don't tell me… IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! YOUR AND YOUR STUPID LOVE! YOU KILLED MY SISTER!" She fell down on the floor, sobbing.

"Dawnie…" Willow started, reaching a hand to her.

"DON'T YOU TOUCH ME! WHY DO I HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS ALL OVER AGAIN?!"

"Dawn! Calm down!" Giles yelled what surprised her. She looked up at him, suddenly getting quiet. "If something happened… it's nobody's fault!"

"But she's right," Xander stammered and raised his head, finally daring to look at them. "She is right… if I hadn't told Buffy that I loved her… if she hadn't told me the same before the battle… no one would've taken us…"

"They would've taken somebody else. Dawn," Willow said.

"What?"

"I was the one who killed Kendra, remember? I was in her mind. If she hadn't found the man that Buffy loved, she would've taken Dawn. Her sister. It would've all ended the same way."

"What really happened?" Giles asked, losing control over himself. He took off his glasses and started cleaning them up, but everybody could notice the tears in his eyes anyway.

"The witches… Buffy saved me… they were torturing me and Buffy took them down and… when we were just about to go… one of them woke up and sent Buffy somewhere… to the other dimension or something… I'm not sure, but the witch clearly said that… that my girlfriend was dead," he said. "I paid them back. I chopped off their heads."

"She sent her…" Willow stopped.

"Where?" Xander asked.

"No. I can't…"

"TELL ME!"

"To Hell… I think…"

There was silence. Painful silence. Nobody said it aloud, but they were all the same: 'they shouldn't have taken her out of Heaven in the first place, but how could they know?'

"I was always saying that Buffy was too good for killing people, even witches, with no offence Willow… I knew it would finally get her in trouble. You, Xander, you did the right thing," Giles spoke.

"So what? SHE'S FU*****G GONE NOW! AND I WILL NEVER GET HER BACK!" he roared and stood up.

"Xander…" Willow whispered through her tears. "I know that this lost is the worst for you and Dawn, but just wait, let us help you. Your face… I can fix it, your wounds…"

"Willow, no offence again, but I think you had enough magic for today," Giles said warningly. "You've seen what happened!"

"Kennedy?" Xander asked.

Willow shook her head, so he put his hand on her shoulder.

"I know, Giles," Willow turned to him, "but just take a look at him. He suffered so much…"

"I don't want you to heal those wounds," Xander decided. "I must feel pain."

Nobody had to ask why.

"I can't forget the one thing you said to me once, Giles, when…" Willow stopped and inhaled deeply. "_When you lose somebody you love, the other people in your life become meaningless._ We can't let that happen. Dawn?"

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" she cried and wanted to leave, but Giles didn't let her. He wrapped his arms around her and she started sobbing while clenching to him.

"Shhh… it will be ok… we all feel this pain…"

But no one could describe what was happening in _his_ heart…

Xander walked out of the room, went upstairs, limping. He couldn't not think about the happy times he'd spent with Buffy in this castle. Maybe not that happy… the castle had been hunted… the floors had disappeared… but they'd been together then… they'd had so many wonderful moments together… it'd been just the beginning of what could've been…

He didn't go to his room. He went straight to the room right next to it, to hers, and closed himself in there.

* * *

Xander wasn't going out for two days, so Willow was leaving him food by the door. Sometimes he even took it, but according to her and Giles, he wasn't eating enough.

Dawn wasn't feeling better at all, but she didn't isolate herself from everyone. She only refused to go to school for a couple of days and didn't talk to anyone.

Willow had problems at nights. Something bad started happening to her. She was burning up from wanting to use magic. There was still something inside of her, making her want it just like she'd had after Tara's death.

In those moments Giles was wonderful to her. He was sitting by her side, sometimes even the whole night and he was holding her hand, giving her the strength to overcome those bad feelings.

The third night Willow even fell asleep with her head on his shoulder. Then it was only getting better and better with restraining the urge for magic.

* * *

Buffy hit the ground hard and looked around. It wad dark, barely twilight, she could sense it.

She didn't know where she was.

She stood up and brushed the dust off, then looked around. Xander wasn't there with her. What that witch had done to her?

She made a few steps forward.

Suddenly, she recognized that area. Oh, no, no, no… it was impossible! Unless it was time travel or different dimension.

It was Sunnydale and it didn't look destroyed at all.

"Where are you going, sweetheart?" She recognized that voice, but it was different, angry, bad.

She turned around.

Angelus was standing right in front of her. Not Angel, Angelus. The soulless vampire.

And right behind him…

Buffy was terrified.

"Xander? Willow?"

But they weren't her friends. They didn't recognize her. They had fangs… all of them…


	22. Chapter 22 Dopelgangerland

**Doppelgangerland**

"Angel?" she squealed, led by a false hope.

"Do we know each other?" he snorted. He was definitely bad, she could tell judging from the tone of his voice.

"Angel… I… Buffy…"

"Oyoyoy!" he stammered on purpose. "We're lost, hah?" He got closer.

"You don't know who you're dealing with!" she growled, feeling her cold blood returning. It wasn't Angel, Angel had died in her world once and for all and this world… it had to be some devilish alternative!

"Really?" He smiled, getting even closer.

Buffy didn't hesitate. She used the stake. He stopped her immediately and the stake hung a few inches from his chest.

"Slayer, hah?" he snorted again. "Ok, I know who I'm dealing with now, but I still think it would be like a cat and mouse. I am the cat." He raised his fist.

Buffy ducked and then hit him...

Suddenly, an idea came to her mind. Maybe it was the world where Willow – the doppelganger – had come from?

"Willow! Have… have you recently been to a different dimension where you met the other you? The other you who wasn't a vampire? A little, sweet version of yourself?"

"What?" Xander laughed, his face disgustingly deformed as he was a vampire.

Buffy couldn't look at him. It hurt too much. Right before she got here she'd been kissing him! She'd been kissing Xander who'd been tortured, beaten up and completely in love with her.

She evaded Angelus's blow again, but she was still missing his heart and she really tried to kill him this time.

"Thanks for the dance, slayer, see you! I hope our next meeting will be even more exciting! If you live… take care of her," he turned to Willow and Xander.

He disappeared and two vampires got to Buffy. It was like the worst nightmare ever. Everybody she loved was dead.

"No…" she moaned when Xander's fist met her face.

Or maybe she was in Hell? She was sure of it now!

She staked Willow… She was watching her best friend being turned into dust…

She didn't even think that the worst was yet to come, because Xander was so angry and mad now.

She also staked him and right after that she weakly fell down to the ground, sobbing…

Suddenly, a car arrived, the door opening for her.

"Is everything alright?" She would've never thought that she would consider these words and this voice the best music!

"GILES?!" She raised from the ground, opening her eyes widely. "GILES!" She was so relieved. "And you're not a vampire! Oh, Giles!" She got to him to hug him.

"Eh… alright…" He pushed her back gently. "Who are you?"

She was confused.

"Buffy… don't you recognize me? Don't… you don't know me?" she stammered.

"Whatever you have to tell me I'm sure will be interesting, but first you get in the car."

She did what he'd asked for and started talking…

* * *

"Giles!" Willow screamed. while having a fever again. Just when she thought that it finally ended, it started all over again.

She heard his footsteps in the corridor and there he was, in her room.

"Willow, what happened?"

"I was so sure that I could control it… and suddenly… I had a dream… Tara… Kennedy… Buffy… they were all blaming me… I almost… turned into the Dark me… again… " she started sobbing.

"It's ok… it's ok…" He sat by her side on the bed and let her cry on his shoulder. "Better?" he asked after a long time of silence. How many nights he'd been doing this already?

"Yes, thank you…" she whispered and raised her head to look at him.

Their faces were so close to each other. They looked each other in the eyes and without even realizing what they were doing, their lips suddenly touched.

After a second they both jumped away from each other.

"I'm sorry!" they said in the same time.

"Totally!" Willow yelled. "It was an accident."

"An accident!" he confirmed.

"Because… because we're both grieving right now and… and it's like looking for consolation… it's not right."

"Exactly, Willow... It's not right… I… If you need anything... call..."

"Xander…"

"Exactly. Call Xander."

Giles walked out of her room completely hot. He came back to his place as soon as he could, because he was afraid that he would listen to his body's natural reaction instead to his head and came back to Willow.

* * *

"So you are saying that you have come from some other dimension where we all… those two vampires you slew… me… some other people… we are friends," Giles repeated, trying to understand it all, "and there is not only one slayer anymore, there are actually hundreds of them, because the witch… Willow… who is a vampire in this world…"

"...she changed everything when I gave her the scythe." Buffy finished nodding.

"Alright, let's say I believe you, but… Buffy… how am I supposed to help you come back there? Do you realize what you're asking me to do? I don't have such power to open a portal and, what is more, to open the right one…"

"Giles, I believe in you. You're my only hope. If somebody in this world can help me, it's you."

He didn't say a word, he just took off his glasses and started cleaning them up.

"I will try, but I'm not promising you anything."


	23. Chapter 23 Other Dimension

**Other Dimension**

Willow was really worried about Xander. Even Dawn was feeling better, but he was still sad and despaired. She didn't know what to do to help him and the worst part was that he didn't want any help. He was working as always, but he moved to Buffy's room. He didn't laugh, didn't joke, was completely passive. He was spending a lot of time in the gym to unload his angriness and last time he'd almost passed out from exhaustion. It wasn't the same Xander they'd used to know. They would've never thought he could change so much! They remembered his jokes as he'd been always trying to release their tension by telling them and now… it was all gone.

"He's acting like some phantom or ghost," Willow said to Giles. "What can I do to help him?"

"Give him more time," Giles suggested.

"No. He's had enough time! Even Dawn's feeling much better! She had a date recently! And Xander? Nothing! I mean… I'm not saying that he should to go on a date. I'm saying that he should move on a little bit. He should at least try to live again… laugh… anything!"

"Everybody copes with their despair differently."

Willow got angry with Giles. It was obvious that something was lost between them once and for all. They didn't talk, didn't comment anything what had happened. Everything seemed different. They were distant.

"I… You can say that I had to cope with Kennedy's death and Buffy's death and Xander… Giles! He wasn't acting like that even when Anya died!"

"So you have the answer to the question who he really loved!" Giles yelled at her in angry voice.

"Shame on you!" Willow growled. "It doesn't mean that he didn't love Anya! He just… knew that he would never be happy with her! Two different families, demons, remember?! Xander's family's hard enough."

"Willow…" She could feel the strangeness in Giles's voice. He was angry, irritated and there was also something else… she couldn't tell what.

"Ok!" she growled again and walked out of the library, slamming the door hard behind her.

She found Xander – as usual – in his weapon stock. It was the first place she looked, then she would go to the gym where he would be for sure.

"Xander?"

He was rearranging his weapons again.

"Why are you doing it again? Start living!"

"Willow…"

"I'm begging you! I can't stand looking at you like that. It hurts me! I know that Buffy…"

"We'll never get her back," he said silently and hit the table with his fist. "Never!"

"And we have to learn how to live with this."

"I know what you're all thinking… he wasn't suffering like that even when Anya died… but Willow, don't you think it's a little too much already?"

"I know."

"And we don't have this stupid Osiris vase to bring her back... You know what hurts the most?"

"What?"

"She's suffering! She'll always be suffering! I just can't live with this."

"I'm trying not to think about it. But I am the one who should feel the worst. I was the one who pulled her out of Heaven, so somebody else could send her to Hell."

"Will…" Xander got closer and hugged her. "I'm sorry… I…"

"We can't keep saying _what if_ all the time…" Tears appeared in her eyes. "We have to live on, because there's nothing else we can do…"

* * *

"Giles?" Buffy went into his apartment. "Giles! I can't stand it any longer! It's been almost two months! When will you give me some answers?"

"Buffy, teleporting body and soul to other dimension… the whole essence of yours… it's very complicated! I'm not a witch, actually… a warlock in this case, and even if I found some… do you realize how long it would take to find the right portal to the right world? The fastest way is to return you to your ground, to your gravitation, the world you were born in, to your earth which is supposed to call you in."

"Ok, Ok, skip the philosophy. I want concrete facts."

"I don't have them! But I'm looking for something else right now."

"What's that?" she got interested.

"I'm done with witchcraft, as I said we can't do it this way. We have to find a natural portal."

"Hah?"

Giles took off his glasses and started cleaning them up.

"In different places, at different hours there are portals which appear only for a limited period of time. There are invisible for the normal mortal being, but for the person who doesn't belong to this world… like you… you could jump into this portal and it should point you in the right direction. This is the best way, but I'm not one hundred percent sure. Yet, It's our only hope. You can either do it or stay here."

"No," she denied. "No way! I'd rather die. I'll take even the slightest chance."

"Ok, I'll keep looking then."

* * *

A couple of weeks later Buffy walked out of her hiding spot again – she was hiding from Angelus – to visit Giles. She wanted to bring his some doughnuts and asked how it was going.

He wasn't home. The library, she thought, of course!

But when she came to the library she saw that the door was shattered…

She ran inside and… she dropped the coffee and doughnuts. They splattered on the floor.

The library was completely destroyed, shelves collapsed, books ripped.

"Giles? Giles!" Buffy screamed with terror in her voice. It wasn't that Giles was her only hope for getting out of this world, it was just about him. It was Giles! The first thought in Buffy's mind was: _please, live!_

She heard a weak moan from under one of the shelves.

"Giles!" She got to it and pulled the furniture away.

He was lying on the floor, covered in blood, barely alive, but alive after all.

"Giles?" She took his face in her hands. "Giles? Can you hear me? Can you move?"

"Bu… Buffy…" he moaned. "I can't… my spine… I can't feel my legs… I think my spine is broken…"

"Oh, Giles…" she cried. "What happened?"

"Angelus… this library is a public place… I was working up till late…"

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…" she moaned.

"No… don't be… he would catch me… eventually… I'm a watcher… after all… right? It doesn't matter that… I don't have a… slayer… right now… I'm working for the… Council and… I'm doing my best… to fight evil here… vampires mmm… know… me…"

"Giles…" She couldn't find the right words, so she just kept repeating his name and holding his hand.

"I know… where the portal is, Buffy… it will open… tomorrow… midnight… you won't believe it… Empire State Building… you will see the green flash… you will have a minute… but I don't guarantee… anything…"

"I will jump," she assured him. "Thank you…" she sobbed. She didn't have enough strength to fight her tears anymore.

"Am I… happy in your world?" he suddenly asked.

Buffy thought about Jenny Calendar, but after all, it'd been only an episode in Giles's life, intensive, but small. Then she thought about his face when she'd come back from the dead. He'd been so happy to see her again. Later on in the castle he'd been finally proud of Willow, proud of Xander who'd been doing so well with his military skills…

Buffy smiled.

"Yes," she whispered through tears. "Yes, you are happy… I don't know about right now, when I'm gone, but yes."

He also smiled.

"Who knows… maybe I will be born again in such a world? Maybe there is no real Heaven or Hell, only dimensions? Maybe you just have to find yourself in the right one to be happy?" And with this smile on his face he died.

Buffy shivered but knew she had to be strong for him. She had a little above twenty four hours to reach New York. Better do it fast while Angelus was still sleeping under the ground and couldn't get to her. She knew that if she really tried she could kill him, but she preferred not to risk her life. She couldn't restore his soul anyway.

She turned round and ran out of the library.


	24. Chapter 24 Portal

**Portal**

Buffy sighed with relief. When the twilight came she was far away from Sunnydale and Angelus couldn't know where she was heading. Even if, he would've never reached her on time.

Full of doubts, with heart pounding hard and nervously in her chest, she climbed up the stairs to the roof of the Empire State Building. Green light… green light…

* * *

"Giles… we've made a decision with Dawn and Xander. It was hard, but we believe it'll be for the best."

"What kind of a decision?"

Willow asked Giles to meet them in the living room and now she had to tell him the news.

"We've decided to leave England," she said.

"Ow… Why?"

"We've come here because we had no place to go," Xander started, "and we are really grateful for all you've done for us. You gave us shelter, but let's be honest… it's not our place anymore. Buffy…" he stopped for a moment and inhaled deeply as something hurt him, "Buffy… she was here with the other slayers, she was training them and we were helping her, we were like one big family, but now…"

"No Buffy, no Kennedy, no Angel, no Spike…" Willow counted. "This place only reminds us of those who we've lost. It's too much pain."

"So you just decided to move?"

"Sorry, I'm late," Faith appeared and sat on the couch, right next to Dawn. "Did I miss something?"

Willow ignored her.

"Philadelphia," she said. "We're moving to Philadelphia."

"What?" Giles and Faith asked in the same time.

"Are you sure that is what you all want?" Giles asked just to make sure.

"Yes," Dawn confirmed. "I'm not a minor anymore, so I don't have to worry about my legal guardian. I can just stay with them."

"I'm sorry, but what about me? Maybe I don't want to go to Philadelphia?" Faith interrupted. "I like it here. English men… sexy."

Giles made a strange face.

"You know you're too old for me," she added.

"God, Faith, did I imply something?"

Only he didn't lose countenance because of Faith, he lost it for the same reason Willow did.

"Giles, do you want to come with us?" Xander suddenly asked.

"Me?" Rupert was surprised. "Why?"

"We need you," Dawn said. "You're our family."

"But… I'm not sure…" he hesitated.

" You don't have much to do here anyway," Willow spoke. "Do you?"

"Yes, in fact… I don't, but… I'm still not sure… Maybe we can have this castle as a headquarters for the slayers," Giles suggested. "They could come here from all over the world and they would always find a place to stay, a gym and a field for training."

"Great idea." Willow was glad. "Faith? Are you staying then?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed happily. "Sure, I'm staying! I'm still wanted back in America, so…"

"Unless somebody cleared your files," Xander noticed.

"Maybe Angel, but I don't think so."

"So it's settled then. I'm going to pack. Dawnie, do you need any help?" Willow turned to the only one Summers left.

"I'm not a child, thank you, I can manage!" she growled and ran upstairs.

It looked like everything was coming back to normal…

* * *

Buffy finally saw what she wanted to see. It had to be it… the green light… right in the corner of the balcony.

She got closer to it, reaching out her hand and… nothing happened. It would probably work only if she jumped, she sighed.

There was no other choice anyway. She pulled one of her legs over the banister.

"Miss! What are you doing?!" she heard some woman's terrified voice.

"Mum! This lady wants to kill herself!" Great! A little boy! What was that woman doing here with him just before midnight? But Buffy had no choice. There wouldn't be another chance.

The clock stroke for the first time...

There was no time…

"Lady! Stop!" Buffy saw some man running toward her to catch her, but it was too late. She already jumped.

She could imagine their faces when they would call the police only to find out that there wasn't actually a body on the street. The would probably think that they'd imagined it or that they'd seen a ghost. Probably a ghost of a woman who'd killed herself a long time ago right there on the spot.


	25. Chapter 25 Run

**Run**

Buffy was surprised of how hard she hit the ground.

She stood up immediately anyway. Nothing happened to her. She was alive. She looked around… Where was she? It was day, not night, so it was a good sign - England. She made sure that she could see the castle in the distance and ran toward it as fast as she could.

"Xander?!" she ran inside the castle and started screaming. "Giles?! Willow?! Dawnie?!"

Nobody answered her until…

"BUFFY?!" It was Faith. She looked sleepy. She must have been in the disco the whole night, Buffy thought. "Buffy? But… how… you're alive!" She ran down the stairs and grabbed her by her shoulders. "Unbelievable! It's really you! How many times did you die and came back now?"

"I didn't die, Faith, I was in other dimension, in the world where I met… Giles… Willow and Xander were vampires… Angelus…" Buffy shivered on the memory. "I don't have time for this now... Where's everybody? I need to find Xander…"

"Buffy, you were gone… long… like two months or more… Do you realize that?"

Buffy felt like she needed to sit down, but instead she just leaned against the wall.

"Where are they?" She ignored that. "You thought I was dead… Where are they?"

"At the airport. They're going back to America today… like nowish…" She looked at her watch.

"Oh my… How they coped with all of this? I mean… with my death…" It all seemed so surreal to her. She couldn't imagine the pain they must've been feeling… again.

"It was the worst with Xander. He's become a completely different person, I haven't heard him joking since… you know."

"Where are they going exactly?" Buffy covered her mouth with her hands.

"Philadelphia. They want to move there, but I wanted to stay here."

"And who's going there?"

"Xander, Willow, Dawn and Giles. Kennedy's dead…" Buffy was afraid she might be. "Willow handled it very bad, she was keep changing into that dark psycho witch, but Giles saved her. Spike disappeared right after the battle and no one has heard from him ever since and about Angel… you already know…"

"Ok! I'm going to the airport!" Buffy ran out of the castle.

"Great! Don't bother with closing the door!" Faith yelled after her, yawned and closed it. Then she realized that Willow should have her cell phone, but when she tried to call her she realized that the witch turned it off. "Shit! Buffy will have to manage on her own…" And she went back to sleep.

* * *

Buffy reached the airport and started looking around but couldn't see a tall, black-haired man or Willow's red head anywhere.

She looked for information.

"Plane to Philadelphia?" she asked in a rush, breathing fast.

"There is no direct one, only with the change… and this one is just about to take off in a couple of minutes…"

"Yes, it would be the one! Where?"

"You won't make it, the passengers are boarding right now…"

"I don't want to get on, I just want to catch somebody!"

The woman told her where to look and Buffy ran there.

As soon as she got to the top of the escalator where the gates were, she was stopped. The guards wouldn't let her go any further.

She was in despair. She looked down and just by the door she saw them. She saw her friends in a queue, her family. She noticed Xander, Dawn… Faith was right, Xander wasn't himself, one look and she could tell.

"XANDER!" she screamed. "XANDER!"

But they didn't hear her. He didn't hear her.

"Wait…" The others were just by the door when Xander stopped. "Buffy?"

Giles put his hand on his shoulder

"She's gone. We have to move on…"

Xander sighed and turned toward the gate.

"XANDER!"


	26. Chapter 26 Buffy

**Buffy**

"No…" Buffy moaned and stopped trying to get there. She lost them. She would have to wait for about 18 hours until somebody would turn on their phone… or she would catch the next flight… but she hadn't taken any money with her.

"Xander…" Giles turned around again, but Xander wasn't there.

He was stunned, because he noticed Xander running up the escalator – the wrong side of the escalator, the one was going down and Xander was running up… But he made it. Even a bigger shock was to see a girl who was so…

"What's he doing?" Dawn asked and a moment later she opened her eyes widely in surprise.

Xander noticed Buffy in the very last moment. He thought he heard her screaming his name. He turned around and saw a blond young woman held by the guards. And she looked exactly like his Buffy.

Without even thinking he ran toward the escalator, mistook the side, yet didn't care. He made it.

He ran, got to the girl who's back was turned on him now, put his hands on her arms and whirled her around to see her face.

He was standing face to face with Buffy.

"Buffy…" he stammered, looking into her eyes and still holding her at arm's length.

"Xander…" The sparkle in her eyes, the beginning of her smile, her tears of joy...

He moved his hands from her arms to her cheeks and pulled her closer. They kissed urgently, then Buffy stood on her fingers and hugged him tightly.

"Xander…" She was crying and kept repeating his name, then she started kissing his whole face.

"Buffy…?" she heard her sister's feeble voice right behind Xander.

He let her go unwillingly, so she could hug Dawn. Tears were flowing.

Then Willow and Giles appeared.

Buffy thought that Giles would strangle her with his hug, so would Willow.

"But… how?" Xander gasped. "Honey, how did you come back?"

"You died for the third time and you're alive again," Dawn added carefully.

"I didn't die," Buffy denied. "God, Faith made me realize what you guys have been through…"

"That witch sent you to Hell, it equals death, so how did you come back? It's a miracle!"

"I wasn't in Hell. I was in a different dimension and… God, it was so horrible!" She clenched her fingers on Xander's hand, so he pulled his arm around her neck. "You, Willow and you, Xander… you were vampires out there, you were serving Angelus…"

"Angelus…? The bad one?" Giles needed to be sure.

"Yes. Angel didn't have a soul in that world and I… he left me with Willow and Xander and… they attacked me, I didn't have a choice… they were vampires… I killed them…" Buffy cried while going through all of this again in her head. They friends couldn't find the right words. "Then I met you, Giles… You didn't know me, it was like I didn't exist in that world, but you helped me anyway… You pointed me the right portal…" Buffy told them everything else.

They all held their breaths, Xander pulled her even closer.

"Angelus… God! It wasn't enough that he killed you all and I didn't even find the courage to face him! I couldn't risk being killed! If I'd died, I wouldn't have been able to come back here."

"I think we won't go anywhere today. I'll go to return our tickets," Willow said and then they all went back to the castle.

* * *

"Big happy ending, hah?" Faith asked. She was watching TV in the living room when they came in.

"Looks like it," Buffy said and sat down by her side.

"Can we go through it again?" Giles asked when Faith turned off the TV. Xander sat right next to Buffy and she was happy to rest her head on his arm.

"I think it's obvious," Willow said.

"And how is that?" Giles got interested. "It's not obvious for me and I think that I am speaking for everyone in this room, except you. That witch sent Buffy to Hell, but she didn't land up in one!"

"Because it depends on how you see Hell in your mind," Willow explained. Still, no one understood.

"What?" Dawn looked at her like she was an idiot.

"She didn't send Buffy to the real Hell. She sent her to the Hell Buffy imagined. That is the difference. The witch maybe was able to do some pretty powerful mojo, but she wasn't that bright. The Hell in Buffy's imagination was the world where she actually landed up. The world where her closest friends were dead or were dying and this is your case, Giles. Buffy was probably afraid that she would have to kill me or Xander if we became vampires, that Angelus might kill you Giles as… I'm sorry…" she hesitated.

"…as he killed Jenny, it's ok, Willow," Giles said and nodded in agreement.

"Ok… and Angel didn't have a soul and… there was no Dawn in that world like she never really existed. Buffy, are you afraid that your sister will just stop existing and you won't even notice?"

Buffy didn't say anything.

"It's alright, Buffy," Dawn told her. "Don't worry. You don't have to hide those feelings from me. I won't disappear, I'm a human."

"Yes, Dawnie is a human. Permanently," Willow confirmed. "So no worries there."

"So this world… it do

* * *

esn't exist, right? I mean… there's no such world among other dimensions, is it?" Buffy asked.

"Probably… yeah…" Willow confirmed again. "It existed only in your head or the witch's spell created it, but I think it doesn't exist without you in it."

"Thanks God!... Can I rest now?" Buffy asked. "I know you've all been missing me and it was a shock to all of you that I'm back… I'm so sorry you suffered so much, because of me again," she finally finished with regret.

"Sorry? Buffy, you can't be sorry! You've come back and it's all that matters," Giles said and hugged her again. All of them did.

Then Xander took Buffy upstairs. He didn't want to let her out of his sight.

"I've taken you room," he said while opening the door for her. "If you don't mind… I can go to my place…" he stammered, not really knowing what to do. It was all fresh to them.

"No," she said and closed the door behind them. "Xander, I'm so sorry that you've suffered so much…" she started again.

"Ssshhh… it's not your fault… Besides, you're here now and it's all that matters to me. Let's forget about the past and focus on the future ahead of us." He kissed her.

"You know I'm not that tired." She smiled and started unbuttoning his shirt. He sighed and clang to her lips again, looking for her tongue.

There was finally the moment they'd been waiting for for so long.

First Buffy's exes had come back, then there had been a battle and this unfortunate thing with Buffy's disappearance, but they finally landed up in bed.

* * *

**AN **THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FOR SO MANY REVIEWS! I AM SO HAPPY YOU ENJOY THIS STORY! (I can tell we're right in the middle of it)


	27. Chapter 27 Philadelphia

**Philadelphia**

Everybody moved to Philadelphia a week later anyway. They bought a pretty big and nice house in the suburbs and lived there together. Although they weren't related at all (except for Buffy and Dawn), they felt like one big family.

Buffy was surprised by the slayers. They said goodbye in a very surprising and touching way.

"Buffy…" one of them spoke. "It's all thanks to you, thanks to you we've gained our powers, powers we couldn't even dreamed of, but first you alone had to fight against the forces of darkness when you were barely fifteen years old… We were thinking what to give you as a goodbye gift and then we realized something so obvious. You don't have to save the world anymore or running after vampires. We'll all be doing this for you. Every single one of us, so you can rest for a while. We can do this, we've learnt a lot from you. We still have Faith and beside, you deserve a normal life you always wanted."

Buffy couldn't speak, so did her friends.

"I…" she started eventually. "I… I don't know what to say… You have no idea how much it means to me…" she stammered. "Thank you, but I think that from time to time I'll have to slay some vampires in my area anyway."

They all laughed.

"Xander," Buffy whispered, turning to her man.

"I know, honey, I know… We can live like the most normal couple in the world now. And… we have all the time in the world. So, what d'you say? D'you wanna spend it with me?"

"It sounded… very official, but, yes, I want to. Very much." She smiled and squeezed his hand.

In the past few weeks she discovered something amazing. It was new and exciting - she didn't have to worry about his boyfriend becoming bad anymore. There was no such a danger in this relationship, Xander wasn't one of so-called bad boys. Everything had gotten better. Someone finally made her feel young, loved and finally, she could love back as much as she was being loved.

The life was just starting for her…

And with all those hopes for the future they flew back to America.

* * *

"I love our new house," Buffy said with a blissful smile on her face while sitting in the garden. The sun was just setting, but it was still hot.

Xander walked out of the house and handed her a glass of lemonade.

"Wonderful," she whispered, looking at him bathed in the rest of the sunlight.

"What is?" he asked.

"You. In the sun. It's nice to have a boyfriend who can actually walk in the sunlight." The smile couldn't fade away from her face.

"It's good to be loved." He also smiled.

"Gee!" Dawn growled. "Get a room!"

"Dawn, I thought we've talked about this."

"Buffy, you died and then came back, beside this little quarrel we had after you two… nothing."

"Xander, can you leave us for a moment? I'll be right there."

"No problem." He got back to the house.

"Dawnie, I thought that you didn't have any feelings for him anymore."

"It's true, but now, when everybody's happy that you're alive and everything's ok, we can finally talk."

"I promise you, when I said to you that Xander wasn't for you I didn't know I would fall in love with him."

"I know and I understand. End of topic. Even if... he won't get interested in me, so let's cut it."

"So everything's good between us?"

"Yeah."

"Come here." Buffy hugged her sister.

"You two have my blessing," Dawn sighed. "What doesn't mean that I don't feel weird."

"I understand."

"Buffy!" Dawn screamed while pointing at something in the trees.

Buffy turned around.

A demon. Very ugly and disgusting demon with some strange liquid on its claws.

"Yuck!" Dawn blenched.

"Buffy?" Xander and Willow ran out of the house, alarmed by the little Summers's scream.

Buffy moved toward the demon, but she immediately landed up on her butt a few meters away. It was fast. She had to admit that.

"Gee..." She stood up. "I think I shouldn't have given up on my training… Xander, don't!" But he already jumped to it with a sword in his hand.

Demon hurt him with its claw and Xander moaned. Fortunately, it was just a scratch.

"HEY!" Buffy went mad. "Stay away from my man!" She took the sword from Xander, who looked confused, and chopped the demon's head off. "Xander? Everything's alright?" she asked, because he was looking in the distance very strangely. "Xander?"

"I… I can't see…" He waved his hand right before his eyes.

"What do you mean? Your eye's fine."

"But I can't see…"

Buffy took his face in her hands and looked at him. He was right.

"Willow…"

Willow got closer, also confused and looked Xander in the face. Then Giles appeared.

"Let's take him to a hospital," he suggested. "Maybe there is a complication from the last… attack… when he lost his eye."

"I'm not so sure… it has to be that demon!" Buffy yelled.

"Buffy, he barely scratched his arm…"

"Maybe it was a poison?" Willow suggested. "Giles, do you have any books here?"

"Actually, I do. The transport cost me a small fortune, but…"

"Ok, let's get to work then."

"And I'll take him to a hospital," Buffy said, trying not to sound terrified.

She helped Xander get to his feet.

"Do something with this body," she pointed the demon. "It would be best if you just keep it for a while. We may need it," she added.

"Buffy…" Xander whispered while they were going toward the car. "What if…"

"Sshhh... it'll be alright. You'll have your sight back. Don't worry."

"And what if I don't?"

"We'll deal with it. I'll never leave you, don't worry..."


	28. Chapter 28 New Love

**New Love**

"I don't understand," the doctor admitted. "Everything is alright, really. Everything except the fact that your partner is still blind." He was confused.

Buffy didn't know what to say. Xader's eye was fine, but he couldn't see anyway?

"There has to be some explanation!" She was angry, so she raised her voice. "No one can just stop seeing!"

"You can, of course, try a second opinion," he said, "but I can't do anything else. I don't understand it. I've never seen something like this before."

"I'll take him home," Buffy sighed. "I think I know how to deal with this." The key to this riddle must have been the demon. They had to examine it.

"I don't know… are you sure you want to take him?"

"Yes."

"As you wish, miss Summers. I would recommend to see another doctor anyway."

"Yeah, we will." But that would be Willow and Giles, Buffy thought, not an actual doctor.

She came back to Xander.

"Buffy?" he asked confused. "Is that you?" He reached his hand to her.

"Yes, it's me," she sighed and took it. "Get up, we're going back home."

"What's wrong with me?"

"They don't know," she said, "but don't worry, I'm sure that we'll find out when we'll see that demon. Giles and Willow are already working on this."

"I… I'm scared… that I'll never see your face again," he whispered, broken. "I can't live in the darkness… it's the fear after losing my eye all over again."

"You will see." She hugged him tightly. "I will do everything in my power to make you see again. Don't worry."

* * *

"Hmm… not this one." Willow put the book back on the shelf and took another one. "Nope." She stood up and came over to the other shelf. "Giles?"

"Yes?" He raised his head from some other book.

"Where is this Demon's Book?" she asked.

"Should be… there." He stood up and got closer to her. He reached his hand and took a book but dropped it. They both wanted to pick it up in the same time and their hands touched. Willow jumped like she was on fire, Giles, too, neither of them picked up the book. They looked at each other embarrassed and then they started kissing.

They knew they shouldn't. Giles could've been her father, but they couldn't stop.

Before they noticed what they were doing Willow landed up on the table and Giles pushed all the books aside… he clang to her lips again and right after that he started kissing her neck…

"My God…" Giles said while moving back. "What have we… Why didn't you stop me?!" he asked Willow.

"What is it that you are so afraid of? Your feelings? There's something between us and I'm happy we did it. I have no regrets, Rupert."

She jumped off the table and put her clothes back on.

"You are calling me Rupert and it terrifies me."

"Giles!" she laughed. "I think that…" she stopped.

They finished dressing up and looked at each other with hesitation.

"What is going on with us?" she asked. "We've just…"

"Willow, what is going on with _you_? I thought you prefer…"

"You know I've always had a crush on you. Let's call me bi then." They suddenly laughed. "Why do we think we're doing something bad anyway? We have right to do this. We're grown-ups and there are a lot of people with age difference out there, right?"

"Yes," Giles admitted and kissed her again. "Let's keep it a secret, at least until Xander regains his sight."

Just like in an answer the door opened and Buffy went inside.

Giles and Willow jumped away from each other, but Buffy didn't notice anything weird. She was too concerned with Xander's condition.

"And?" she asked. "Please, tell me you have something! No one in the hospital knows what happened to him! His eye is healthy to them."

"Where is he now?" Willow asked.

"In our room. He laid down. I hope he'll fall asleep."

"I've got it!" Giles yelled with a triumph in his voice. "Here it is! You were right Willow!"

Buffy still hadn't noticed anything weird although they were both blushed. She didn't even feel the tension hanging in the air.

"Let's hope it'll work. We have to have demon's blood… maybe we can still extract it or… Buffy, you may have to hunt another one."

But they succeeded with extracting the blood.

"Ok." Willow used her small chemical lab to make an antidote. "That should help him."

"Thank you," Buffy smiled to her. "I think he fell asleep, so I'll give it to him as soon as he wakes up."

"Good."

When Buffy was going upstairs, the doorbell rang.

She was curious who it might be at such a late hour, so she went to open the door. Maybe it was Spike, she thought. She hadn't heard from him yet, so maybe he decided to pay a visit.

But no… it was Andrew.

"Andrew!" She smiled. "Hey! Good to see you! Where have you been?"

Andrew had left them right after the battle and they hadn't seen him ever since.

"Ah, you know, I was travelling and decided to come back… to visit… How's Dawn?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know. It's late, so she's probably sleeping. If you want you may stay here, we'll find you a room."

"Thank you."

"Willow!" Buffy yelled.

"Andrew!" Willow also welcomed Andrew very warmly.

"Can you find him a room? I have to take this to Xander."

"Sure. Feel like home, Andrew. Do you live somewhere or you're just wandering around?"

"Wandering around," he answered.

"You can stay as long as you want then."

"Something happened to Xander?" he asked.

"Temporary lost of sight. Demon. But I have the antidote," Buffy explained, showing him the vial and disappeared upstairs.

Xander didn't sleep. He kept rolling from side to side.

Buffy was concerned about him. She put the antidote on his bedside table and sat right next to him, then stroked his face.

"Xander? How are you feeling? You can't sleep?"

"I don't see any difference with my eyes closed or opened - or in that matter - eye. I can't fall asleep," he sighed and reached his hand to find hers. Then he got closer to kiss her.

"You're doing pretty well so far."

"Do you want to tell me that I have to stay like this forever?"

"No, honey, I want to tell you that I'm happy, because I have a cure for you. Here you go…" She handed him the glass.

"Yuck…" he grimaced when he smelled it. "What is it?"

"You don't really want to know. Willow made it."

"So it'll work," he sighed and drank it in one gulp. "YUCK!" After a couple of seconds he blinked and... "Oh!" He looked into Buffy's eyes. "It worked!" He smiled and… ran to the bathroom.

"Xander?" Buffy went after him and found him brushing his teeth.

"I need to get rid of that taste!"

She laughed.

* * *

The door to Giles's room opened and Willow walked inside. It was night. It turned out that he couldn't sleep either.

"Rupert?" she asked, shutting the door behind her.

"Willow…" he whispered and raised up on his elbow.

"What's happening between us?" she asked and sat on the edge of his bed.

"I don't know, but..."

"But what?"

"I like it. I feel happy when I'm with you and when I kiss you… my body is on fire."

"It's the same with me."

"But what about the future?"

"Why should we worry about the future if it's not here yet?"


	29. Chapter 29 Future

**Future**

"I don't think we should tell them now," Giles said.

"Yes," Willow agreed. "Not now."

"We'll see what happens with us…"

"Yes."

"Agreed?"

"Yes."

They got closer again.

* * *

"Buffy?" Xander found her in the kitchen as she was just making breakfast for Dawn. "Let me take you to a dinner in the evening."

"Dinner? Ok. What's the occasion?" she asked. "Have I forgotten about something? Your birthday is in a couple of months and it's not our anniversary…"

"Does it has to be an occasion?" he asked.

"Ok, then," she shrugged.

Dawn entered the kitchen in the company of Andrew.

Buffy didn't say anything, but she knew that her little sister finally started to like him. Maybe it was the highest time for it? Andrew had been in love with Dawn for so long now.

Buffy and Xander walked out of the kitchen to the living room. Willow was there.

"And we have a little romance," Xander said.

Willow twitched nervously.

"What? What romance?" she asked, her voice trembling. No one noticed though.

"Dawnie and Andrew," Buffy sighed. "And when it's finally happening, I don't know what to think."

"Hmm… because of where he came from? That famous trio wanted you dead and two of them ended up dead…" Xander enumerated what made Buffy moan.

"But Andrew is not like them. He never wanted to kill anybody, it was the First. I think… I hope…" she stammered.

"Stop worrying, Buffy." Willow waved her hand. "Believe me, Andrew is a good boy. He's not evil. He wouldn't hurt a fly."

Giles entered the room.

"Willow?" Buffy asked.

"Hah?"

"What's happening?"

"What 'what's' happening?"

"You're acting a little strange lately…"

"Me? No! You're overreacting!"

"Buffy!" Dawn called her sister, so Buffy went back to the kitchen and Xander followed.

"Like a little doggy," Willow laughed.

Giles sat right next to her and reached for her hand, but she moved away.

"What happened?" he asked, clearly not understanding her reaction.

"They're already suspecting something! I'm acting strange! And what will they think when they'll see us?"

"I don't care."

"Giles, look. They will care eventually. What will we say? You know… we've spent every single night together in this week?"

"Ok, let's think this up."

"I don't want to think. I just want… to feel."

* * *

In the evening Xander put on his best suit.

"Wow…" Buffy whispered in surprise. "Look at you! You look fantastic! And this is my alive boyfriend!"

"You're not looking that bad yourself," he joked, but she saw in his eyes that he was impressed.

"Xander, it's too much," she said when he took her to the best restaurant in town.

"I have a job again," he said. "I'm a manager and I'm just about to get a promotion. Believe me, you'll have a rich hus…" he suddenly stopped, biting his tongue.

"Rich who?" she asked. "What did you want you say?"

"I'm obviously bad at this," he admitted over the glass of red wine. "I was supposed to start differently… I even prepared something… Buffy, I was completely blind for a while - literally - and… I couldn't stop thinking how beautiful you would look like in a white dress… the wedding dress, and I regretted so much that I might not be able to see you like this," he stopped for a moment and Buffy couldn't find her tongue to speak. "Then I thought that I might never see you going down the aisle to marry me and I realized I was ready. I am ready for marriage. Will you marry me?"

She still couldn't say a word, but there was only one answer she had and it was 'yes'.

"But you promise you won't run away?" she asked. It felt too solemnly and Xander was too nervous, so she tried to make a joke. "I'm sorry," she said. "It was… I just wanted to defuse some tension and it obviously didn't work."

"It's ok… Buffy, I don't want to lose you again. I don't want to feel what I felt before… twice… no, three times actually if you count the one time in high school when I thought… I thought I came too late..."

"Xander…" she leaned forward, looking him in the eye. "My answer is and will always be 'yes'".

He was beaming with happiness.

"Really?" Corners of his mouth lifted and then he smiled. "So, Buffy Anne Summers… here's you engagement ring."

For the first time in her life Buffy felt exactly like she supposed to feel when somebody proposed. Even better. And her man was alive… was at her age. The life was good again. And what was more – she loved him more than anything.

* * *

The doorbell rang.

"Who can it be at this time?" Willow signed. She and Giles were lying by the fireplace while kissing. "Dawn's sleeping, Andrew's sleeping, too, Buffy and Xander have keys…" she sighed again and stood up.

The person behind the door was the last person she expected to see.

* * *

"You won't believe it!" Buffy and Xander came back home. "Xander and I are getting married!"

They ran to the living room but suddenly stopped, because right beside Willow, Giles and Dawn (who must come straight from her bed, because she was wearing he PJs) was Spike.

"Spike…" Buffy was surprised to see him there.

"He always brings bad luck to me!" Xander said. "Did you come here to steal my fiancée?"

"Wait! Wedding! YOURS? I'm so happy!" Willow squeaked and jumped to them to hug them. "Finally, you've made it! Finally some good news!"

"Spike…" Buffy looked at him in deep shock. "Spike… you… are you eating? And not cookies… how did it happen? Why are you eating the leftovers from our dinner?"


	30. Chapter 30 Fulfilled Prophecy

**Fulfilled prophecy**

"Eee… yeah, I'm eating," Spike admitted. "And by the way, my heart's beating, too."

Buffy moved forward and put her finger to his neck.

"You have a pulse…" she whispered, stunned. "Am I dreaming?"

"No, Angel hadn't finished his big mission because he died saving your lover…"

"It had nothing to do with me!" Xander denied. "Now you're blaming_ me_?"

"If it hadn't been Xander it would've been Dawn," Buffy admitted. "Angel would've died anyway."

"Never mind." Spike waved his hand. "Anyway, I felt weird and my heart started beating and… I was soooo hungry! I ran away. You never really wanted me anyway, so I decided to leave you alone… everything's ok then, yeah?"

Buffy fell into the nearest chair.

"Ok. I'm a little overwhelmed." She inhaled deeply.

"Are you alright?" Xander asked and sat on the support of her chair.

"Yes, yes, I am, it's just… Spike? Why are you here now?"

"I had enough fun in Europe and besides, I wanted to get back here and since I'm human again, I'll have to exercise to keep fit... yeah, recess is over for me."

"Still unsatisfied. Angel would've given up everything to be where you are now, Spike," Buffy said angrily. "So hang on to it."

"I've bumped into somebody in Europe… actually, I didn't think we could…"

"Fred?"

"No. Faith."

"FAITH?" Xander needed reassurance. "And maybe you want to say that something happened between you two?"

"Maybe."

"God…" Buffy moaned. "I'm about to throw up… Spike, fell like home." The whole sentence sounded so ridiculous and funny that they all burst out laughing, all except Xander.

"Feel like home?" he yelled. "Buffy! He wasn't there when you needed him! You could avoid the whole dying thing!"

"Hah?" Spike got pale.

It was so strange for Buffy to see him actually pale when his face was normal again. He had a pulse, a warm body…

"Buffy died. At least we thought so," Willow explained. "We've suffered so much..."

"And why Faith didn't tell me that?"

"Ask her."

"Hmm… we kind of… parted."

"What have you done to make her angry?"

"Actually, it's what she's done. One morning I wake up and she's not there!"

"YOU WOKE UP? Ok, please, spare me the details. Gosh, Spike what is it with you and slayers?"

"I can't kill them anymore, right?" he asked and reached for the food. "Ok, that was a lame joke. People, why are you so stiff?"

"It's not that."

"Great! Why can't we just announce our engagement and receive some congratulations and…" Xander started.

"Congratulations," Spike said while chewing his food.

"It's really great that you two are going to be married!" Willow was still enthusiastic.

"Oh, yes!" Giles finally spoke. "When is the wedding?"

"We haven't set a date yet," Buffy said and suddenly she started wondering if… no, impossible, she wouldn't end up like Anya.

"I'll bring some wine," Dawn offered.

"Dawn…"

"God, Buff! I won't get drunk, beside… Spike will probably drink most of it anyway!"

* * *

When Buffy and Xander got to bed they were both trying to fall asleep, but none of them succeeded. They were thinking intensively…

The situation got worse the next day.

"Willow, do you have a moment?" Buffy asked. "I have to talk to you."

"Sure," Willow seemed so strange those days.

"I have my concerns," Buffy confessed while playing with her fingers.

"Xander?" Willow guessed. "Buffy, he loves you. He practically loved you his whole life. Yes, he loved Anya, but who says that there is only one person destined to be with us? You loved Angel in the past, right?"

"It's not about Anya… I mean, it is, but not this, it's about the wedding. He left her, Willow. I wouldn't survive if he left me, too."

"He won't. It's been so long since that time. Don't worry, he's mature now and he really wants to marry you. Besides, he proposed to Anya during the apocalypse what probably was his motivation… I'm sure that it was it and later on he had doubts. With you is completely different… he just proposed because he really wanted to."

"Not necessarily… He told me that when he lost his sight he imagined me in a white wedding dress and he realized that he wanted to propose."

"It's not the same!" Willow repeated, still sure of it.

But Buffy wasn't.

Xander was acting strange, too.

* * *

"Xander…" She finally dared to start that conversation two days later.

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong?"

"What d'you mean?"

"Do you have doubts? We're both acting a little strange, don't you think?"

"Maybe," he started, "but it's not what you think it is."

"Oh, really?"

"Buffy, what's happening? Tell me. You know you can."

"I can't… it can… hurt you…" she hesitated.

"It's better than keeping it from me."

"I've been thinking… I remembered… how you left Anya in the wedding day. I wouldn't bear if it happened to me."

"Honey!" He almost laughed.

"It's not funny!"

"I was thinking it was about… Spike."

"SPIKE?" She opened her eyes widely in surprise.

"If he's human now… I thought you…" Xander's voice trailed off.

Buffy started laughing.

'Hey! You used to want him! You used to prefer every single vampire over me!" Xander said.

"I didn't think about you in that way back then and besides, you were taken! Spike was the only person who understood me and I didn't want to hurt you and Willow by telling you the truth that you pulled me out of Heaven!"

"Ok, so Spike means nothing to you?"

"No. Of course he means something, I care about him the same way I care about Willow or Giles!"

"I'm relieved!"

"And don't ever think that he could be better than you!" She touched Xander's face.

"And don't you ever think that I could leave you like I left Anya. I don't have any doubts with you and I had them with her from the very beginning. I'll be honest with you, it's all because of my parents! My father loved my mother in the beginning and then they just turned each other's lives into hell. I didn't want Anya to suffer like that because of me and… face it, a relationship between a human and a demon? It's like you and a vampire. It would've never worked out. And if there would be kids? What would happened? I'm still feel insecure because of my parents, I admit that, but now I'm willing to take that risk. With you."

"Xander, you are not and you will never be like your father. You are hundred times better than he is and you won't make the same mistake he did, I believe in you. Your family…" There was a break when Buffy hesitated. She wanted to tell him what was on her mind but didn't want to hurt his feelings.

"I know..." Xander's parents left as soon as the apocalypse had started and he didn't have any contact with them now. They weren't even interested in their only son. "They don't have to be on our wedding," he added.

"They're your parents after all…"

"But I don't want them there. I want there only you and our friends, because this is my family."

Buffy smiled and she was just about to say something when she heard a strange noise coming from downstairs.

They both ran down the stairs and almost bumped into Dawn who was just doing the same.

Faith was standing in the entrance to the library and Spike was just coming out of the kitchen (with Buffy's cookies, what made her angry).

"Faith…" Buffy was surprised. "Hey."

"Hey, B." She waved to her. "You know, damn… I came here to talk to Spikey and visit you and what I'm seeing? Your so-called lesbian is just making out with your old watcher!"

"WHAT?"


	31. Chapter 31 Strange Love Better Than

**Strange love better than no love**

"Wa… wait a minute!" Buffy stammered and raised her hands. "No! It can't be! People, I'm right, aren't I?"

"Yeah, no way," Xander agreed.

Faith sighed while moving away from the door.

Giles and Willow were inside, standing right next to each other, nothing more, but they could've already stopped whatever they'd been doing.

"Do you really think I would lie about this?" Faith snorted. "Not bad… your little lesbian." She laughed.

"There has to be some explanation," Dawn said.

And everybody stared at the couple in question.

"Eee…" Willow stammered and looked at Giles.

"Oh… my… God…" Buffy whispered while covering her mouth with her hands. "It's true…"

"Nah…" Xander started, but then he was silenced when he saw the look on Giles's face.

"Wow… How did it happen?" Dawn asked.

"Maybe we could move to some more comfortable place?" Spike suggested. "I would like to hear it, too. It's like 'Passions!'. God! I miss that show!"

"Willow, you're a lesbian…" Xander said, ignoring the blond guy.

"I'm even more surprise than you are," she finally said and they had a confirmation.

"God," Buffy repeated.

"Spike's right," Giles said and they looked at him even more shocked. "Let's go sit down." They went into the library where everybody found some place to sit. Faith sat on Spike's laps.

"It just… happened," Willow said. She didn't know what else there was to explain. "I couldn't help it."

"Hmm… you had a crush on Giles in high school, but… it lasted so long?" Buffy asked.

"Eh… ee… it kind of started when Kennedy died…" Willow stammered. "Giles was there for me when I had those attacks. Something was pushing me toward the bad side. It was like I was standing on the edge... and we lost you, too, Buffy. And it just happened..."

"Do you love each other?" Buffy asked seriously. "And I except an honest answer. The shock is gone, so I won't be surprised if you say 'yes'. I want you to know that… yeah, I would tell 'disgusting' in the past, but right now… right now I'm telling that weird love is always better than no love at all. You, Willow, were in love with a woman, so considering Giles right now… I'm sorry… he could've been your father… but after all, it's less strange than women, so…" she tangled a little bit.

"Do you want to say that you have nothing against this?" Willow asked with hope in her voice and searched for Giles's hand. She found it and held it.

"Yes, I have nothing against it."

"Ok, me, too! Do what you wanna do!" Xander finished and smiled. "Gee! And I thought that there was nothing else that could surprise me in this world! And look at you, I was even more shocked than the first time I saw a vampire!"

Giles didn't speak.

"Rupert?" Willow said while looking at his face. "Did something happen? Don't you feel…?"

"It's not about that, Willow, it's about… How we can possibly succeed in this? Buffy is right, the age difference…"

"So what?" Dawn asked. "I think it's beautiful! Now we can be all like one big family!"

"Thank you, actually you can say that." Giles finally smiled.

Buffy stood up and patted his arm, then she left the room with Xander by her side.

"Buffy, what happened? I see there's something bothering you and it has nothing to do with them."

"Xander, I'm not sure if you take it well when I tell you, so…"

"Just try me. There's nothing that could possibly turn me against you, honey." He took her face in his hands and looked into her eyes.

"Ok, it's about Spike and Faith."

"And you jealous?" he asked gloomily.

"No. It's not that."

"So what it is, then?"

"I'm not sure if you can understand it the right way… men see those things differently…"

"Tell me anyway."

"You know, Faith was here before me and after me…"

"Hah?... Ah…" he understood.

Xander's first time had been with Fait. Faith had deceived Riley when she'd been in Buffy's body and slept with him, too. Now Buffy found out about Faith and Spike.

"You're right… I am seeing it differently. So what? What we have is important, right? And if Spike's in love with other slayer than mine… lucky for me."

"It's not about love, Xander. I just feel like Faith is sharing everything with me. What do I have left only for myself?"

Xander sighed.

"You know what? I think it would be better if you talked to Willow about it, but I'm sure she'll tell you the same."

* * *

"Don't worry, Buffy, I understand you, but Faith won't steal Xander from you. He doesn't see anybody beside you!" the red headed witch said.

"Eh… but…"

"I know."

"Xander told me…"

"You talked to him about this?!"

"He knew that something was wrong… I couldn't lie to him!" Buffy defended herself.

"You know what? It's a good sign… You know, you two will have a healthy relationship… I mean… you already have, but… you know… marriage and stuff…"

"I still can't believe you haven't trusted me!" Buffy suddenly burst. "Giles, ok, I understand that he didn't tell anybody, but you? Willow! I wouldn't have laughed at you! I'm too grown-up for that!... Oh…" Buffy suddenly realized that Willow thought she was not mature enough. "Willow!"

"I'm sorry, Buffy. I should've seen it, but when I told you that I liked girls, you kind of… freaked out."

"That was different."

"If I'd told you back then instead that I was in a relationship with Giles, you would've done the same and you would've advised me a boyfriend in my own age. And after all, I could finally have my revenge. You didn't tell me in the past that Angel was alive!"

"Ok, let's be serious… I really accept it," Buffy said while smiling.

"Thank you."


	32. Chapter 32 Ex

**Ex**

"What about June?" Buffy suggested.

"Hmm… summer… I like it," Xander agreed.

They were sitting in the kitchen, trying to settle the date for their wedding.

"Ok, but it's already in a month… June… hmm… how about the end of June?"

"What? You have doubts?" he teased her.

"No, but I want to make it on time with everything, if we don't…"

"Buffy, easy…"

"Do you want your family to come?" she suddenly asked.

He didn't answer.

"Ok, think about it, there will be no problem with my family, because every single person is living in this house with me."

"What about your father?"

"I can send him a message, but for Christ's sake! He didn't even care when my mom died! When was the last time he wanted to see me or Dawn?... Exactly."

"You could at least let him know."

"I don't want him here, honey. This will be a ceremony for the ones that are the closest to us, the ones that care about us and know us for who we really are, not for some people who don't, so what if he's my birth father? I always felt that my father was…"

"…Giles," Xander finished. "The one who's now in a relationship with your best friend who's not you mother because she's in your age."

"Oh, stop it! They're happy and it's all that matters. I couldn't watch their faces after miss Calendar's and Tara's death."

"Right," Xander signed. "I don't think that I'll invite my family, too."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, exactly for the same reason that you don't want your father here. Let's just write a note that we're married and get it over with… and… let's do it after the fact."

"Last time you chickened out because of your family. Sorry, forget I've said that," she lost countenance. "It sounded bad… really baaaddd…"

"It's ok. It was meant to be… Could you imagine Anya and children? You know what's the most important thing in this world? Money! Looking at money makes your mummy calm!"

"No," Buffy burst into laugh, "but you know… money's important… No, seriously, I would tell our children that what is actually important is love. It's the most important thing in the world."

He kissed her and she stroked his hand.

"What about Spike, Faith and Andrew? They can come, right?"

"Do we have to invite Spike?"

"I'm still shocked after I found out about him and Faith, but I think they would like to come together, so we have to. Faith, after all, is close to me."

"I understand. And Andrew would be a great date for Dawnie."

"I agree."

* * *

Willow and Giles were very relieved that their friends finally knew the truth.

"I know I was asking you this like a hundred times, but is it really what you want, Willow?" Giles asked while holding her hand. They were sitting in the living room, watching TV. Willow still couldn't believe that Giles actually liked what she was watching… or he probably just wanted to spend some more time with her.

"Yes, I am," she repeated and snuggled into his arms.

"Oh…" Buffy said on entering the room. "I'm sorry."

"For what? Are you starting to regret that you don't have any glasses you can just take off and start cleaning up?" Xander snorted.

"Very funny... It's just... it's all new to me, I'm sorry..." she sighed and went to the hall. "Dawn?"

* * *

_Find her…_

Now when she was full and she knew all the tricks of being a creature of darkness, she wanted to find her love. She was planning on turning her into a vampire… the vampire witch… She would be so powerful!

But then she saw them…

* * *

There was a bang and the window shattered just behind Willow and Giles sitting on the couch. Giles managed to push his love on the floor and save her from the impact of the falling glass while covering her with his own body.

Everybody got to the living room.

"It's nothing… somebody busted the window out… with a very big rock…" Buffy picked up the rock and looked outside. "What?" She couldn't believe her own eyes. "How…"

"What?" Willow stood up. "What happened?"

"Honey, are you ok?" Giles reassured and right after he said that they heard a scream full of rage.

Everybody looked where Buffy was looking…

…and there was Kennedy. She was a vampire.

"Oh… my… God…" Willow said, unable to move. "Oh, God!" She covered her mouth with her hand. "Kennedy?" she asked carefully.

Kennedy showed her fangs while growling in response.

Buffy took her stake and jumped outside through the shattered window. She didn't expected that Kennedy would be so strong! A slayer had become a vampire…

Kennedy pushed Buffy and easily threw her back to the house - but not back to the living room - she flew through it and landed up in the kitchen.

"Buffy!" Xander yelled and ran to her.

"Kennedy… no… what are you doing…?" Willow started and took one step toward her.

"Willow, she's not Kennedy! She's a vampire and she can't come in so we better stay inside," Giles advised.

Willow got closer anyway, but only a little bit. There was nothing but the couch and a broken window between them. The invisible barrier was, however, still there.

"What happened to you…?" she sobbed. "You died…"

"And I was reborn! That blond vampire saw Faith losing, but he missed me! He saved her, so I was the one who died and… some other nice vampire turned me! You don't even have the slightest idea how much power I have now! To be the slayer and a vampire in the same time!" She pulled out a tree with its roots and threw in on the house to prove it.

Giles pulled Willow again, this time on the left, because the tree fell on the right and a part of the roof collapsed.

"Kennedy…" they head Dawn's suppressed voice. She was standing by the stairs.

"And you know what, honey? I found you to make a vampire out of you, too!" Kennedy continued. "If a slayer as a vampire is so strong, just think what would happen to a witch that once almost destroyed the world! And then I saw you with this… this old librarian!"

* * *

"Buffy? Buffy!" Xander got to the kitchen to his fiancée. She was lying on the floor, motionless. "Buffy?"

She moaned quietly.

"Thanks God, you're alive," he said with relief. "Have you broken anything?"

"Noooo…" She opened her eyes and tried to pulled herself up on her elbow. She moaned again.

"Are you sure?" he asked while stroking her head.

"Yeah, help me to my feet… I have to…"

"Oh no, you won't fight her now. She's too strong."

"Just help me."

So he did.

"Ok, I'm better now," she said in a more confident voice, slowly moving back to the living room.

"I can't look at you when you're making out with this old man!" Kennedy growled. "This is war, honey! I won't give you the blessing of becoming a vampire right now!"

"Kennedy!" they heard Faith's voice from the outside. She was probably coming back from her patrol with Spike. "I thought you were dead!"

"Faith, don't get any closer," Spike warned her. "Run home, now!"

"Why? Oh, God…" Kennedy - still with fangs - got to them and Buffy lost the sight of them.


	33. Chapter 33 Danger

**Danger**

Faith flew inside the house, literally, because Kendra threw her there. The slayer landed on the ground just right next to Dawn who was still standing by the stairs.

"How… why is she so strong?" she moaned and stood up, using Dawn's help. "Spike, don't!" Faith yelled and ran out of the house.

"Faith, don't!" Buffy parroted while regaining her strength and ran after her.

Spike got to the vampire, forgetting that he was human.

"Hey, a little change, hah? You instead of Angelus?" Kennedy snorted and was just about to kill him when Faith and Buffy got to them.

Spike was fortunately smart enough to hide in the house.

"She's too strong!" Buffy exclaimed.

"You think?" Faith asked ironically. "I didn't notice!"

Buffy managed to take a stake from Faith's belt. Kennedy jumped away.

"You are not the one I want revenge on," she said and was already gone.

The slayers came back inside.

"This…" Xander pointed the roof, "…won't be easy to fix," he sighed. "Buffy, how are you feeling?"

"Willow, how are _you_ feeling?" Buffy asked her red-haired friend.

Willow was on the floor, sobbing while Giles was calming her down and stroking her hair.

Buffy didn't get any answer.

"She's in shock," Xander assumed.

"You wouldn't?" Dawn made a few steps toward him. "I need to… have anybody seen Andrew?" she asked.

"What he has to do with this?" Buffy looked at her sister, surprised. "Oh… he bought his own place a few streets away. His number's in the notebook by the phone."

"Thanks."

"Hah?" Xander still couldn't understand.

"Dawn needs somebody to talk to."

"She has a sister?" he suggested, but it sounded more like a question.

"She prefers her boyfriend. Maybe it's good for them, I'm still supporting this relationship."

"It's better," Willow suddenly said, surprising everyone. "Kennedy is dead. I mourned after her. I almost destroyed the world again and then you came to help me, Giles. This vampire outside is not Kennedy. She died once and for all and now it's some kind of a zombie for me. We belong to each other, Giles, and we will stay that way. Buffy, how can we defeat her?"

"Eh… I don't know, Willow. Is there anything like a slayer who became a vampire in the history?"

"I don't think so," Giles answered when adjusting his glasses. "If it had happened, I would have heard of it."

"Yes, I think that, too… so we have no clue of what she's capable off."

"It's like your power only ten times stronger," Spike suddenly said. "She's practically invincible."

"Gee…" Xander sighed, putting his hands on Buffy's shoulders from the back. "I'm starting to be afraid."

"She can't get into the house," Buffy reminded him.

"Yeah, but she can do practically everything she wants with it. You've seen it. It was just one tree and…"

"We have to kill her with a stake or burn her… there's no other option," Faith said. "Burning will be better."

"Maybe we'll be able to find a place where she's hiding during the day," Buffy suggested.

"We cannot do anything right now anyway," Giles said. "Willow, I'll take you to bed. You have to rest."

"Don't leave me."

"I promise I will stay by your side." They disappeared.

"Jesus…" Xander repeated.

"Yeah," Faith said. "B, any idea except finding her lair? Cos... you know... she's not stupid. We'll never find it!"

"Not really… all we can do is wait for her to come to us…" she sighed, "you know."

"She'll come for Willow," Xander finished.

"I'm not so sure about that, honey," Buffy opposed.

"Why?"

"Willow has the power to kill her," Spike said looking at Xander like he was an idiot. "A sunlight ball?"

"Maybe if I ask Willow… will she do this?"

"Willow said that Kennedy isn't Kennedy for her anymore, but I doubt it," Faith added.

"She'll come for us all: Giles, Buffy, Faith, then for you, Xander, and Dawn," Spike said.

"I'll tell Dawn to stay with Andrew. Kennedy has no idea that he's living in the neighborhood."

"We have to protect Giles first," Faith ended. "He's our priority, because he's the one Kennedy is jealous of."


	34. Chapter 34 Attack

**Attack**

"Willow?" Giles turned in bed to see her face. He couldn't fall asleep.

"I can't sleep," she whispered, looking into his eyes.

"Understood."

"Giles, I don't want you to think…"

"You don't have to say anything. Kennedy was a person you loved and then…"

"I don't know if I actually loved her. There was something between us, but…"

"Willow, you don't have to explain."

"What I wanted to say was… I love you, Giles, and… Jesus, have I just said it first?"

Giles almost laughed, but then he restrained himself. It was serious.

"Willow…" he started, "…I don't know what to say."

"Eh… I love you, too, would be fine, but if you don't want to… if you don't… I'm sorry." She lost countenance and was about to get out of bed when he stopped her.

"I do love you, I thought you knew that." There was angriness in his voice. He pulled her closer to himself and then he kissed her.

"So what is it? I know that Kennedy's dead and this thing out there isn't her, it's a vampire. You know what I feel and you obviously feel the same."

"Isn't that obvious? What will happen in ten years? With you is like with Buffy and Angel when she was in high school. You don't think about the future at all."

"Giles, you're not a vampire! You're capable of everything! You're a man, a very strong man!"

"I wouldn't go that far... Willow… in ten years… how do you imagine us?"

"Normally. As a loving couple… Don't break my heart again, I've already been through this. Can't I have a normal relationship at last?"

"Practically… none of them was and will ever be normal…"

"…but this one is the most normal!" she denied. "Leave this decision to me, ok? Don't you want to be happy?"

"I do…"

"So be quiet." She snuggled into him and finally fell asleep.

* * *

"Buffy?" Xander was surprised when he found her sitting in the living room, holding… a wedding dress magazine.

Buffy jumped and hid the paper under the pillow.

"Yes?" she asked innocently.

"Hey! You're hiding something! I've seen it!"

"Yeah… And do I have something better to do right now?"

"I don't know… maybe finding Kennedy?" he suggested.

"She won't come out until dark and I'm bored now," Buffy sulked.

Xander smiled and sat by her. She laid her head on his shoulder, so he pulled her closer.

"What about Willow? Have you seen her today?"

"She and Giles are sleeping like logs. I think they've had a talk and… hmm… they're tired."

"Oh…"

And then Willow appeared.

"What time is it?" she asked and yawned. "Eleven am?"

"Yes, sleepy head," Xander admitted. "I'm glad you're ok."

Willow sighed.

"I'm explaining it to myself in the most simple way: it's not her, it's just somebody who looks like her. You know, like the First, he looked like the dead ones we loved."

"Aha…" Buffy admitted a little confused. "If it helps…"

* * *

"Have you seen Giles?" Willow asked in the evening.

"No. I thought he was with you," Buffy was surprised.

"He was, but then he went to get a couple of books from this new shop."

"What time it was?" Xander asked.

"Why?"

"Because it's already dark outside!"

Willow turned pale.

"Kennedy wants me, not him."

"She wants revenge," Buffy corrected her. "I'm going."

"I'll find him!" Willow enchanted a little ball of light. "It'll bring me to him! Maybe I'll be there on time!"

"Willow!" Buffy yelled after her, but it was too late. She was already gone, so the slayer ran after her… Shit, there wasn't even enough time to tell Faith who was as strong as Buffy. Buffy couldn't kill Kennedy on her own! And Willow… Willow could, but would she dare?

* * *

"And what am I supposed to do with you now?" Kennedy asked with a smirk.

Giles was sitting in the chair. He wasn't tied up, but Kennedy was so strong that he was sure if he only moved, she would kill him instantly.

"We'll see… we'll see… what is it so special about you that Willow likes?" She suddenly bit him in the neck.

"Do it again and I'll kill you!" she suddenly heard and found herself thrown into the air, then landed up on the floor a few meters away. It was Willow and her magic.

"YOU!" Kennedy got to her before Willow could reach Giles.

"Giles!" Fortunately, the fresh wound on his neck didn't look very serious.

Kennedy spat on the floor.

"It's just an old blood of an old man with unusually strong vital force. He wants to live too much and it's too bad! One big paradox… and no, I don't like it! It didn't taste good!" After having said that, she hit Willow. Red-haired witch flew a couple of meters away and stopped herself in the air while using magic.

"We'll see what you're gonna say now!" Kennedy stated hitting Willow, so she broke her spell and fell down on the ground.

Kennedy took some dagger with a strangely green blade. _Poison?_ Giles thought.

She thrust the dagger into Willow.

"I could give you the eternal life! I don't want those disgusting leftovers after this old man!" The dagger didn't reach Willow, because Giles ran to her and protected her with his own body.

"Giles…" Willow moaned when she finally stood up.

He was shaking… the dagger was sticking out of his chest... and then he fell down to the ground…


	35. Chapter 35 Eye

**Eye**

"Giles!" Willow screamed with despair in her voice.

Buffy finally got there. She looked around and thrust herself on Kennedy only to be pushed off again.

Willow stood up, feeling pure rage.

Then Xander ran inside.

"Xander, don't!" she yelled, but he didn't listen.

He moved toward Kennedy with a stake, but she was faster and hit him in the face. He fell down.

"I won't let you hurt my friends anymore!" Willow screamed and raised her hands. There was a sunlight ball and she thrust it into Kennedy.

Kennedy looked at her, offended, showed her fangs and… turned into dust.

Xander was pressing his hands to his face while coughing.

"Giles…" Willow got back to him.

"What's with him?" Buffy appeared again, rubbing her forehead, her voice trembling. "Gee… she knocked me out…"

"He's alive. He's got a pulse!" Willow was relieved. "Do you have a cell phone? I'll call for an ambulance."

"Sure." Buffy gave it to her. "Xander? Xander! What are you doing here? When did you get here? I've been unconscious for a minute and you… what happened?" She was disturbed, because he didn't want to take his hands off his face.

"I can't open my eye," he said quietly but clearly.

"What?" Buffy got closer. "Take off this hand."

"No." It was one firm 'no'.

"Xander... did she hit you in the eye? It is damaged?"

"I don't know… She hit me in the face, very close to the eye and then I felt pain and I can't open it now! It hurts so much! I'm afraid if I move my hand…"

"I understand. The ambulance will be here any minute. It'll be alright."

"I don't want to be blind." He was in despair.

"You won't."

"I already know what it means."

"I should've killed her in the first place and I was just playing with her. I'm sorry," Willow said.

"Stop, it's not your fault. I would do the same if I were you. I wouldn't be able to just kill her immediately," Buffy told her.

They heard the ambulance coming.

"Here! We actually have two injured people!" Willow walked out to them.

They got to the hospital fast. Giles and Xander were immediately taken to different units.

"Miss Summers?" Xander's doctor came to them first.

Faith, Spike, Dawn and Andrew had just got there.

"Yes?" Buffy stood up. "What happened? Please, tell me the truth."

"Your fiancé's optic nerve is damaged."

"Is there any chance that he will see again?" Buffy didn't have any strength left, there was only despair. She just wanted to know the truth and cope with it the best way possible.

"I think so, yes."

"And it means…?"

"He will have an operation and until then… I can't say anything more until 24 hours will pass. Mr. Harris has 80% chance to see again."

"Thank you." Buffy smiled. "That's good news."

"Miss Rosenberg?"

"Yes?" Willow stood up and the doctor looked at her surprised.

"Mr. Giles… eh…"

Did he think Willow was too young for Giles? Buffy got angry.

"Everything's fine, he just woke up, but I still can't understand how such a rare poison got to his body…"

"I don't know either. He was attacked by an unidentified person."

"Well, you can see him now."

"Buffy?"

"No, Willow, go alone. You probably want to be alone with him right now."

So Willow went to Giles.

He was lying in bed, tired, with a bandage on his neck and under the IV.

"Poor boy." She came closer to kiss him.

"Hello, my love," he said and tried to smile but winced with pain instead.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left this case. I should've killed Kennedy in the first place."

"Willow, it's fine. I understand."

"Yeah, Xander said the same thing," she sighed and told him what had happened.

"He will make it. He has to. He has 80% chance, so he will be alright, Willow, you will see."

"I have to believe it, otherwise I'll go crazy."

"You know, what? I haven't said it first, but… Willow, I love you so much… as much as a man can love a woman. I know there is a problem with our age difference and this is the reason why I was holding back with saying those words. When Kennedy… tried to kill me… I regretted so much I didn't tell you this before as I should have. The right way, not like we did it yesterday in bed."

"It's ok." She stroked his head and held his hand.

"You don't even know how much I wish to be younger… for you… at least 10 years younger than I am now."

"No," she denied. "I don't have a problem with it! I've told you! All that matters is love."

"I know and that is why it scares me so much."

He was too exhausted to discuss it now and soon he fell asleep.


	36. Chapter 36 I'm Leaving You

**I'm Leaving You**

There was no news the next day. Xander was resting after the operation, but his doctor was looking forward for him to see again. Giles was still lying in bed. They wanted to let him home the next day.

"I'm so scared, Buffy…" Xander was squeezing her hand. She didn't want to leave him alone even for a minute.

"There's nothing to be afraid of. I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

"Yeah… big deja vu. My fate sucks. It takes away everything I care about. You, my sight…"

"But I came back and you'll see, your sight will be back, too."

"Yeah, we'll see."

"And you'll be able to see me on our wedding day."

"Have you chosen a dress already? At least you don't have to worry about me seeing it before the reception."

"Don't joke like this, please. Yes, I brought it. Willow helped. A few days ago, but of course no one knows, even Dawn."

"Even Dawn?"

"Yeah. She would immediately tell everybody what it looks like."

Xander laughed.

* * *

Giles got discharged the next day. Willow came to the hospital as soon as she woke up in the morning. She'd been sitting by his side for the best part of the night and she'd had to go home to change, take a shower and get some sleep.

"Giles!" she yelled happily when she walked into his room.

He was waiting for her, completely dressed up.

"Can we go?"

"Willow, wait, we have to talk."

"Did something happen?"

"Actually, no, but… I was thinking and… sit down, please."

"You're scaring me…"

* * *

"Ready?" the doctor asked Xander while standing over him with a special pair of scissors in his hand. "Can I cut the bandages?"

"Yes," Xander agreed huskily, "please…" His was still holding Buffy's hand.

The doctor cut it and took it off.

Xander's eye was a little swollen and still closed.

"Ok, now do exactly what I say."

"Should it be so swollen?" Buffy asked, a little disturbed. She couldn't hide her fear.

"Yes, eyes after operation are swollen for a few days and it's completely normal. You should see those ladies who want to get rid of wrinkles… that's a drama after the bandage goes off…"

Buffy and Xander laughed.

"I'm not joking, but it's ok to laugh, it's all about defusing the situation. Now, open your eye slowly and don't panic if you can't see anything more than blurry spots, it's normal ,too. You sight should come back in a while. Then everything will get clearer."

Xander did what the doctor had said. Buffy looked into his eye, the color was the same as always and she was happy to see the hazel again.

"And?" the doctor asked.

"As you said, blurry spots."

"Great!"

"You wasn't sure it would be like that?"

"Good attitude is a half way to success."

They laughed again.

"Great!" Xander snorted. "Buffy, come closer. I want you to be the first person I really see, because now you're just a blurry spot."

The doctor smiled and left them.

* * *

"Rupert, you are really scaring me," Willow whispered while looking at him with fear in her eyes.

"You just called me 'Rupert', so yes, I assume you are scared."

"Rupert, there is no kindness in your voice. You are so… coarse… What are you trying to tell me? You don't love me anymore?"

"You see? You can't stop repeating my name."

"Answer the question," she growled.

"Of course I love you! I love you so much that I have to leave you."

"Excuse me? Since when hurting me equals loving me?"

"You don't have any future with me."

"I do!"

"No, you don't. How much time do we have? A few years?"

"Sure," she snorted.

"Willow, I love you and that is why I have to do this. I can't let you ruin your future for me."

"And don't you think it's enough? I lost Oz, I lost Tara, I lost Kennedy! I can't lose you, too!"

"It will be a lot easier when I won't be around."

"Love isn't just a simple crush! It doesn't go away like that!" She snapped her fingers.

"Willow, I'm leaving and there is nothing you can say or do to change my mind."

"Rupert!"

But he was already gone, walked out of the room.

She hid her face in her hands and started sobbing. She felt her power coming to her again, but managed to turn it off. Did Giles knew what he was doing? He knew he could just leave her because she didn't need him to restrain her powers anymore?

What she didn't know was that when he turned his back on her, his face looked exactly like hers right now.

* * *

After some time Willow walked into Xander's room.

He was looking at Buffy.

"It's enough, honey," Willow heard Buffy's happy voice. It meant that Xander had regained his sight with no problems.

"Willow… God, what happened? Something with Giles?" he asked while watching her face closely.

"Yes," she murmured and sat in a chair.

"What happened?" Buffy asked, getting pale.

"He left," Willow said with no emotions in her voice.

"What? What do you mean he left?"

"Just like that. He said that I'll be better without him." Her swollen eyes told them that she'd been crying.

"Doesn't he… love you anymore?" Buffy asked carefully.

"He does love me. He loves me too much. That's why he left and that was what he said to me. He wanted me to start living. He thinks that I'll go to waste with him."

"So he loves you very much," Buffy said.

"Yeah, right," Willow snorted.

"I understand him. Angel did the same."

"Angel was a vampire!"

"But there is an obvious resemblance in their actions!"

"Willow, wait…" Xander interrupted. "He left you, ok, but… you let him go?"

"I don't understand."

"He wanted to leave and that was his decision, but where is yours? You just let him go."

"You want to tell me that…"

"RUN."

So she did.


	37. Chapter 37 Don't Go

**Don't Go**

Willow jumped out of the taxi and ran to the airport. She looked at the information board… and in this moment she realized she was too late. Giles was already gone. His plane had taken off ten minutes ago. Well, life wasn't a fairy tale, she thought and she just bought a ticket to England. Xander had been right, she had the right to make a decision, too…

* * *

Buffy's phone rang, irrupting her kissing Xander.

"Eh…" she sighed and reached for her bag.

"You're not allowed to use a phone in a hospital," Xander noticed with a funny voice.

"And what if it's something very important? For example… another apocalypse?" she retorted. "Oh… it's Willow."

"Willow? What? She's bad again?"

"No, Willow's calling, you idiot… Yeah, Will? … oooh… Ok, I keep my fingers crossed. Shall I call him?... Maybe you should… Ok, let me know as soon as you can, bye." She hang up and then she sighed heavily.

"What happened? Giles didn't…"

"No. Willow was late, he was already gone."

"Oh…" Xander hissed. "Poor Willow."

"I know how she's feeling… you know, she couldn't catch him at the airport…"

"Why do you know?"

"I was almost late, too, but you heard my voice and came back to me."

"I will always hear your voice and I will always find you… I will always be waiting for you… whatever happens…"

"Xander… if I die… I mean, really die… not just swallowed by some mystical force or sucked to Hell by some witch… you have to go on living. You have to promise me that."

"Honey, let's hope we'll never be there again." He stroked her face.

"I just want you to be happy. Even without me by your side."

"And don't you think that now when you don't have the regular duties of the leader slayer, you don't have to get hurt?"

"I'm just saying."

"So stop."

The doctor came.

"Mr. Harris, I think you can go home now."

"Let me out!" Xander smiled.

"Miss Summers… is that a cell phone?" The doctor bobbed his eyebrows.

"Where?" Buffy asked, putting her phone back to her bag.

* * *

Willow was on the plane, feeling nervous. She remembered that when she'd been nervous the last time she'd been coming back to America from England, she'd unconsciously enchanted herself, making herself invisible to her friend's eyes… No, it couldn't happen again. She had to face Giles…

* * *

"We're home!" Buffy yelled when they came back.

"And you didn't call?" Dawn growled while running out of the living room when she'd been sitting in the company of Andrew.

"Eh… Dawn, I'm sorry but a lot of things happened. You see… Giles left."

"WHAT?!"

"Yeah, and Xander advised Willow to go after him, but she was too late, so she caught the next plane to England."

"And this was on your heads? Couldn't you just call to tell me that Xander was seeing again?"

"Eh… We're sorry."

"The florist called to confirm your order for flowers for your wedding," Faith notified while walking out of the kitchen.

"Good," Buffy was happy. "Let's just hope that Willow and Giles will be back by that time…"

* * *

Willow stood by the castle's door. She was back again…

She took a deep breath and unwillingly remembered how she'd lost control, here, in the presence of Giles, when Kennedy had died. Giles had been there for her… their first kiss, accidental… and after that they'd denied it and tried to move on, but it'd come back anyway. It was too painful. The relationship she had with Giles was so strong, so much stronger than the one with Kennedy, even Oz, maybe it was even more mature than what she'd had with Tara… Yes, Giles was _the_ man, so everything should be fine.

She walked inside, didn't bother knocking. She knew that Giles had probably come here first because he didn't have any other home in England anymore.

"Giles?" she asked quietly. _Courage, girl!_ She thought and was just about to yell when…

"Oh, hey, Willow, are you looking for someone?" It was one of the slayers.

"Yes, Giles. Is he here?"

"He's upstairs in his old room. Strange… I've never seen him like that, he looked like he was just about to cry… something happened? Did someone die?"

"No… just… how can I say it… there's something between us."

"Oh…" she was surprised.

"Yes, I'll go to him."

"Sure."

Willow took a deep breath and walked upstairs, feeling like her legs were made out of jelly.

She knocked on the door leading to Giles's room.

He didn't answer with a simple 'please, come in', he just opened the door himself.

"Willow…" he was shocked to see her there, but there was also immediate joy in his eyes that he couldn't hide. His sad face transformed into a happy one and then he finally managed to calm himself down.

"Rupert…" Willow started, but when she looked at him again, she just kissed him. He didn't oppose. He closed the door with his leg and took her in his arms, but then he moved back.

"Willow…"

"Stop saying my name!"

"Why are you here?"

"Because Xander made me realize something."

"Xander?" Giles raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah, he made me realize that the decision isn't only yours to make. It's also mine. I am the younger one, so in your eyes I'm gonna be the one who'll have more difficulties with our relationship. And my decision is simple: I can't live without you. Giles… losing you… is unbearable!"

He looked at her in silence.

"I was at the airport, but I didn't make it. You were already gone, so I took the next flight and I'm standing right here. In your door. I'm all yours."

"I… I don't know if…"

"I'm telling you, the decision is also mine to make and what you've done only means that you really care about me. Thank you for proving it, but can we be together already? In a real relationship? No hiding? Let's just be happy. Let's go to Buffy's wedding as an official couple, a happy couple."

"What will you say for… engaged couple?" he suddenly asked.

She looked at him with pure happiness in her eyes and they finally jumped to each other.

"Ok, but we're going home tomorrow. Your home is in America now, Rupert, by my side."


	38. Chapter 38 The Day

**The Day**

"I'm still shocked with Xander's decision," Willow admitted while putting a veil on Buffy's head.

"You are?" Buffy bit her lip, thinking. "I think he did the right thing. He's never been connected with his family the way we all are and their absence on our wedding is a blessing, don't you think? No keep my mother away from the bar, keep my father away from the bar. Don't let my father make a toast when he's drunk. Keep my parents away from each other because they'll start a fight," she parodied and made Willow laugh.

"And no… if I marry Buffy will I be like my father in the future?" she suggested.

"Eh…" Buffy sighed and turned to her friend. "Do you think that won't make him…"

"Buffy! You can't think like that! Don't you trust him? He loves you! He won't run away!"

"I know… I just still have that image of Anya in my head…"

"You are not her."

"Wow, I'm not an ex demon, but I'm the Slayer who'd spent a lot of time in alternative reality that she called Heaven… Xander was always attracted to supernatural creatures."

"You are not Anya," Willow repeated, "beside, the other slayers gave you freedom."

"Yeah… but sometimes…"

"You really want to stake some vampire, hah?"

"Yeah."

"Look, you can unload your energy on Spike."

"He's not a vampire anymore and unloading energy… believe me, Xander is…" She suddenly blushed.

"Buffy, do you want to be like Anya? The fastest way to do it is talk about sex with Xander in the presence of other people than Xander, got it?"

"I didn't say anything." She turned to look in the mirror and check her hair.

"You look beautiful," she heard Giles's voice from behind her.

"Thank you, Giles." She smiled.

"I can't believe that that girl I always felt was my daughter is getting married!" He came closer to hug her. "My Buffy will be a wife…"

"This is a very good moment to ask… would you walk me down the aisle?" she whispered.

"I will be honored. Whenever you are ready. Everybody is waiting."

"I'll be right there."

Willow didn't look so good when he walked out.

"And what happened to you?" Buffy asked.

"Eh… he said you're like a daughter to him, but…"

"You're the best friend of this daughter and you two are engaged," Buffy finished. "Ok, I admit that it doesn't sound too good, but, Willow…"

"I know and I'll never regret it," she glanced at her engagement ring that Giles had given her when they'd come back from Europe. "I'm still recalling how romantic it was. We were almost fighting and then he just popped the question!"

"I know, I know, and you said one big 'yes' and… now I have to say 'yes' and this will be the second 'yes', which is even more important, so how do I look?"

Willow looked at her in a way 'it's like the 40th time you're asking me this question!'

"Ok, let's go." Buffy took a deep breath. "Have you checked if Xander's still there?"

"Buffy!"

"I'm just making sure."

She opened the door.

Giles walked her down the aisle and Xander was – of course - there, they were both beaming with happiness. He couldn't look more sure and Buffy finally felt like she was in the right place at the right time. It was perfect.

She looked at their guests: Dawn with Andrew, Spike with Faith and Willow with Giles.

Suddenly, she felt sadness, because her mum wasn't there… If she saw Buffy right now… she would be so happy that her daughter was marrying somebody so normal, good and wonderful like Xander.

But right now Xander was all that mattered to her. His eye. The touch of his hand. The touch of his lips which sealed the marriage…

Their first dance as a married couple.

"You look so wonderful," he said, looking at her, "but there's some sadness in your eyes."

"I was hoping you would do something stupid and you were just standing there right beside me and married me! Oh, I'm joking, of course." She laughed. "I didn't offend you, did I?"

"No, honey, so? What is it then?"

"Mum… I wish she could be here today."

"I understand. I miss her, too. She was better for me than my own mother… but you're doing great alone."

"I would like her to see me like this, just for a second, in this white wedding dress, as a woman who doesn't have to save the world all the time, as your wife. I'm sure she would like it, she would be happy."

"Yeah, good old Xander, hah? And you know what?"

"What?"

"I'm sure she's here today and she's happy. You just can't see her."

Buffy smiled warmly and kissed him.

"I am so happy with you," she whispered.


	39. Chapter 39 Forgotten

**Forgotten**

Xander sighed and stretched out, then opened his eyes. It was a wonderful sunny day… after another wonderful sunny day when he'd gotten married one hundred percent sure of what he'd been doing. Buffy… he turned his head to see if she was still sleeping.

She was, so he played with her hair.

Then she opened her eyes.

He didn't see the smile he was expecting. He saw confusion and… fear?

"Xander?!" she screamed and suddenly sat up while covering herself with a blanket. "What the hell are we doing here together?!"

"Hah?" He was even more confused. "What are you talking about? Honey…"

"Honey?!" She took her robe and put it on, then she jumped out of the bed. "Oh God, did we…"

"Buffy!"

"Impossible! How this happened?! Have we been drinking?!"

"Buffy!"

"Stop saying my name!" she growled at him. "What does that mean?!"

"We're married," he said. "Is that your idea for some sick joke? Because obviously I don't like it!"

"A joke?! Do you think this is funny?! Married?!"

"Look at you right hand and wake up, you love me!"

"I love you?!" She looked at her hand. "What is this doing on my finger? What's happening? You love Anya, I love Angel. Where's Angel?!"

"Buffy…" Xander got really scared. "Are you feeling alright? Something must've happened…" He was just about to stand up.

"Don't move!" she yelled, covering her eyes with her hands. "Tell me what the hell is happening? Where's Angel?"

"Angel's dead, so is Anya," Xander finally said and there was silence.

"WHAT?!" Buffy leaned against the wall and hid her face in her hands. "No! It's impossible!"

"Buffy…" Xander was hurt, deeply hurt. "Tell me what is the last thing you remember?"

"I don't know," she admitted, "but as soon as I see Angel it'll be alright!"

"You won't see him! How many times do I have to tell you that?"

"I can't believe it!"

"We're married, you love me, you almost died when you saved me! Angel died the same day! You were supposed to tell him that you wouldn't be with him even if he became human and…"

"Human? He's gonna be human?"

Xander sighed painfully.

"It's not happening! It's some kind of a twisted dream!" he growled.

"Yes! It has to be a dream!"

"No."

"What?"

"We can't have the same dream."

"Right. Willow?"

"Willow."

"Xander?"

"Yes?" he asked but did not look at her. He just put on his robe and stand up.

"You look… hurt."

"Because I know what happened and what I feel and there's something wrong with you."

"Maybe it's you."

"What?"

"Maybe somebody did something to you, not to me."

Now he was really terrified. What if Buffy's love was nothing more than an illusion? What if it never happened? What if this dream was really never meant to come true? It was impossible, right? Buffy actually loved him? No, wait, there had to be some other explanation! But Dawn was put into their family as a Key and nobody noticed it…

"We have to find Willow!" he decided. "Let's go. It's too painful."

Only they witnessed another strange thing.

"Don't tell me we love each other and we're engaged!" Willow was arguing with Giles in the living room. "I'm with Tara! I'm a lesbian! Where's Tara?"

"Willow… honey…"

"Don't call me that!"

"Tara is dead!"

"No! No! It's impossible!"

"Oh… Willow, they did something to Giles, too, right?" Buffy asked while walking into the living room.

"What?" Willow and Giles looked at Buffy with strange faces.

"Xander's trying to convince me that he's my husband and that Angel's dead."

"What?" Willow laughed. "And Giles is trying to convince me that we're engaged and that Tara's dead!"

Gilled couldn't stand it anymore, so he disappeared in the kitchen.

"Giles…" Xander followed him.

"Don't tell me. I have no idea what happened. Willow must have enchanted herself when she was sleeping…"

"It's the same with Buffy, she doesn't love me, she wants Angel." He hid his face in his hands. "It's just too much for me after all that happened. Can you imagine? I married her yesterday!... And the worst part is that… Buffy made me thinking… What if _we_ _are _the ones who were enchanted? What if somebody did something to us? Would you believe if somebody told you a year ago that you would be engaged to Willow?"

"No… but… Oh, God…" Giles was at the verge of a breakdown. "Xander… I don't know what's real anymore… what you are saying… considering Dawn…"

"I thought the same thing."

"My God… Can this be happening?"

"Are Angel and Tara really dead?"

"I think so… I haven't seen them anywhere."

"So maybe there's some hope for us after all."

Suddenly Dawn came into the kitchen.

"What's happening? Faith and Spike are just talking to Buffy and Willow. They're acting really strange, like they're possessed or something."

"Dawnie!" Xander yelled like the world was depending on her answer. "Have I and Buffy got married yesterday? Have Willow and Giles got engaged?"


	40. Chapter 40 Between Truth & Illusion

**Between truth and illusion**

Dawn looked at him like he was stupid.

"Yeah… and you're what? Got crazy, too? What happened with all of you?"

"So you say that I did propose to Willow? And that Willow isn't a lesbian?" Giles reassured himself.

"Yeah!" Dawn repeated while keep looking at them in the same way. "Willow's bi."

Giles was relieved. Xander sat in the chair.

"What's happening?" Dawn asked. "Somebody took your memories away?"

"No, somebody took Buffy's and Willow's memories," Xander said.

"How?"

"Yo!" Faith got into the kitchen. "Why the heck Buffy's crying for Angel and Willow for some Tara? What's happening?"

"I wish I knew… when Willow woke up this morning…" Giles stopped for a moment. "It was horrible. I would've never thought that she could hurt me so much with her words, but then I realized that it wasn't a joke and she really was sure that I used her and she kept asking about Tara and I didn't know if I should have told her that she was dead. I was afraid that the dark magic could take control over her again…"

"WHAT?!" they heard Buffy's scream, so they went back to the living room.

She was standing next to Spike with a stake in her hand. Fortunately, she didn't hurt him. Spike was standing in the daylight.

"What's going on here? Why are you human? You can't be!"

"Buffy… easy... somebody did something to you, you don't remember… You stopped at high school stage or what?" Spike asked, raising his hands in a sign of surrender.

"Yeah, I'm actually late for my class," she said and turned to the door.

"Buffy!" Xander ran to her and stopped her. "Buffy, look at me," he begged her.

"Oh my God! Xander, when did you lose your eye?" She was staring at him with her mouth wide open.

"You've seen me this morning…"

"No, I'm seeing you now for the first time today," she denied and suddenly started crying. She touched his face, but it wasn't a romantic gesture. She did is like the old Buffy-friend would do. Xander closed his one eye while feeling pain.

"I want to know who did this to you."

"Oh my God…" Willow reacted the same way.

"Tell me!" Buffy cried and hugged him.

"Poor thing!" Willow joined her.

"Everything will be ok. Somebody did something to you two, you've forgotten… a bunch of your life. There has to be some spell for that," Dawn said, trying to calm them all down.

"Who are you?" Buffy asked, looking at her. "Hey! Why am I wearing a ring? Am I a married woman? Is it Angel?" she suddenly asked.

Xander moved back, so did Dawn. They both sat on the couch and hid their faces in their hands.

"Hey!" Andrew went inside. "Hey, Buffy, how are you feeling as…"

"Andrew…" Dawn stood up and grasped his arm. "Let's go. I have to talk to you."

"And who was that?" Buffy asked.

"I really need to find Tara," Willow added.

"And who's Tara?" Buffy asked again.

"Who's TARA? Buffy! Somebody really did something to you!"

"I'm sorry, but you two are infected by some mo-jo," Spike spoke. "It'll be better if you stay here and we'll find out what it is."

"I won't listen to you!" Buffy felt offended. "I wanted to kill you! I still want to, but I can't because you're human now! Tell me how did it happen?"

"I won't tell you anything, because you'll remember when we restore your memory. Let's go!"

"I won't go anywhere with you!"

"Xander?"

But Xander was still sitting motionless on the couch.

"Faith?"

Faith listened to Spike and got to Buffy and Willow. They both took them upstairs.

"Xander…" Giles started. "We have to search for the answer in my books. There is no Willow who would help with her laptop, so… Xander?" he hesitated.

But Xander still didn't speak.

"Xander?" Giles came closer, worried about his friend who was like a son to him.

"I…" Xander raised his head. He obviously didn't want anybody to see him in the moment of his greatest weakness. He was crying. "Giles… in those cases I was always going to Willow for consolation, but now… there is no Willow! I don't even have this! I can't do this anymore!"

"I'm begging you, Xander. I barely manage to stay calm myself. Tell me, if anyone could have bad intentions toward Buffy? What do you think?"

"I used to say Spike, but…"

"I understand. I would say Kennedy, but she's dead."

"Exactly… I have to be alone now, Giles, and I can't solve this mystery right now."

"But…"

"I'll help you." Dawn appeared with Andrew. "Leave Xander alone."

"Alright." Giles took off his glasses and started cleaning them up. He also couldn't show his weakness. He didn't know what to do… and he had to know!

"I'll bring Willow's laptop," Dawn offered and disappeared.

Giles went to the library and Xander just walked away.

"Giles?" Dawn was back after fifteen minutes. "I'm sorry, I couldn't find it… Giles…" she added because she heard him sobbing. Poor Rupert couldn't restrain himself on time. "Giles, everything will be alright, I promise." Dawn got closer to him, she wanted to comfort him.

"No… I'm fine…" he denied and came out of the shadow.

"There's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm barely holding myself together. She doesn't remember me… of course, she doesn't have a sister. She really does not."

"Dawn, you are real, don't you ever forget that."

"I'm done worrying, but it hurts anyway."

"I know, it hurts me, too. Let's get to work."

"Can you do a simple spell? I can… you know, if somebody did something to Willow and Buffy, we can check it out."

"Good idea, but it will be better if I do this. You've seen how dangerous magic can be."

"Eh…"


	41. Chapter 41 Breakdown

**Breakdown**

"Are you sure it will work?" Dawn asked uncertainly when Giles sat on the floor and drew a circle around himself.

"If you don't stop taking I'm sure it won't," he growled and closed his eyes. Dawn rolled hers and started stamping her leg.

Giles spoke some strange incantations.

"And?" the younger Summers asked. "Have you found something or it's just a complete waste of time?"

"It's Kennedy," he answered, stunned.

"What? But she's…"

"I know, dead, but she had done it before she died."

"So why the enchantment worked today? Shouldn't it just go away after her death?"

"She didn't make it herself."

"So who did it then?"

"You won't believe… Amy."

"AMY?"

"Yes. The Amy. Amy who used to be a rat and she has got angry with Willow long after that."

"But it was Willow who should be mad at Amy! I wish she died when Sunnydale collapsed."

"Dawn! Only because Amy's actions are irrational and immature, it doesn't mean that she deserves to die! She is a human."

"She's a witch, and what did you say about killing witches when Xander killed those two who sent Buffy…"

"Stop it. It doesn't matter right now."

"So Kennedy found Amy? Did she know about her?"

"I don't know, maybe Willow told her. We have to find this little witch now."

"She's here? In Philadelphia?"

"Kennedy brought her here. She didn't kill her, because Amy agreed to help her."

"So why Buffy's enchanted, too?"

"Amy wanted to have fun as you young, sometimes say? But I am sure it was supposed to be only Willow."

"To hurt you. Oh, great. I'll go find Xander and tell him the news. You try find out where Amy's staying."

"Right."

Dawn ran upstairs.

"Xander?" She knocked to his and Buffy's room. Since her sister had got married, Dawn preferred to knock first. Right now she was sure that Buffy wasn't there, but she did it anyway.

There was no answer.

"Xander? Are you there?" She opened the door a little.

Xander was sitting on the bed, looking blankly at the wall.

"Xander?" Dawn walked inside and put her hand on his shoulder. "Is everything alright?"

He didn't move, didn't rect. Did he even hear her?

"Xander, we know who did this… it's Amy. Buffy and Willow will be back to normal soon. Xander, what happened to you?" She got really scared.

"Dawn, I found her! She's staying in a hotel nearby!" Giles got inside, smiling. "What happened?" The smile faded away when he saw Xander.

"I have no idea!" Dawn moaned. "He just doesn't react!"

"Xander?" Giles waved his hand right before Xander's face. Xander blinked, but didn't move. "No contact… Dawn, I'm afraid it's some kind of a breakdown…"

"Buffy," Xander suddenly said.

"Yes! We'll save Buffy!" Dawn yelled. "Everything will be ok!"

"Buffy…" he repeated.

"He doesn't even realize that we're here!" Dawn got scared again.

"Oh, Buffy… I knew you'd come! I was waiting for you…"

"Giles… it reminds me…"

"I know."

"…Tara… when Glory…"

"Oh God, Xander?" Giles slapped him in the cheek. Then the other one. Still, it didn't help. "Let's go. We'll deal with this later. Maybe he will get better. First we have to find Amy!"

They ran downstairs, passing right by Faith and Spike. They told them what was happening and they were gone.

* * *

"Are you sure it's here?" Dawn asked when they got to the hotel.

"Yes," Giles answered and they came to the room 230 on the second floor.

They knocked on the door.

Amy opened, but when she saw them she wanted to close the door back. Dawn was faster and stopped her. Giles pushed and the door opened with a bang against the wall. Amy managed to move away, she was scared.

"What are you doing?!" she asked.

"I know that you threw a spell on Willow and Buffy and we are here to force you to undo it."

"I can't! Kennedy…"

"Kennedy is dead and don't you try to lie to me that you didn't know, because otherwise you would have thrown the spell a long time ago! It was supposed to be a security thing, wasn't it? Revenge from the grave?"

Amy got pale.

"Understand me…" she started.

"Vampire threatened you, I understand that, but why did you do this when she's already gone and can't hurt you anymore?"

"Stop!" she interrupted. "No! I didn't know that Kennedy's dead! She told me to throw a spell if she doesn't speak to me in a couple of weeks, so I was waiting. She didn't call me and I did it."

"She wanted to make a vampire out of Willow!"

"Yeah, and then she wanted to kill you, because Willow… no, I still can't believe it, is it really true?"

"Amy…" Giles's voice was ominous.

"Now when you know that she won't hurt you… reverse the spell," Dawn growled. "You have no idea what Xander has already been through!"

"Xander and Buffy, hah? I didn't see that coming either," Amy said but immediately added, "Ok, gee…"

"And don't you ever show your face here again, do not visit us, do not call us, just forget about us, is that clear?" Giles reassured.

The witch sighed.

"Yeah, do you think I would want to see you again? I'm sorry for what I did, but I didn't have a choice!"

"Don't deny that you had plenty of fun. It was some kind of your own personal vendetta. Am I right?" Giles asked.

"Well… yeah…" she shrugged.


	42. Chapter 42 Xander

**Xander**

Giles and Dawn came back home and as they expected, Buffy and Willow got to the hall immediately.

"I had… no, it wasn't a dream!" Buffy rubbed her temple. "What happened… God…"

"Oh, Lord!" Willow added, also stunned, then she looked at Giles. "Rupert…" she whispered and jumped to him to hold him tight. "Can you forgive me? It wasn't me… I'm so sorry! You know it wasn't me!"

"I know, honey, I know…" He stroked her head, hugged her tight and smiled. "I'm glad you're back."

"Who did that?" Willow let him go. "Who?"

"Amy."

"AMY?"

"Kennedy made her do that what doesn't mean she didn't enjoy it."

"Great. Where is she now?"

"Don't worry, I took care of this."

"Why she's never gotten addicted to her power like me? Why am I the Dark one?"

"Because your power is special, it's big, Amy never had it in her," Giles explained. "Buffy, I think that you should check up on Xander."

"Of course! Poor thing! Will I ever stop hurting him?"

"It wasn't your fault."

"Who cares? Where is he? Why didn't he come with you to Amy?" Buffy raised her eyebrows in suspicion.

"Buffy…" Giles started.

"There's something you should know," Dawn added.

"What? Something happened?" Buffy got scared.

"Not really, but last time we saw him… he was acting like…" Giles didn't finish.

"He was acting a little crazed," Dawn said. "Breakdown?" she hesitated.

Buffy didn't say a word, she just ran to their bedroom.

"Xander?"

He was sitting on their bed, exactly where Giles and Dawn had left him.

"Xander?" she came closer.

He didn't react, didn't move.

"Xander?" she repeated.

Nothing.

She squatted by him and touched his hand. He twitched but didn't look at her.

"Xander, it's me, Buffy… it's probably some temporary breakdown… I've been there once… when Glory took Dawn… I got into some kind of trance and I couldn't get out of it..."

_First day at school… he'd ridden right by her on his board. She'd been obviously the new girl because he'd never seen her there before…_

_The day… the moment when he'd told her how he'd really felt about her for the first time… she'd rejected him… fast and simple… painless for her… painful for him…_

_Then she'd started seeing Angel…_

"Xander…" he heard her voice like from the distance. "Xander… snap out of it! Spike told me this once… Ok, it didn't help… Willow helped, but I don't want her to use her magic again… I have to manage on my own… XANDER! I love you! I am here and no one will hurt us like that ever again… we will always be together… we've just got married for a God's sake! We're supposed to go on our honey moon soon…" And then she felt sick. She closed her eyes, trying to make the nausea go away. "There's also something else I wanted to tell you. I wanted to wait for the right moment, but… maybe this is the right moment and maybe it will help you… I… I'm pregnant… we're having a baby. Finally you are the first in something… first baby… ours… honey?"

He moved! He moved!

"Xander?"

_Baby… baby… what baby? Baby!_

He opened his eyes.

"Buffy…" he whispered and blinked. He looked at her. "You love me," he said.

"Yes."

"Not Angel…"

"Angel is dead, but yeah, I didn't love him. Not really. I told you that already."

"And you realize that?"

"Yes?" she answered with a question.

"What happened to you?" He hugged her and finally everything was back into place.

"Amy did it. And Kennedy… magic… Willow got bad, too but it's ok now."

"Wonderful… wait… did you say something about a baby?"

They smiled to each other.

* * *

"BABY? Oh my God… that's wonderful! Congratulations!" Willow yelled and suddenly she looked at Giles. "Rupert…"

"What? Don't look at me like that!"

"Wouldn't you like to have a biological child?"

"I…" Giles smiled.

* * *

When nine months later Buffy finally gave a birth to a child, Willow who was sitting with Giles and Dawn in the hall, bent over.

"Willow, what is happening? Is everything alright with our son?" Giles asked. He was scared and looked at his wife's belly. Actually, they'd started trying to have a baby a couple of months ago and after some longer time, they'd finally gotten pregnant. Willow knew it was a boy thanks to her magic skills.

"No… it's not about our baby… it's Buffy's baby."

"What's with her?" Dawn asked concerned. "She'll live, right?"

"Yes, but I can feel her… Buffy and Xander's daughter is…" Willow straightened herself up, her eyes beaming.

"…a slayer," Giles finished.

"Exactly! It's a wonderful feeling to sense a new baby slayer! It's like… well, birth, but with no pain. Just happiness."

"I wonder how Buffy and Xander will react…" Dawn laughed and they saw the door opening.

"Oh… my… God…" Xander sighed. "I'm a father!"

Everybody was happy and started to congratulate him and then they all walked inside. Buffy was holding her daughter in her arms.

"So cute!" Dawn squeaked and came closer.

Xander came back to his wife and took her hand.

"Willow has… ehm… some specific news…" Giles started. "Willow?"

"Buffy… Xander… your daughter is a slayer."

"WHAT?" They were both shocked and then… everybody burst into laugh.

"And I was worried that Jenny will be just a normal human being like me…" Xander sighed theatrically and they laughed again.

"Good. It's good for her," Buffy suddenly said. "Now when there's so many of them in the world, my little girl will have the strength to go through life…"

"And her mom who is also a slayer is still alive. That means that your daughter, Buffy, will have a wonderful, full of adventures life," Giles said.


	43. Chapter 43 Unexpected Visit

**Unexpected visit**

After two weeks of happiness and peaceful life, Buffy fund out something shocking about her sister…

"We're engaged!" Dawn yelled happily while pulling Andrew to the living room after her. She screamed it so loud that probably every single person at the other end of the street could hear it.

"Really?" Xander was surprised. He was sitting on the couch, holding his baby in his arms.

"WHAT?" Buffy reacted completely different. She didn't like it at all. She was acting exactly like… well, a mother because she'd become like Dawn's mother after Joyce's death.

"What?" Dawn's smile faded. "I'm a grown-up and I can do whatever I want!"

"Buffy…" Xander started carefully.

"Quiet!" Buffy waved her hand and Xander laughed. "What?" she growled at him, baffled.

"Buffy, don't you think you kind of acting like… Dawn's mother? Just be a sister right now, you're already a mother to Jenny."

"Dawn…" Buffy hesitated. "Don't get me wrong, Andrew, please," she looked at him. "I just… I'm just worrying about you two and I'm being realistic here. You're both still so young… Is that something that you really want?"

"Yes." This time it was Andrew who spoke. "Buffy…" he grunted, "you took me to your home even though I was guilty of murder. I know, the First possessed me, but… those still were my hands that killed my friend, I know that. I know I was your enemy, you tied me up and chained to a chair, but then we'd become friends and we started fighting together…"

"Andrew," Xander interrupted, "I thought you stopped telling stores and reading your comic books."

"Xander, he's really trying here and what you're doing?" Buffy sighed. "Andrew, I like you a lot and I will be really honored if you become my brother in law. I'm just worrying that you may not succeed while getting married so young…"

"You succeeded," Dawn retorted. "You and Xander are a perfect coupe. You've never actually got into a real fight."

"Because… hmm… it was a really long time since… never mind. Ok, you want to get married, get married, whatever!"

Dawn smiled broadly and kissed Andrew. Buffy looked aside as she didn't want to see that.

"What's this gathering all about?" Willow asked, walking into the room with an apple in her hand.

Then they were all squeaking and smiling with joy and it made Giles come there.

"I can't even get a good sleep!" he complained.

"Giles, it's the middle of the day," Buffy noticed. He must have been really sleepy if he'd said something like that and the reason... well Buffy preferred not to think about Willow and him together...

* * *

In the evening, they all jumped when somebody knocked hard on the door.

"Jeez, who is that?" Dawn jumped.

"I'll go check," Xander offered but he was stopped by Buffy who placed her hand on his shoulder.

"I know that there was no danger recently, but… Xander, I'm the stronger one here." So she went to the door. Xander sighed.

"It's hard when the woman's wearing pants in a relationship, isn't it?" Dawn laughed and Xander threw a pillow at her. Jenny started crying upstairs. The knocking must have waken her up.

Buffy was pretty angry when she opened the door. It'd taken her a long time to put her daughter to sleep.

Two people almost ran inside, what meant that they were definitely not vampires.

"What the… Wesley?" Buffy was shocked. "And you are…?" She looked at the woman who came with him. "What is it? Where's the fire?"

Everybody from living room got to the hall now.

"Buffy! Thank God! We found you!" Wesley sighed.

"Fred!" Willow jumped to the woman and hugged her.

"Hey, Willow."

"Wesley." Giles stood by Buffy's side. "What brings you here? I know you were working for Angel."

"Yes." Wesley and Fred aka Illyria lowered their heads. "There is so much lost… Cordelia, then Angel… almost Fred!"

"If…" Buffy hesitated. "How is… Angel's son?" Those words sounded so strange in her mouth.

"He has a family now and he's not working with us. This is the best for him," Wesley answered.

"Oh…"

"Will you two come in?" Xander showed them the way to the living room.

"Who's crying?" Wesley was surprised to hear Jenny's cry and he went to the living room after Fred.

"My daughter," Buffy answered and there was silence. Wesley was staring at her with shock on his face.

"A daughter… oh, Buffy… congratulations… that's new."

"Yes and she's a slayer, too," Willow said when Xander went upstairs to get Jenny.

"Wow…"

"Yes, we can see how a little slayer grows up. We can watch her powers develop and it's so exciting! Maybe I will have some little warlock and then…" Willow said.

"You're pregnant?"

"Yes."

Xander came back with a child in his arms.

Wesley started at him, confused.

"Ok, I surrender. Tell me all the news you have, because I don't understand. Buffy has a child. Who's the father? It has nothing to do with Angel for sure… and there's Willow who's pregnant and Xander… oh… it that YOUR child?" He looked at the little girl in his arms.

"Yeah, what's so strange about this? I'm Buffy's husband, too."

"Hah," Wesley gasped. "I just… I thought you never…"

"I'll tell you our story some other time," Buffy reassured him and sat on the support of the chair Xander was sitting in with Jenny. "How are you doing this?" She looked at him, clearly surprised. "I have to sit by her for at least an hour to get her to sleep and you… couple of seconds and she's actually sleeping!"

"I have the father gift." He winked at her and kissed her hand.

"Ah!" Dawn raised her hand. "Wesley! Wait, wait! Maybe Giles… maybe you should bring him some glass of whiskey? A big one!"

"Why?"

"Because we have even more shocking news."

"Yes?"

"I got engaged!" she yelled. "I'm getting married! To Andrew!"

"And?"

"No, it's not the shock yet. You never guess who's the father of Willow's child!"

There was awkward silence.

"Dawn…" Willow spoke. "I think it wasn't very nice. It can be hurtful for…"

"Never mind, who is it?"

"You can say he's in this room," Buffy said carefully.

Fred and Wesley's eyes shifted from Xander to Andrew… no, impossible, and then…

"WHAT?"

Giles smiled, a little embarrassed

"Happy like never before!" He put his arm around Willow.

"Wesley…" Willow started, "Fred… you haven't told us why you are here… Why were you knocking so hard? Did something happened?"

Their faces changed…


	44. Chapter 44 It's Coming

**It's coming**

"No!" Buffy denied. "Don't tell me that you're all in danger and I have to protect you or… there's another apocalypse coming! No, forget that… I can't fight anymore!"

"Yes, it is coming," Wesley interrupted, "and yes, we do need you."

"Wait!" Xander yelled. "There are hundreds of other slayers out there, maybe even thousands! Buffy deserves to finally be free!"

"Yes and no," Fred spoke enigmatically. There was silence. "Wesley?" she turned to him. "Tell her."

"I was counting on you," he sighed. "Another Hell Mouth," he continued.

"Hah?" Buffy bobbed her eyebrows.

"The one in Cleveland?" Giles guessed. "I mentioned about it after Sunnydale was destroyed."

"So what? It doesn't sound so tragic. There was a Hell Mouth under Sunnydale for a long time before we destroyed it!" Buffy started.

"Yes, but… now every single vampire that survived… is in Cleveland. They have their headquarters there."

"But Spike killed them all with that locket!" Dawn opposed.

"Just under Sunnydale. The rest survived and they came up with a backup plan."

"Ok, but again the same: why the hell me? Why do you need _me_?"

"Because you have to, Buffy."

"I don't understand," she wasn't letting it go. "Am I better than the others? We have the same chance in a battle!"

"You're wrong. You are the strongest one. Why? It's that simple: you were the very first one, then Faith came and then the rest. You've got the best experience. You know how to control your power and what to do. What sacrifices to make and what kind of decisions."

"It doesn't mean I will be better! I've been through enough! I've survived too much and… technically…"

"You have to lead the army and save the world. Again. You have been chosen," Wesley repeated.

"No!" Buffy raised her voice a little too much and everybody went quiet. "No, I can't! I have a family now! My daughter needs a mother!"

"Nobody said you would die," Fred noticed.

"I don't care! Do it yourself!"

"It's all because of you! It's all happening because of you! Here! I said it! I didn't want to, but you left me no choice," Wesley said sharply.

"Excuse me?"

"Yes," Fred admitted. "You started it. They want revenge on you. You know how many slayers are up there? This world isn't a safe place for vampires anymore! They wanted to win the battle, but you won. Remember? In England. Now they are killing lonely slayers one by one. They want to attack your family. If they find out that you have a daughter…"

"Yes," Wesley confirmed. "That's true, Buffy. You have to embrace it. Wherever you go they'll hunt you down. They want to kill you and everybody close to you. They will chase you until they will get you. That is why we've been in such a hurry."

"Buffy…" Giles started.

"Don't!" She silenced him with a wave of her hand. "What do you want me to do?" She stood up, looking at Wesley and Fred.

"Buffy!" Xander objected. "Think what you're doing! I won't let you!"

"And I won't let you or anybody else get hurt or die for me! Not Jenny, not you, not Dawn! Nobody! I can't let innocent people suffer because of me!"

"We can hide when no one will ever find us. Even them."

"No. You got it all wrong, Xander." Buffy avoided his eye.

"Why?"

"If they don't find us they'll kill our families, even your parents, even my biological father, then they'll start to kill innocent people who don't even know us!"

"But nobody said…" He stopped when he looked at his friends. "Jeez..."

"The only choice I have is to fight, but I won't let my daughter be there when it'll happen. You have to take her away."

"WHAT? No! I won't leave you!" he objected again and accidentally woke up Jenny. "Sshhh… Dawn, can you take her upstairs? Thanks."

When Dawn came back, Buffy spoke again, "I won't let them hurt my family. I have to face the consequences of my choices in the past. It doesn't matter if there were good or bad. They expect me and I will face the enemy. Xander, you'll take Jenny, Dawn and Andrew and you'll run as far away as you can."

"I think that those vampires don't know that Jenny exist," Wesley comforted them, "still, the child can't be around."

"Sure."

"Giles…" Willow turned to her husband as they were already married, "I want you to run with Xander and the rest."

"What? Willow… I… no, I can't."

"I'm sorry, but you can't help us here. We don't need another watcher. I don't need you to control my powers anymore and I'll be useful with my magic. If you disappear you'll survive, but if you stay…" she didn't finish, but everybody understood anyway. She wanted to protect the one she loved. Tara had died because she'd been right beside her and it didn't matter if it'd been an accident.

"Fine," he sighed. "What about our baby?" He placed his hand on her belly.

"What can I do about it?" she asked. "You can't take him like Jenny, because he's still inside of me." They laughed what made them feel a little less tensed. "I'll be careful, don't worry about him."

"Buffy, I want to be by your side," Dawn said.

"I know," she sighed. "As always. But again, I want you to be happy and I want you to survive, along with your fiancé. If you stay you may not get so lucky. I will need Faith though." She turned to Willow. "Find her."

"Ok, I'll call for her." Willow closed her eyes and opened them again. "Spike?" she asked. "He's not a vampire anymore, but what about him? He can't stay and fight and I'm sure he'll come here with Faith."

"I know. Just call for them, then we figure something out."

"Ok."

"Xander, Dawn, Andrew, Giles… go get ready. Fred…" Buffy turned to her new friend. "You do have some power, don't you? You can be useful in the battle."

"Some power? Buffy, I can take you and a dozen of slayers at one time. Believe me, I can be very useful."

"Great."

"I have an idea," Willow started, "but it's kind of… shocking. Buffy, can I talk to you in private?"

"Sure, let's go to the kitchen."

* * *

"WHAT?" The blond slayer opened her eyes widely. "You're kidding, right?"

"No, I'm not. It'll be just for the battle and then… puff… like a ghost."

"I know."

"We need Spike in that case."

"Yes. Alright. But don't tell anyone, especially Xander."

"Of course."


	45. Chapter 45 Desert

**Desert**

"Willow, how could you?" Buffy got angry. "Which part of 'don't tell anyone until they run away' did you not understand? Beside… Giles? He shouldn't know! He's running away with the rest!"

"Buffy, relax, Giles is really trustworthy and you know that. I had to tell him. How would I know where to look for this kind of information?"

"From the Internet? Using your power? I don't know!"

"It would took too much time and I'm sure I wouldn't have found this on the Internet!'

"So?" she asked, still angry with the red-haired witch.

"I know where it is now. I asked Giles, because he took you to that desert once, so you could talk with the First Slayer."

"Yeah… and she told me that death was my gift, couldn't she just say: you'll die, Buffy, deal with it?"

"You should stop mocking powers you have no idea of!"

"I'm sorry… I… what if Giles tells Xander? What if he finds out and thinks…"

"It won't come to that and who if not Xander should understand? You chose _him_, right? You married him and you have his child!"

"But… even though…"

"Come on." She looked at her watch. "Looks like they should be taking off by now. Come…"

They ran downstairs where four grown-ups and one child were just about to leave.

"Xander…" Buffy whispered and moved aside with him and Jenny in his arms. He gave her the baby, so she hugged her daughter and kissed her forehead. "I love you, don't you ever forget about it, my little slayer… Xander…" She looked into his eye and got closer. They kissed. "I love you. I'll try to end this as fast as I can and I'll find you before you even notice we're separated." They both knew that she was telling him that only to make them both feel better.

"You don't have to hurry, just do this and stay alive. We'll wait for you. I'll always wait."

"If… I'm scared that I'll miss something important… like the first smile of hers." She looked at Jenny.

"I found a solution." Xander smiled and pointed at Andrew. "I forced him to take his camera."

"I want you with Jenny in those movies Andrew will make."

"You've got it, but I always say I'm not the guy who looks good in the pictures or movies in that case."

"Bullshit." She smiled and hugged him tightly.

Then he turned round and took his bag.

Willow and Giles were also standing aside, none of them spoke. They just kissed and hugged. Then he put his hand on her belly and looked into her eyes.

"Dawnie…" Buffy wiped the tears off her face and got to her sister. "Hold on. Don't let something bad happen to you."

"I won't, Buffy, and I will protect her with my life," Andrew reassured her.

"I still can't understand why you aren't going with us," Xander said to Spike. "You're human, you'll die there."

"I have my reasons," Spike answered.

Xander was surprised that no one supported him. Even Giles! But Giles probably preferred Spike to be far away from him.

And they were gone. Just like that.

"Ok," Willow said. "Now we're taking off!"

"Maybe somebody will finally tell me now what we'll do?" Faith asked.

"Willow wants to use her power to open a magical passage in a cave on a desert to talk to Penepe."

"Hah?"

"She's a goddess, a guardian of passages between dimensions and the world of the death," Wesley explained.

"Oooh…" Faith was shocked. "Seriously?"

"Yes," Willow confirmed.

"Wait… you're kidding!" Faith looked at them closely. "Spike's human!"

"It's not just about him," Willow explained. "Spike will be a vampire again for the time of the battle and all of those who died will be there, too. They'll come back to fight by our side."

"Are you talking about… Angel?" Faith asked carefully.

"Yes." Buffy looked down. Who could be more afraid of that meeting than she was? Angel had died and right before it'd happened he'd still thought that he and Buffy would be together… but it hadn't been true." And… Kennedy…" she added.

"And that's it?" Spike snorted. "You don't have anybody else?"

"Couple of dead slayers… that's all. It has to be someone who would like to fight by our side, not the other way around. Angel and Kennedy will be enough, and you, of course."

"Ok, let's go then."

"Hah, The Bloody William will be back!" Spike exclaimed. "Hey, I'll still have my soul, right?"

Willow took them outside.

"We have to join ourselves together by holding hands," she commanded.

"I don't get it… you want to tel…" Faith started but when she touched Willow's hand, she felt her feet away from the ground and… she was back on the ground again, but in a different place.

She looked around. Yeah… she was right, they teleported here. They were on a desert.

"Willow?" It was Buffy. "You really should've warned me before this… ouch…" She rubbed her head. "I'm fine if somebody ask," she added.

Willow was standing by the big rock in front of the cave.

They joined her.

The red-haired witch closed her eyes and raised her arms up to the sky, then she spoke something in some strange language.

…a door appeared in the rock…


	46. Chapter 46 One Last Meeting

**One last meeting**

"I'm worried," Dawn admitted. She was sitting on a rock by the fireplace. "I wonder what they're doing right now."

"I wonder if the battle's already started," Xander added while feeding Jenny.

"And I still don't understand why can't we go to some hotel! It wouldn't have to be expensive! Who would find us?" Andrew was complaining and Giles looked at him menacingly. "Ok! Ok!"

* * *

Willow went through the door. Buffy followed her and then the rest.

The entrance closed behind them and there was complete darkness. Everybody looked around in panic.

"Oh, big Penepe!" Willow exclaimed. "We came to you with a great request. Please, let the two great warriors return to us, so they could fight by our side one last time. We are begging you for a couple of hours with Angelus and Kennedy and the dead slayers. We are begging you to give us back The Bloody William!"

Then there was this annoying silence and…

Out of nowhere the light appeared in the distance, but they couldn't say what it actually was.

They saw a strange flash and the cave was illuminated with a red light.

Spike howled.

"Spike!" Buffy and Faith screamed his name in the same time, but it was Faith who got to him. Buffy wanted to do this, but she knew it would be too much. Faith was the one who dated him now, not her.

Spike suddenly stopped screaming.

"Wow…" he whispered and showed them his fangs.

Faith laughed out loud.

"Hey! Red head! It worked!"

But if it worked… Buffy felt her heart pounding harder and harder in her chest, every single beat was lauder than the previous one… and it wasn't because she was about to see Angel again… no… she reacted like that, because she was scared. She actually felt good about the fact the she'd never managed to tell him the truth about Xander and now… now she had to do this and she was afraid of his reaction.

"Buffy…" She heard Willow's trembling voice. She looked at her, but Willow pointed something in the distance.

Two persons. One taller, the other much smaller.

"Oh, God…" Buffy whispered and squeezed Willow's hand in search for some support.

They were coming. Angel and Kennedy. They hadn't changed at all. Kennedy was human, a slayer, and Angel was a good vampire.

"Buffy…" it was the first word he spoke. It sounded soft and tenderly. Buffy trembled. "Buffy!" he yelled happily and started running toward her. Kennedy did the same when she saw Willow.

"Buffy… I… I'm so sorry… I died… I was careless… and you…" He took her face in his hands and wanted to get closer, but Buffy moved back.

"Angel…" she said carefully. "I… I…"

"Yes?" He smiled.

"I have a husband and a daughter now," she finally spoke and strangely her voice didn't tremble. No emotions. "Willow, too… she's pregnant… and… it's all for them…"

There was silence. Kennedy didn't speak. She looked at the ground. Angel was too shocked to say a word.

"What?" he asked eventually. "I… understand…" he suddenly added. "You moved on. I understand. I wasn't there, I..."

"It wasn't exactly like that," Buffy hesitated. She could let him think that it'd all happened because he'd died, but it wasn't right. How could she lie to him like that? He deserved the truth, even though it was so painful.

"Your death had nothing to do with this," she finally confessed.

Kennedy was so surprised that she looked at her.

"I… I wanted to tell you that before you died, but… I didn't have a chance…"

"What are you talking about?"

"I chose Xander. Long before your death," she finished and looked down on the ground, trembling, waiting for the worst.

"So I think it's a good thing that I died," he said in cold and emotionless voice. Then he moved back and stood by Spike. Buffy was surprised. "Ready?" he asked his blond buddy.

"Sun set. We can go," Faith notified.

Buffy closed her eyes to fight back tears. She knew what happened. She hurt him. She hurt him so much that he couldn't even look at her.

"Willow…" Kennedy finally took the courage to speak.

"Maybe I just…" Buffy was about to leave when she felt Willow's hand squeezing hers even harder.

"Really?" they heard Angel's surprised voice in the distance. "Willow and Giles?"

"Shit…" Willow cursed, because Angel couldn't choose a better moment!

"Willow, I'm sorry…" Kennedy finally said.

"What?" Buffy and Willow gasped in the same time.

"I'm sorry for everything that I've done to you when I was a vampire! I don't think that at all! It was a demon, not me! You know that, right? I know that I died and I don't mind your relationship with Giles and the baby, really, I just want you to be happy!"

Buffy finally left them alone.

"Angel…" she tried to get closer to him again.

"No, Buffy!" he stopped her. "Don't say a word! Ok, I understand! You fell in love, obviously our love wasn't as strong as I thought it was!"

"It was my first love and this kind of love never lasts, only in rare cases," she answered. "But I really loved you."

He didn't react.

* * *

"How they actually want to defeat this army?" Xander asked. He was bored with doing nothing. "And what's Spike doing there exactly?"

"I think it's time for you to find out the truth," Giles answered. "Willow has an intention… but… I think she's already done this… she asked the Penepe goddess to give them back Angel, Kennedy and the Bloody William."

"WHAT?" Xander couldn't be more shocked and angry on hearing that.


	47. Chapter 47 Last Battle

**Last battle**

"She wasn't completely honest with you, because she knew that you would react exactly like _that_!" Giles growled at Xander.

"Xander, you have nothing to be worry about," Dawn added. "We all know and see how much happy you two are with Buffy. She's completely over Angel and don't forget that she'd chosen you long before he died!"

"So why the hell didn't she trust me enough to tell me this?"

"Because she knew what you would think! What if Buffy sees Angel after so much time? What if he's alive again? Would she think that she made the wrong choice? Xander, don't try to hide it, we all know that that's exactly what you're thinking right now and I'm saying that you're wrong," Dawn finished.

He looked down and there was silence.

They suddenly heard some noise, a quiet rustling.

"What is it?" Giles and Xander stood up, looking around.

"Somebody's here," Xander whispered and put his finger to his lips. He signaled Dawn and Andrew to stand up and move back.

Something was definitely coming.

Dawn got pale, but she listened to him.

They heard a growl.

There was no sense in keeping quiet anymore. The enemy had already spotted them.

"Vampires," Xander said. "They tracked us down!"

"They probably felt Buffy's scent on you and Jenny, damn it!" Giles cursed. "We have to run!"

"We have to fight!" Xander growled.

"You have a baby!" Dawn reminded him.

"And that's why you'll take her and run as fast as you can!" he commanded her and handed her over his daughter.

"Whaatt?" Dawn stammered.

"They will hunt us as long as they kill us or the sun appears. Clearly, the battle has begun," Giles spoke. "There is too much time until the sun raises again, so we won't manage to run far. Go, Dawn... Andrew?"

"I'm staying to fight," he decided.

"How will you find me?" Dawn asked while doing everything she could not to cry.

"Willow uploaded me with her magic just in case. Jenny is a slayer, so I will find you," Giles assured her and then he screamed, "RUN!"

That was enough for Dawn. She kissed Andrew and disappeared in the darkness.

"Do you have stakes?" Giles asked as they moved forward.

Six vampires were waiting for them.

* * *

Giles was right. The battle had begun.

There were so many enemies and some of them must have broken further.

Buffy was scared for her family, but she was fighting bravely… with Angel right by her side.

"When was the last time you staked a vampire?" he asked.

"It's been quite long."

"I can see that."

"Hey!"

"What?"

She got better.

"This provocation was supposed to help me?" she asked sarcastically.

"Yeah, but it was also the truth."

"Yeah."

"I see that you have what you always wanted," he noticed.

She didn't answer.

"You don't have to hide it from me," he said while staking two vampires at once and a second after that, the one who wanted to attack Buffy from behind. "I'm glad that you can not be a slayer, that you can have a baby, that you don't have to worry about her losing a mother some day."

"Angel, I'm sorry, you know that, right?" She stopped and looked at him. Then her hand with a stake pierced another vampire's heart behind her. "Oh, look, there's still something here," she pointed her head. "My instinct."

"Buffy, that was a big shock to me," he admitted, "you know, before I died I'd been so sure that you'd chosen me. I would never have thought that Xander…" he sighed, "that he could be such a dangerous opponent to me."

"You always treated him that way, didn't you?" she moaned. "Even when we were in high school… I mean… you never took him seriously, never noticed that he could be the one and you were always teasing him, at least in the beginning, and don't you try to deny it. I know the truth."

"Yeah," he admitted. "I would've said 'sorry' to him if I could."

"I'll tell him."

"But I have to know one thing."

"Yes?"

"You still prefer me over Spike, don't you?" he asked while smiling.

Buffy laughed.

"I've already told you that. I couldn't imagine me and Spike really together and I still can't."

"Good. I'm glad. You just improved my self-esteem."

"Hey! It's not like that!" she opposed. "You know how it is… if I'd known the prophecy earlier, if you'd become human faster… I would've been with you, I guess."

"I know and I'm sorry for what I've done and how I've treated you back there in the cave. I tried to put myself in your position and everything became clearer."

"Thank you."

"They could use some help, you know." He pointed Faith and Willow.

"Ok, let's go."

After some time altogether with success the defeat came…

* * *

…on both sides…

Dawn felt that something was wrong… They were gone for too long… still, she couldn't go back…


	48. Chapter 48 Coda

**Coda**

"FAITH!" Spike screamed and ran to her.

It was too late…

* * *

Dawn heard some footsteps. She didn't know if she was supposed to run or wait. Maybe they were her friends and her fiancé.

She saw Giles, but…

"Where are Andrew and Xander?" she asked

"Dawn…" Xander appeared.

"Andrew… he's barely alive," Giles finished while pointing at Xander who was carrying Andrew.

* * *

_Andrew moved forward._

_"Andrew! Wait! Let's do this together!" Xander yelled after him. "We have to develop some strategy!"_

_"You're both fathers, so let me do this!" He didn't move back._

_He staked two vampires, but the third one… took his stake away and…_

* * *

"He missed Andrew's heart just about an inch," Giles said. "I'm sorry, Dawn. I'm afraid he's going to die. There was nothing we could do. I'm so sorry…"

Dawn jumped to Andrew. He was unconscious…

"He was always acting like a coward and now…" she stopped. "My hero." She cried and Xander got to her to hold Jenny before she would drop her.

"I stabilized him with magic, put him into a coma, but I don't think we'll manage to take him to Willow to heal him in time," Giles said.

Xander couldn't not notice the resemblance to Anya's death. She'd sacrificed herself to save Andrew and now he'd almost done the same. In the name of friends, love and in the name of family.

"Buffy…" Xander thought. "Buffy… where are you…"

_"Xander…"_

"What?" Xander raised his head and looked at his companions.

"We didn't say a word," Giles said while hugging Dawn.

_"Xander…"_ he heard again and realized that the voice belonged to Willow. He heard her in his head.

He focused. _What? What is it that you want to tell me?_

_''I tracked you down thanks to Jenny… Xander, we've won, but… don't worry, Buffy's ok, she's barely wounded. In the last moment an arrow scratched her, but she'll live. It's Faith… Faith's dead. Spike died right after her... We're coming home. You should come back too. We'll be waiting.''_

_''Andre's barely alive. We don't know if he holds on any longer,"_ Xander thought and imagined what had happened.

_''God… Giles? Jenny?''_

"Everything's ok," he said and realized that he'd said it out loud. He lost his connection to Willow in this very moment.

"I'm sorry, Willow contacted me, it was an answer for her. I told them that the rest of us is ok."

"Everything's fine with them?" Giles stood up and looked at Xander intensively.

"No. Faith and Spike are dead."

There were silent.

Giles decided to use all of the magic he had left to get Andrew home in hope it would be enough...

* * *

"I feel like I'm melting down…" Angel said to Buffy. They were sitting in the clearing. They could see what was left from the battle in the distance. Kennedy got pale, almost transparent too.

"Will we meet again?" Buffy asked and held his hand.

"If not in this world, we'll meet in another," he answered and kissed her cheek. She felt it only a little as he was so transparent. He was losing his physical body.

"I wish I could be present in your life. As a friend."

"I wish that too, Buffy. I love you." In this very moment he was gone. Buffy's hand grasped the air and clenched.

She cried…

* * *

Two groups found themselves in the same time.

"Xander…" Buffy whispered, seeing him in the distance and she ran toward him. He ran too and they met halfway, jumping into each other's arms. Willow ran to Giles… Dawn stayed by Andrew. He was still breathing, but…

Then Buffy hugged Dawn who started crying all over again.

Willow let Giles go, so she could get to Andrew.

"Can you do something? Anything?" Dawn sobbed.

"Yes, I think I can." Willow smiled. "He'll be alright."

The relief on Dawn's face was so nice to the eye.

"Where are Wesley and Fred?" Giles asked Willow.

"They left right after the battle."

"So you wouldn't have a problem with this?" Buffy asked, surprised. "I'm really sorry that I haven't told you, but I didn't know how you would react," she babbled to Xander, "and you probably want to know if I felt anything for Angel when he… my answer is - I didn't. I just… saw my dear friend and I lost him again… and I didn't even get him back, because it was some kind of a projection…"

"I would have a problem. I'm sure of this now, but… Giles and Dawn made me realize that… I trust you and… I will never have such a problem again," Xander reassured her.

* * *

Andrew came back to health and they all wanted to put the bad years behind them and threw him and Dawn a great, fantastic wedding.

"I made the right choice, Buffy," her sister told her. "When I thought I lost him… I realized that he is and always will be everything to me."

**the end**


End file.
